Advice for Moms
I have an 17 month old, amazing son whom I've been fortunate enough to stay home with his entire life since recently. I started a day job part time and he goes to daycare. Its been about a month now and the place is great, they love my son, he seems to like it, and most important I finally found someone I trust to leave my son with!!! Anywho, when he gets home from day care or any other time I leave him for long periods of time, he wants nothing to do with me, like he's punishing me for leaving him for so long!!!
Has anyone else had this problem!??????
All I wanna do is hug and kids him when I see him, so it breaks my heart that it takes him a little bit to wanna do the same!!
The kid gets more love than you can imagine, so i m really trying NOT to take this personal, any thoughts??? :-)
Replies
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It is the age truthfully. They are becoming more independant from mommy and have a huge world to play in. Try to establish a hello routine and a good bye routine which is a hug, kiss and i love you in less than 2 minutes total time. That way you can get the hug but not cut into his "me"time LOL. When he is at daycare I am sure he is surrounded by others so he may need that time after to get used to the more quiet home and shake off any excessive sensations from being around other children.
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Here is your problem. <<<All I wanna do is hug and kids him when I see him>>> He's not "punishing" you. He's just getting older. He's been playing, and then you sweep in, take him away from what he's doing, and slobber all over him. He's NOT thinking, "Here's Mommy whom I missed for 10 minutes this morning." He IS thinking, "GET OFF ME, & let me play." Back off a little. Just be normal. He'll suddenly recognise you, and then he'll tolerate a hug. And don't forget, he's moving into the "terrible 2's already, also
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That's normal. Try not to get upset about it. He'll warm up after a short while.
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Sounds pretty normal and the age he is unfortunately. I'm sorry you are going through it though.
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That's normal and a part of it is his age. He's slowly trying to assert his independence. Like another poster stated, establish a quick "hello" and "goodbye" routine with him. I know that immediately after picking him up, you want to hug and kiss and hang out but give him some space and he'll come to you. It's not that he wants nothing to do with you or is punishing you but rather showing that he's independent.
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It's normal..he's just getting bigger. One of those hard facts of life for Mom. Plus he's in daycare around other kids and people so he's probably learning more how to socialize, etc. Hang in there.
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Quoting frndlyfn:
It is the age truthfully. They are becoming more independant from mommy and have a huge world to play in. Try to establish a hello routine and a good bye routine which is a hug, kiss and i love you in less than 2 minutes total time. That way you can get the hug but not cut into his "me"time LOL. When he is at daycare I am sure he is surrounded by others so he may need that time after to get used to the more quiet home and shake off any excessive sensations from being around other children.
The more our kids get exposed to other larger communities than home,the more they're likely to act weird. However do the hugs and kisses when he's going and do the same when he gets back,he'll catch up. -
Its his age, wait till he really gets into the two's and three's. Then you will see independence and things to make your hair stand on end. I had a climber. Once when he was at home with his Dad and brother, the D-A-D left them in the house while he was mowing the lawn, Dylan snuck out and climbed the pear tree in the backyard and slipped and was hanging by his hands, saying help Daddy help. If the hubs wasn't already bald, all his hair woould have fallen out. The hubs had to climb a spindly fruit tree that was about 50 feet in the air, of course the kid was at the top. Dad was over 250 lbs.
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It's normal
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He needs to protect himself from the pain of losing you. Some kids do that by not reconnecting at the end of the day.
Be there for him, and let him take his time to warm back up to you...