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Muchacho
When does it stop?
January 5, 2013 at 12:23 AM
So I have a generally speaking sweet loving child... Until lately that is. He just turned three and as of lately would rather scream, kick and tell me no than listen. This is completely and entirely out of character for him until lately. He is in daycare as we both work full time, and this attitude is quite sporadic. He can go for days and be nice, then all of a sudden something sets him off when he is being punished and it is an all out war for at least 30 minutes to an hr. I am at a loss. I have tried time out, silent treatment, talking it out, trying to work through the issue... Nothing helps! Any advice?

Replies

  • frndlyfn
    January 5, 2013 at 12:51 AM

    So when he is disciplined is when the fit starts up?  Keep a consistent discipline routine for him no matter what.   Perhaps those days he had not eaten enough or was extra tired.  Those are 2 things that can still set off my 6 yr old and it started about age 2 .  How do they react to the fits at daycare?

  • AuntFib
    by AuntFib
    January 5, 2013 at 11:45 AM

    Sometimes, a 3-year old needs to test his boundaries as he's trying to develop his own personality and independence...  When he is being punished, do you discuss with him what he's punished for, and why?  Not just a "You're going to time out for throwing your toy", but explain why throwing his toy is grounds for punishment.  Even if you've discussed this time and time again, discuss it every time, or ask him if he understands the "why" and have him tell you.  

    I don't know if that helps you at all, but just offering a suggestion and a thought.  Good luck and lots of patience wished for you.

  • robyann
    by robyann
    January 5, 2013 at 11:53 AM

     Sometimes 3 year olds get frustrated with their own inability to do some things, either physically or verbally. This can cause them to get angry. It is ok for him to feel anger, it is how he shows it that is imporant. Teach him how to react when he feels angry or frustrated. How to step back and take a deep breath and ask for help or try again. GL

  • amonkeymom
    January 5, 2013 at 4:16 PM

    Welcome to the group!  Sounds like the terrifying threes for sure.  lol

    Quoting Muchacho:

    So I have a generally speaking sweet loving child... Until lately that is. He just turned three and as of lately would rather scream, kick and tell me no than listen. This is completely and entirely out of character for him until lately. He is in daycare as we both work full time, and this attitude is quite sporadic. He can go for days and be nice, then all of a sudden something sets him off when he is being punished and it is an all out war for at least 30 minutes to an hr. I am at a loss. I have tried time out, silent treatment, talking it out, trying to work through the issue... Nothing helps! Any advice?


  • DaniandTom
    January 5, 2013 at 5:34 PM

    When does it stop? Oh around 37...

    Seriously, each child is different. Have you sat down and asked him what's wrong on those days? Perhaps asking him on a good day why sometimes he gets like that? 

  • Bmat
    by Bmat
    January 5, 2013 at 6:16 PM

    If you haven't already, tell him that when he is ready to settle down and talk in his inside voice that you will be glad to talk with him. When you punish,  be sure to explain why and why there is a punishment for this. Don't back down from punishing-  never make a threat that you are unwilling to keep. There's no rule, after all, that everyone will always be sweet and loving, everyone gets tired and frustrated.

  • Lindalou907
    January 5, 2013 at 11:59 PM

    It's not unusual for 3 year olds to act up like that, it will pass. Just keep modeling the good behavior that you want and praise him when he does show patience and maturity. Keep your discipline consistent even when you're out in public, you can do a "time out" anywhere.

  • AM-BRAT
    by AM-BRAT
    January 6, 2013 at 3:12 AM



    Quoting DaniandTom:

    When does it stop? Oh around 37...

    Seriously, each child is different. Have you sat down and asked him what's wrong on those days? Perhaps asking him on a good day why sometimes he gets like that? 


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