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saysmom
Question for one that co-sleep?
by saysmom
January 7, 2013 at 12:58 PM

I have two kids and have never co-slept. But I have a friend that sleeps with her 3 1/2 year old daughter and her hubby sleeps in their 8 year old sons room. They started this when she had the 3 1/2 year old. They have had some really bad marital problems since then. And I got to wondering for those that co-sleep, when do you have sex? Because I know that has been one of the issues with my friends marriage. Not trying to cause a debate or anything but just wondering when you find time for intimacy wether it be snuggling, kissing or sex. 

Replies

  • LMenkes
    by LMenkes
    January 7, 2013 at 1:09 PM

    We would put our daughter to sleep in her bassinett or crib when we wanted some time, or showers, or the couch, lol. But one of my main things I made sure of with both of my girls, they will sleep anywhere not in only one spot from the moment they came home on as well as vaccumes and other noises during sleep.

  • SewingMamaLele
    January 7, 2013 at 1:11 PM

    My kids always started in their own bed and then came to ours sometime during the night... that leaves plenty of time for sex... PLUS, we do have a shower, a kitchen, a living room AND a hot tub... only having sex in the bed gets kinda boring.  

  • Dvegas
    by Dvegas
    January 7, 2013 at 1:16 PM

    My husband and i have a 13 month old and I have been co sleeping with him up until two weeks ago. During the past 13months me and my husband did not have time alone  to chat let alone have sex. I was one of those moms who want to put the needs of her child first and that means letting them wean from co sleeping on there own and telling my husband to just deal with it this is what happens when you have a child. unfortunately it took a toll on our marriage and we argued all the time.  We finally were able to get our baby into his own crib which has helped our marriage tremendously.  I now know what was best for our marriage was to stop co sleeping and to make our marriage my first priority and in turn with us having a strong marriage we will be able to provide our child with a happy home instead of one with his parent bickering all the time.

  • saysmom
    by saysmom
    January 7, 2013 at 1:37 PM

    This is why my hubby and I agreed from the beginning to not start co-sleeping. And not that I don't put my children first, but unhappy marriage can make for unhappy children. So it was important to us to still remain as "us"! And I just always figured children would sleep better in their own rooms. There wouldn't be the noise of the parents, alarm clocks etc. glad everything worked out for you!

  • piwife
    by piwife
    January 7, 2013 at 1:50 PM
    I have 3 kids and have always bedshare with my kids... when we only had one we had sex everywhere. Now with 3. We put our 8 mth old in the bed and we have sex eithr in the shower or floor. Or we put her in the swing (living room) and we go to the bedroom. And trus me we have a lot of sex. Usually my dh ends up in dd or ds bed in the middle of the night and I bedshare with my youngest dd and sometimes another one ends up in my bed. We have a very happy marriage.
  • sarahfaith123
    January 7, 2013 at 2:01 PM

    what we do is like partial co sleeping. lay down next to child until he's asleep at night about 730 or 8, if we are tired, take a nap with him or one or both of us sleep in there all night. once he's asleep he stays asleep until about 2 am or he sleeps all night until 6am. anyway while he's asleep we go in our bedroom for intimacy or downstairs to talk, watch tv or cook or whatever. so sometimes we sleep in our bed alone too, sometimes esp if he is sick or cries a lot ds comes into our bed or we go to his bed with him around midnight, 1 or 2. so it's like the best of both worlds. at nap i'm the only one here and i lay with ds till he's asleep or take little nap with him if i need it. but it's very nice, i love it, nice little warm toddler next to ya....not for everyone though

  • piwife
    by piwife
    January 7, 2013 at 2:02 PM
    By the way its not bedsharing the causes the problem is lack of trying... 3 kids here have bedshare with all of them. Me and dh we hug, cuddle and spend time together. Sex, hugs, kisses and cuddles are not limited to the bedroom..
  • piwife
    by piwife
    January 7, 2013 at 2:03 PM
    So you guys had zero sex in 13 mts?


    Quoting Dvegas:

    My husband and i have a 13 month old and I have been co sleeping with him up until two weeks ago. During the past 13months me and my husband did not have time alone  to chat let alone have sex. I was one of those moms who want to put the needs of her child first and that means letting them wean from co sleeping on there own and telling my husband to just deal with it this is what happens when you have a child. unfortunately it took a toll on our marriage and we argued all the time.  We finally were able to get our baby into his own crib which has helped our marriage tremendously.  I now know what was best for our marriage was to stop co sleeping and to make our marriage my first priority and in turn with us having a strong marriage we will be able to provide our child with a happy home instead of one with his parent bickering all the time.


  • Mom2Just1
    January 7, 2013 at 2:28 PM
    We only co sleep for a couple of months. We have sex in the shower , living room, etc. we are creative.
  • Dvegas
    by Dvegas
    January 7, 2013 at 4:29 PM


    Quoting piwife:

    I have 3 kids and have always bedshare with my kids... when we only had one we had sex everywhere. Now with 3. We put our 8 mth old in the bed and we have sex eithr in the shower or floor. Or we put her in the swing (living room) and we go to the bedroom. And trus me we have a lot of sex. Usually my dh ends up in dd or ds bed in the middle of the night and I bedshare with my youngest dd and sometimes another one ends up in my bed. We have a very happy marriage.


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