Advice for Moms

bmwlover
Advise for sister...........
January 9, 2013 at 10:48 AM

I told my sister Christine I was a member to Cafe mom and hopefully you guys have advise cuz I sure don't.  Her husband past away over 10 years ago. She got in touch with her boyfriend from 30 years ago on facebook. As she told me she has been having a mutal conversion withher EX boyrfriend  but he has a live in girlfriend for the past 3 years and her 17 year old son. I told Chrstine that shouldn't matter keep up the conversion and you never know what will happen. She's asking me for advise on how to continue her conversion because she doesn't want to talk about he past or sound like a child. She wants to have a mutal adult conversion with her EX. Christine told me she doesn't want anything more then a friendship. She lives in OK and he lives in CT she doesn't want to visit him and dispute his relationship.

I'm asking for your advise on what to tell Christine and how to continue her conversion with her EX.

What should they talk about ..weather boring....his job/her job done...they talked about how her EX met his present girlfriend, They talked about riding motorcyles...Yes I am close to my sister as you can tell bouncing I understand where she is coming from but I have no advise for her....

Replies

  • nuts4scouts
    January 9, 2013 at 11:09 AM

    A conversation in print is very similar to a conversation in person.

    What does she talk to people about? Can/does she hold face to face conversations?

    Since she is on Facebook, she obviously is not computer illiterate. Search the 'net for interesting stories, blogs, pictures, videos, etc, and talk about them. 

    Read a newspaper, and discuss what you read.

    Talk politics. Gun control is a hot topic right now.

    TV shows

    Movies

    Seriously, has she never talked with anyone before?

  • eoewan
    by eoewan
    January 9, 2013 at 11:38 AM

    This is so wrong. She shouldn't be conversing with her old ex because he is in a relationship. He is taken. Doesn't matter if it's just "friends" for now. Being that it's her ex, she is still harbouring feelings for him. She should get out and meet new friends - friends that aren't in a committed relationship. She might tell you she isn't interested in him in that way but why would she pick him? jmho

  • GremlinMom
    January 9, 2013 at 11:42 AM
    Exactly. You gave your sister terrible advice OP. Take her out, help her meet new people. That's what you should be doing, not acting like high schoolers.

    Quoting eoewan:

    This is so wrong. She shouldn't be conversing with her old ex because he is in a relationship. He is taken. Doesn't matter if it's just "friends" for now. Being that it's her ex, she is still harbouring feelings for him. She should get out and meet new friends - friends that aren't in a committed relationship. She might tell you she isn't interested in him in that way but why would she pick him? jmho

  • bmwlover
    January 9, 2013 at 1:12 PM

    Are you all serious? Whats wrong having an EX as a friend? I'm encouraging my sister to continue on its not like they live in the same state. In a serious relationship dam he's not married nor is my sister. Its not high school they are adults acting like adults No one is cheating on each other Like I mentioned before what is wrong being friends with an EX not unless you don't trust yourself.

  • Miss-tearious
    January 9, 2013 at 1:26 PM

    Agreed 100%!

    Quoting eoewan:

    This is so wrong. She shouldn't be conversing with her old ex because he is in a relationship. He is taken. Doesn't matter if it's just "friends" for now. Being that it's her ex, she is still harbouring feelings for him.


  • Roo1234
    by Roo1234
    January 9, 2013 at 2:10 PM

    If she is struggling to find commonalities, it may mean that the relationship has passed it usefulness to them. Just because we knew someone in our past, doens't mean they belong in our present life.

    They could discuss shows, movies, books, hobbies, current events, religion, the possibilities are nearly infinite.

    The bigger question is why isn't she trying to meet someone new and closer, rather than pursuing a friendship with him?

  • Aishamusty
    January 9, 2013 at 3:44 PM

    I don't see any big deal in just talking you talk about everything around you. Dogs flower, whether, politics 

    Quoting nuts4scouts:

    A conversation in print is very similar to a conversation in person.

    What does she talk to people about? Can/does she hold face to face conversations?

    Since she is on Facebook, she obviously is not computer illiterate. Search the 'net for interesting stories, blogs, pictures, videos, etc, and talk about them. 

    Read a newspaper, and discuss what you read.

    Talk politics. Gun control is a hot topic right now.

    TV shows

    Movies

    Seriously, has she never talked with anyone before?


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