So, I`ll try to cut the long story shorter - my dad`s was and still is an alcoholic. He left me when I was 2 months old. By now for 32 years I`ve seen him no more than 10 times. I grew up in poverty and he never helped. As long as I remember all he gave me for my whole life was a pair of jeans and a box of chewing gums when I was in 4th grade. He never gave me any attention, advice or emotional support as well. I don`t blame or judge him, he made his choices or may be he` s a sick man, doctors consider the dependences as sickness, or may be my mom led him to his situation. I don`t know. All I know for sure is my parent`s faults are not mine, but I suffered from them for the greater part of my life. Now I have my own family and it`s the only thing that matters for me.
The thing is being a lawyer and having an access to the local property register I realised that my dad has donated his summer cottage to my cousin, i.e. to his brother`s daughter. He didn`t buy the cottage, it`s a heritage from his parents, i.e. my grand parents. Probably I`ll have to mention they were in solidarity with my dad`s divorce and I have never seen my grandma, I`ve seen grandpa 2 or 3 times, including a time I met him on the street and he didn`t recognize me. According to our legislation, in case of a donation me and my brother we have a preserved part from the heritage. Means if dad has sold the cottage then we could do nothing, but since he made a donnation we could try to cancel it in court and ask for our preserved part. Such a case would be easy for me and ten to one I`d win. Then the cottage would be mine and my brother`s with equal parts. But I`m not sure what to do. On one hand I have everything and don`t need desperately the cottage. Plus I don`t want anything from a family who didn`t care about me. On other hand I have a daughter and I want her to have everything I was deprived of. I`ve already provided her with our own home and some commercial properties, but as every mother I want her to have everything. I don`t want her to struggle as I did. On third hand my brother has nothing and would never go to court to ask for his part because he can not afford paying neither the court fee, neither a lawyer other than myself. Not that I even think of asking him a fee.
So, this is the situation. I don`t know what to do. I don`t wan`t to be greedy, I want to be a good Christian. What would you do in my situation?
November 23, 2012 at 3:48 AM
I wouldn't pursue it in court either, however I think you should, if at all possible, ask your dad to explain why he is leaving it to your cousin. I think this whole situation drove another stake through your heart and that's why you are thinking about taking it to court. I'm sorry he has caused so much pain and even at this time in your life when everything else seems to have fallen into place he still manage to hurt you. You need to get to a place where you can forgive him and move on. Good luck to you, in whatever you decide.