Advice for Moms

jcsmommy09
do you think its fair
November 13, 2012 at 9:28 PM

THAT MY SON'S FATHERS SIDE OF THE FAMILY THREATENS ME EVERY OTHER DAY TO TAKE CUSTODY OF MY SON BECAUSE I ALLOW MY FIANCEE'S FAMILY TO BE IN HIS LIFE??? AND TO TELL ME THAT IM A POS AND THAT MY FIANCEE WONT AMOUNT TO ANYTHING AND THAT HE WILL NEVER BE MY SONS FATHER YRS U KNOW MY SON ONLY HAS ONE FATHER BUT HE WAS MURDERED AND MY SON NEEDS A FATHER FIGURE IN HIS LIFE AND WILL ALWAYS KNOW WHO IS DAD IS... OHH AND NOT TO MINCION MY FIANCEE IS 22 AND OWNS HIS OWN BUSSINESS AND IS THE CO OWNER OF ANOTHER ONE 

Replies

  • frndlyfn
    November 13, 2012 at 9:48 PM

    first of all do not yell in a forum..... second of all.  They have no legal grounds to get custody of your child.  I would talk to a family lawyer to double check that though.  Then tell them if they continue to be hostile, you will take away any visits.   Most grandparents laws pertain to if the parents are divorced and witholding visits.

  • offrdngal
    November 13, 2012 at 9:52 PM

    They need to back off and mind their own damn business. If they want to fight for visitation, they can...but they would have to prove you unfit, if they want custody.

  • jcsmommy09
    November 13, 2012 at 9:53 PM

    i have limited his visits and they tell him im being mean and that its all my fault he cant go over there as much anymore.. and she threw papers in my face trying to get me to sign them so she could get rights and thats when it all happened because i refused the way i see it is if her son didnt want to have rights over his son why should his parents.. and also in my state grandparents have no rights at all

  • englebabies
    November 13, 2012 at 9:54 PM

    The fiancee and his family are part of your DS's life now and his paternal family should understand that. Have you tried talking to them and letting them know that it is ok for you to move on with your life. They may still be greiving and are venting on you because you have moved on. But it is not ok to threaten to have someones child taken away for no just reason. 

  • JasonsMom2007
    November 13, 2012 at 9:54 PM

    Wow, I never realized how important using proper capitalization was until this post lol.

    No, it's not right.  I would tell them to back off or you will get a lawyer.

  • firespurity
    November 13, 2012 at 9:56 PM

    Why was he murdered? was anyone in the family involved? Was it poor decisions or one of those things that just happens to good people?

  • englebabies
    November 13, 2012 at 9:56 PM

    Ok in that case you may have to limit visits even more or stop allowing altoghether. I am sorry this is happening to you. 


    Quoting jcsmommy09:

    i have limited his visits and they tell him im being mean and that its all my fault he cant go over there as much anymore.. and she threw papers in my face trying to get me to sign them so she could get rights and thats when it all happened because i refused the way i see it is if her son didnt want to have rights over his son why should his parents.. and also in my state grandparents have no rights at all


  • jcsmommy09
    November 13, 2012 at 9:57 PM

    i have tried talking to them but they tell me in just young and stupid and dont know what im doing yes i may be 23 but i know what im doing and know my ds is ok because he loves my fiancee and is always asking to talk to him or cuddled up on the couch with him when they get done playing 

  • jcsmommy09
    November 13, 2012 at 9:59 PM

    him and his gf well one of them he had 3 at the time were drinking him only one beer and her god only know how much and she took 3 xanax and got mad because he wanned to leave and shot him point blank in the chest 

  • robyann
    by robyann
    November 13, 2012 at 10:04 PM

     There are dealing with the death of their son/brother. They feel the need to make sure his child is taken care of they way they think he should be. It's hard for them, but he is your son, you have to take care of him, and if they continue to act like this around him, it would be in his best interest to not be around them so much.

    My oldest dd's father died when she was 14 months old. There were issues with his family after, they also said they wanted to take her from me, not because I wasn't treating her right, but in a weird attempt to get their son/brother back. Sadly, I had to withdraw from them for a few years. It was just too much for everyone involved and I had to think of my dd's best interest. I mean of course she would need her grandparents and aunts and uncles but not if they were always talking about her father and not thinking about what was best for her. Just always talking how he wouldn't want things this way or that way. After I pulled away they would see us maybe once a year, eventually when I was getting remarried they asked me if she was calling him daddy, and she was, she was 4 by then, and she was 14 months when her father died. She didn't remember him, but I had always told her about him, so she knew of him, but she just didn't have that connection. She was close to my new dh, and he loved her and he was a dad to her. They didnt' like this but it was what was best for her, so I withdrew again. They didn't have much to do with her her whole life, now she's grown and they have contacted her but she's not real interested in seeing them.

    I'm sorry that your child has lost their father, but you have to move on and you have to make a life here for your child. It may hurt his family,but your main concern is your child .GL

Advice for Moms