Advice for Moms
Okay. So I feel like my husband and I have had our kids way to close! We origanally wanted 3 kids, 3 years apart each. Well, we are currently pregnant with twins... I'm not sure how our other kids are handling this pregnancy. Rylan(8) seems to be doing the best, he is excited to have another brother and sister. Gaven(6) is starting to be really clingy onto me! Avery(3) she is starting not to sleep in her room because "I don't want to miss the babies being born momma!" And Skylie(18 months) started peeing her pants all over again. We are back to pull ups! All of this started when the kids found out I was expecting twins! I am so overwhelmed with stress. Any advice on how I can get my kids to accept the new babies? Not only that but keep them in their same routine one the babies get here?! We only have 14 weeks left!
Replies
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You will figure it out momma! Just take it one day at a time :) I do Not know anything about having a lot of kids but I hope someday I will.. Good luck! Make sure you take time for yourself and have lots of help! Hopefully you are close with family and friends
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I want this excitement in my family... we may not even have anymore :(
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dont expect to keep them in their same routine for the first couple weeks..it's an exciting time!!..you aren't going to be in your same routine either, and will need all the help you can get...all you can do is try to keep the house on some kind of schedule for your own sanity's sake...make a plan with hubs about ways the kids can help out. As far as the little ones, regression is normal, and most likely will continue until the hullaballoo over the babies has died down and you can give them more one on one with it again. Make a plan with your 3yr old about when you are going to the hospital, as i am sure she is scared of having mommy leave. Let her know she WILL be able to come see you, talk to you on the phone, etc...
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It WILL be ok and its completely normal for the kids to do what they are going. They know a change is coming. Don't freak out. -
Try to keep your routines. Also, I would try to include them all individually or even making decisions together on things for the babies. New outfits, decorations for the room, toys etc. Let them know they are needed and wanted to help out with the little one!
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First, take a deep breath! I know what you're going through - I also have 6 kids,and my youngest 2 are also twins. Everyone WILL adjust! Trying to get your 18mo old to get back into the potty training routine right now is just going to be frustrating for both of you - just relax about it a little. Definitely encourage her to use the potty regularly, but let her wear the pull ups for now so you don't have more laundry and frustration! Tell your 3 yo that she will be the first to know when the babies are ready to come out - even let her come to one of your quicker dr visits so she can hear the heartbeats. Your 6yo is old enough to understand what more babies mean, so just take a few minutes everyday (I usually do it at the end of the day) and sit and talk to him about his day. Actually, that's one of my best pieces of advice - take the time at bedtime every night with each kid - it doesn't have to be a 1/2 hour, just a few minutes for each of them will go a long way!
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I have a lot of kids, too. I can tell you that 1) A three year-old will come up w/ any reason to get into your bed and 2) 18 mo old is too early for potting training. I'm kind of a hard-ass about these things, but I would send the three year-old to bed and tell her to not get back up. When you have a lot of kids, co-sleeping is not really a viable option (IMO anyway.) I think the kids are picking up on your stress about the situation. Children can be very intuitive and manipulative. Act as if the new babies are no big deal, and don't let on that you're stressed...see if that helps!
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First of all, Congrats on the twins!
Second of all, I have 4 kids and I know when I was pregnant with number four, I worried about the impact on my older children but my older children adjusted fine : )
I used to nanny for a family who had 4 kids and she became pregnant with twins. Her youngest was 18 months when the twins were born. The children adjusted fine : )
I wouldn't worry so much, just don't be afraid to ask for help and take every chance you can get to spend time with your children (I'm sure you already know this).
Best of luck to you
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Alot of kids regress when new babies are coming. Be as consistent as possible and take it slow. I love your childrens names! -
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Quoting LancesMom:
All of this sounds normal. Just be as consistant with them as you can, and give them some one on one time before the babies come if you can. Let them know you love them very much!