Toddlers & Preschoolers

Darj
Want to know the pro and cons of having a single child
by Darj
January 21, 2013 at 9:23 AM

Hi

I think of conceiving for the second time buy my husband thinks it other wise and says he's happy with one.

I have a son of 5.

Just want to know the negative part of having just a single child and the social effect he'd suffer from, if it does have one???

Seeking advice


Replies

  • ejsmom4604
    January 21, 2013 at 9:35 AM

    Nothing majorly negative, just some lessons may take a bit longer, but usually not. As long as your son is given time to socialize outside of school, he should be fine. Spending time at playdates helps make up for any absence of siblings. The biggest issue would be keeping him grounded and him knowing the world doesn't revolve around him. My oldest was an only child (and grandchild and great grandchild on my side, and still is) for 7 years. The biggest difference is your son won't have any "compitition" from brothers and/or sisters for your attention. And that isn't a bad thing :)

  • .Angelica.
    January 21, 2013 at 9:47 AM
    Having grown up in a family of 6 kids with cousins, friends and neighbors always around i personally would get lonely without people always around. Lol but im not saying Being an only child is horrible. There are pros and cons to both sides. I only have 2 kids now but really want another.
  • emeraldangel2.0
    January 21, 2013 at 10:03 AM

    i come from a big family and that actually has made me happy with just one child

  • AmyL3469
    January 21, 2013 at 10:16 AM

    I was an only child and didn't mind it. However, my girls are 15 months apart and I love seeing how they interact with each other. Sometimes I wish I had what they have, but I wouldn't change my upbringing at all. I was raised by my grandparents until age 7. My mom worked 2-3 jobs and wasn't home often. I didn't have any social issues because of my being an only child. I knew how to share and clean up my messes. It just depends on proper parenting with things like that. Take your kid to classes, playgroups, stuff like that to be around other kids. I started karate at 4 years old, girl scouts shortly after.

  • momma1708
    January 21, 2013 at 10:19 AM

    I don't think that there is anything negative about it. I have a DS and DD. DS is a great big brother, they of course fight but most of the time they play very well together. DS has someone to play with and so does DD. He has helped her with her potty training (she is 2 and he just turned 5) He helps me a lot. Of course they both get jealous of each other and it is hard to divide my attention evenly, but I am a single mom and I don't know if that is any easier when you are married. I love both my kids so much and that is all that matters. At the end of the day it is 2xs the smiles, 2xs the laughs, 2xs the hugs and kisses and "I love you"s. Watching them play together is awesome. DS tries to teach DD how to write the alphabet and it is so cute. They play together more than they fight.  

  • Jenn8604
    January 21, 2013 at 10:21 AM
    Having an only child can be lonely for that child. I dated a guy who was a lonely child he called himself that cuz he said he always wanted a sibling and was lonely growing up and you can only blame the dogs and cat so many times when you do something your not supposed to.
    The cons of multiple children is you have only 2 arms and they all need you all at once.
    I have a niece and trust me her and my ds ALWAYS need something at the EXACT same time when I watch her.
  • jcm28
    by jcm28
    January 21, 2013 at 10:24 AM
    Omg I have three and the fighting sucks. They even fight with my 2 year old. My kids are 13 10 and 2. No hitting . But it drives me nuts. I will not have more. One is so much easier.
  • Raeann11
    January 21, 2013 at 11:14 AM

    I couldn't image only having one child. Yes right know I would have way less to do but that is not what I like. I love having little ones around and know the day we don't have a little one around will be hard on me.

    My birth mother was an only child and she hated it. She was lonely all the time. 

  • PEEK05
    by PEEK05
    January 21, 2013 at 11:49 AM

    I don't know.  I don't have just one child.

  • MamaDearie
    January 21, 2013 at 11:49 AM

    I can only speak to my own experience. I am an only child. When growing up, we moved around quite a bit and I was shy. It would have been nice to share those times with. As a mother now, I feel bad that I can't provide aunts, uncles, or cousins for my children. Having lived through the slow deterioration of my grandfather and watching my mother care for him with some help from her two siblings, it occurs to me that any needs my parents have as they age will fall squarely on my shoulders- and mine alone. Being an only child will not just affect your son now. It will affect him for his entire life. Try to consider that as you make family planning decisions.

    For these, and many other reasons, I have always known that I would have multiple children.

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