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newmama93
Met new man im falling for dont know what to do
April 17, 2013 at 12:13 AM
I'm a single mom of a 7mnth old.. Me and my x (baby daddy) have been split for 6 months now... Ive resently started seeing this new guy who im starting to fall for.. We agreed to take it slow to get to know each other he just resently got out of a long relationship as well ands now wanting to get his heart broke again... Anyways.. We've been seeing each other for bout a month now and hes great my family loves him.. He had no problem with my son and hes so sweet and amazing... It scares me I'm falling for him I don't know what to do cause I don't wana get hurt eather.... He tells me he likes me can see us being together but just wants to take it slow.. I was fine with it at first now I want more I really like him an d I guess I'm scared hell slip away... Someone please tell me what I should do.. sorry its so long

Replies

  • SnapIt
    by SnapIt
    April 18, 2013 at 11:52 AM
    Not that they were never single
    They have a different view once they marry or are married, because they sometimes respond to what they think their wives want to hear.

    If they have never been married you get a more truthful answer from them


    Quoting AM-BRAT:

    Lmao because married men were NEVER single. Smh.



    Quoting SnapIt:

    Thats a question for a single guy, not a man who is married



    Quoting AM-BRAT:

    I just texted him and awaiting an answer. Where did you meet this guy?







    Quoting AM-BRAT:

    I guess whatever works for you. I know anything can happen.







    I'd be wary of a dude that was hot on a chick with some other dude's spawn dresh out the vag though. I'll ask my dh if he would like that...





  • freckles91
    April 18, 2013 at 11:59 AM

    The same thing happened with me, i was afraid to get hurt when i met my boyfriend first. He met my son from the word go, and though some people might dissaggree with this, i also had no choice as he goes everywhere with me! For me though it was the best approach! It meant that he was fully aware of what he was getting into! There was no point in me meeting him without my son for months and him having a different view of what my life was like! he was landed down in the middle of reality! 

    I stressed overhow fast things were moving with us and that got me nowhere except a one way trip to stressville! So i stopped looking too far forward and stopped living in  the past and started taking every day as it came, and things are still working out :) He knows and undertstands how demanding being a single parent can be, and helps with EVERYTHING even when he doesnt have too! Obviously find out how he feels with regard to ur child and make sure he is aware that ur child always comes first, but dont forget to be happy yourself :)

  • ashley9603
    April 18, 2013 at 12:06 PM

    I would not  be dating again that soon let alone let family meet him...Take it slow and easy since its only been a month.

  • cecy393
    by cecy393
    April 18, 2013 at 2:27 PM
    It is scary just be cautious. After my ex husband and I separated I didn't date for about 7months ams when I met my now husband who is awesome ams I'm blessed with him. He was Understanding about not being sexually active we took it slow and now we've been married for four yearsI'm not saying we didn't have sex when we were dating but they were very few moments when that did happen.
    Good luck
  • RJC78
    by RJC78
    April 18, 2013 at 3:31 PM

    Been there!  I just decided to let go and lett it take it's own course and it has been great so far.  However, I knew him a couple of years before we started really talking and dating.  Try to relax and not worry about what might happen.  Enjoy it.  Even if you get hurt down the road, at least you have known this happiness.

  • RJC78
    by RJC78
    April 18, 2013 at 3:42 PM

     

    This.  Pretty much exactly my situation.  Except DD and I had known him a couple of years before we started dating. 

    Quoting freckles91:

    The same thing happened with me, i was afraid to get hurt when i met my boyfriend first. He met my son from the word go, and though some people might dissaggree with this, i also had no choice as he goes everywhere with me! For me though it was the best approach! It meant that he was fully aware of what he was getting into! There was no point in me meeting him without my son for months and him having a different view of what my life was like! he was landed down in the middle of reality! 

    I stressed overhow fast things were moving with us and that got me nowhere except a one way trip to stressville! So i stopped looking too far forward and stopped living in  the past and started taking every day as it came, and things are still working out :) He knows and undertstands how demanding being a single parent can be, and helps with EVERYTHING even when he doesnt have too! Obviously find out how he feels with regard to ur child and make sure he is aware that ur child always comes first, but dont forget to be happy yourself :)


     

  • JTE11
    by JTE11
    April 18, 2013 at 3:46 PM

    It's not a bad thing to fall for someone. All you have to do is keep using your brain and purposefully take it slow. The presence of feelings for someone doesn't mean you still can't take it slow, be careful, not get to intimate too quickly, and in general respect both of yourselves (and your LO) by not taking feelings as an indication that you should be closer sooner. It's Ok to fall for someone, it's not Ok to let those feelings rather than your mind guide what you do from here. You haven't been out of a relationship for very long and neither has he, and I would be willing to bet neither of you have come to a peace with all of the issues with your exes in such a short amount of time and are still carry some kind of emotional baggage so dating right now might not be the best idea in general because you may literally fall for the first guy you meet who isn't like your ex. I'm not saying not to date, I'm just saying to have some idea that the emotional position you're in is a vulnerable one, and if you find yourself falling for someone so quickly that would set of some alarms to back it off and either cool it entirely or take it very, very slowly. It would be too easy to get involved too quickly and then have yet another ex and breakup. Your Lo is so very young and needs you more than you need to be finding someone else right now so acknowledge the feelings but don't let them pull you in a direction you don't need to be going right now.

  • childofGod995
    April 18, 2013 at 6:46 PM

    take it slow or you just might lose him totally. being patient is hard, but i have been where you are and i eventually got hurt.

  • Sbo
    by Sbo
    April 18, 2013 at 7:46 PM
    There is no hope unless you want to course pain to his family
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