Advice for Moms
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I am not sure. I waited and spaced my kids out 6 years. I had a brother 20 months younger than me and was insanely jealous (according to my mother). My son has yet to show jealousy, loves being involved, and really understands what is going on. Good luck.
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Your daughter will be two when you have your second, if you get pregnant according to plan. Two year olds naturally throw fits, and so I don't thing your husband's cousin's wife's child was acting out due to the new baby per se. That's just how two year olds are. Once you conceive, involve your daughter in the pregnancy. Have her feel your belly when the baby is moving, tell her she's going to be an awesome big sister, and generally just let her be a big part of the experience. Good luck to you!
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You can't keep your child from behaving naturally the way he/she is going to behave. She s a toddler not a mineature adult. She is going to behave like a toddler. Yes she wants mommy to pick her up, because she is a toddler, whehter you want her to behave like a toddler or not isn't her problem, that is your's. She doesn't understand you being pregnant, she doesn't understand the reason attention is being shifted from her to the pregnancy and soon to the new baby, she doesn't understand sharing. The only thing I can suggest if you don't want to go through having to deal with a jealousk frightened toddler, is to not get pregnant until she is older and can understand.