Advice for Moms

momofsunshine77
Any Counselors?
March 29, 2013 at 9:24 AM
My DH grew up with abuse in the home. He was abuesed, he watched his mother get abused, and was yelled at A LOT. He is always saying I am yelling when I am not. For EXAMPLE: I call his name from the other end of the house and he comes out angry and says stop yelling at me. And I am like I am not yelling. Or another EXAMPLE: I talk louder because the TV is blaring or whatever and he says I am yelling - and I am not. Another thing he does is he says I am freaking out when I am not as well. For EXAMPLE: If the kids spill something I will immediately clean it up and he is like stop freaking out, you're freaking out, etc. It makes me angry when he says I am doing something I am not. To me yelling is in anger and you are screaming so loud you lose your voice. and Freaking out is breathing hard and going OMG OMG OMG with eye wide open. It gets really frustrating because I feel like I can't move or say anything because he thinks i am freaking out or yelling. My question is - is there a way to get him to realize what yelling and freaking out is? I would really like some advice please. Thanks!!!

Replies

  • partingwhisper
    March 29, 2013 at 9:56 AM

    due to his childhood abuse he sounds very oversensitized concerning discipline and raising your voice to get the kids attention,. first off he should NEVER undermine you in front of the kids. that damages your relationship with  them. but it definitely sounds like you two need to go to counceling to work this out. 

  • atlmom2
    by atlmom2
    March 29, 2013 at 10:02 AM
    He needs anger management.
  • momofsunshine77
    March 29, 2013 at 10:13 AM
    He actually just got out of anger management classes. I told him he didn't learn a thing. LOL He was in them from last June until January this year. Counselor let him out.
    Quoting atlmom2:

    He needs anger management.

  • nuts4scouts
    March 29, 2013 at 10:20 AM

    Definately family counseling - at the least.

    He also needs individual counseling to help him deal with his childhood abuse issues. Anger management is just not going to work when the underlying issues are not addressed.

  • Bleacheddecay
    March 29, 2013 at 12:14 PM

    You can't fix him or get his childhood out of his head. Counseling could help y'all individually as a family and couple.

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