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kimlogan2
punishment for a 12 year ds
December 28, 2012 at 10:30 PM
So my son went to a friends house and when he got home he told me other kids were making fun of him teasing like he does with the other boys and he got mad and punched there door left a hole in it. I talked with him told him he got a taste of his own medicine see here with the other kids he calls them names makes them mad but they don't go punching things and we have tried a lot of things to get him to stop cussing and teasing the other kids. So after his dad heard what he did he grounded him for 1 month and took the tv and x box out of his room and is making him go find out what he can do to pay back for the door he put a hole in. I agree with my husbands punishment but do you think it was to harsh just right or would you have done more just wondering. The only thing is by removing the tv and x box from his room is that he shares a room with his 2 brothers. I know the boys can do the xbox and stuff in the living room and watch the tv in our room if its not bed time. Also just wonering how do you make the 2 boys fell like they are not punished because everything is out of their rooms. Thanks all

Replies

  • frndlyfn
    December 28, 2012 at 10:46 PM

    I think that is enough for the crime unless the other parents want to press charges for destruction of property.  That may scare him straight.   Explain to them that they need to work as a team so if one team member messes up they all will be on restriction for video games since it will be in living room.

  • hollydaze1974
    December 28, 2012 at 11:05 PM
    You know, my son gets more lectures when some other kid does something, i have very little behavior issues with him! Lol.

    This is a perfect example to teach the younger ones what happens when you royally screw up.

    As you said, they still access, but no where in any child rearing book have i read that child must have technological access im thier own room. Who knows.... The younger ones may mutiny and tell big brother to get his act together.

    I see nothing wrong with the punishment, I think a good talk with the younger ones about "see what happens when you are disrespectful to others or thier property?" may save you the same type of behavior from them later on.
  • sabrtooth1
    December 28, 2012 at 11:52 PM

    Kids do NOT need TV & Xbox in their bedrooms, period.  That stuff should ONLY be in the family room, so you can supervise what they are watching, and how long they are glued to the Xbox.  Kids should be spending time with the family, and the family should be watching age appropriate programs with their kids.  NO WONDER he is swearing, punching things, and insulting other children. The LAST thing this out-of-control child needs,  is more exposure to violent TV and computer games.  I also think you or your husband should PERSONALLY take him by the arm over to the other people's home, APOLOGIZE for damaging their home, and find out FROM THEM, what it will take to repair the damage.  Then make sure he repays them.  Close, personal, ongoing supervision will be necessary to control his behavior. 

  • PEEK05
    by PEEK05
    December 28, 2012 at 11:53 PM

    My oldest is only 3 so I don't really know, but that does sound like it is a good punishment.

  • kimlogan2
    December 29, 2012 at 1:36 AM
    1st of all we do watch age apporite things at home with our kids Did you ever think that I only gave you half the story cause I don't like sharing my whole life with every one so before insult me on how I am doing with my kids here is more of my story. The guy I am married to is his step father he comes home every year from his dads with a bad temper this year has been worse then any other year his real dad has no punshment at all for him Me and the husband both know what games he is playing on the x box and I watch his time on it and when I tell him or any of my kids to get off they do anc I do check and make sure they are staying off. I DON'T LOCK MY KIDS IN THEIR ROOMS AND IGNORE THEM WE DO HAVE LOTS OF FAMILY TIME. IF you read my post all the way you have seen that he is going to see what he needs to do take care of the damage and apologize for his behavior. He sees his real dad cuss and mistreat his mom every summer and I am working on things in that nature there is NO cussing at all allowed in this house me nor his stepdad cuss I take him to church so even good children go bad. Other then the cussing at the other kids and this only time punching somebodys else stuff he really is a good kid but He does hang around kids at school and you don't think kids hear stuff from other kids at school. So I am glad you are the perfect parent and your kids do no wrong. So just to let you know most my kids are in bed asleep and the rest of us is watching ALF or is that to violent for you next we will watch 7th heaven when my kids are at school and my husband is at work then yes I get reall crazy and watch Dr quinn medicine women sorry my kids see that one sometimes to. So you didn't even know what we watch or how the house is ran you just assumed it was filled with gun games and a lot of violence don't assume anything. But when all the kids are asleep or at school I will watch some things that I won't let them watch and I won't blame games and crap on everything my kids do and when good kids go bad the parents blame themselves and it's not always the parents fault even the kids that like yours can't even pee without holding their hand they do rebel and parents ask why all any of us do as parents can do is do our best and ask for help when we need it my kids by the way don't just go and do whatever when they want.


    Quoting sabrtooth1:

    Kids do NOT need TV & Xbox in their bedrooms, period.  That stuff should ONLY be in the family room, so you can supervise what they are watching, and how long they are glued to the Xbox.  Kids should be spending time with the family, and the family should be watching age appropriate programs with their kids.  NO WONDER he is swearing, punching things, and insulting other children. The LAST thing this out-of-control child needs,  is more exposure to violent TV and computer games.  I also think you or your husband should PERSONALLY take him by the arm over to the other people's home, APOLOGIZE for damaging their home, and find out FROM THEM, what it will take to repair the damage.  Then make sure he repays them.  Close, personal, ongoing supervision will be necessary to control his behavior. 


  • notjstasocermom
    December 29, 2012 at 11:15 AM

    he is bullying for a reason, he needs counseling to find the root of the problem. 

    as for the door, he would be paying for it.

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