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My Adhd daughter
August 17, 2012 at 1:15 AM

My daughter is 4 years old. She was recently diagnosed with Adhd. She is on concerta and zoloft for it. She still is very bad, She rips things apart, back talks, everything along them lines,. I have tried about everything too try too control her. I dont hit my child, I try other punishments. I've tried time outs, taking her favorite toys, no television, and took away things that she likes too do the most like going to the park and riding her bike, Nothing is working and I ran out of ideas. Does anyone have any suggestions??


  • CoeyG
    by CoeyG
    August 17, 2012 at 1:17 AM

    Have you tried being consistent rather than constanly changing the discipline?  

  • Pr0udm0mmy_0f2
    August 17, 2012 at 1:24 AM


  • TempestRayne
    August 17, 2012 at 10:56 AM

     What kind of routine does she have? Some kids wth ADHD need a very strict routine in addition to medication therapy to overcome adhd obstacles. Futhermore, concerta can cause some unpleasant side effects-headaches, stomach pains, insomnia...She may still be acting this wasy because she doesn't fel well.

    She may also not have adhd. there are a lot of disorders that look like adhd at this age and aren't. Sensory processing disorder, bipolar disorder, depression.

    In any case, she may also not have been on the meds long enough to notice a change in behaviour. She learned to act this way over four years. Starting meds isn't going to change her overnight or even in a few weeks or months. It is going to take patience, getle guiding, and possible behaviour therapy.

  • Mry
    by Mry
    August 17, 2012 at 11:07 AM
    Jeez that's alot of drugs for a4 year old have you tried professional help together? You say she is so bad that is a red flag, she's acting out and your only hurting her by giving her drugs. I have an adhd husband and son it is very challenging at times but finding ways to deal could help alot. Find a therapist get help for you and dd! You cannotexpect to control her she is a person
  • LindaClement
    August 17, 2012 at 11:54 AM

    I'm pretty sure there aren't any drugs that will stop a child from being a child. You know: immature, opposed to being controlled by other people, objecting to having her stuff stolen...

    It appears that you have proven that attempting to control children is ineffective. Perhaps you could look into some of the gentler, more effective relationship-building techniques that create an atmosphere where the child is internally-motivated to fit in, cooperate and behave?

    I would suggets start by reading Alfie Kohn's Unconditional Parenting.

  • smile357
    August 17, 2012 at 12:10 PM

    Before she was put on the meds what were her behaviors like? I can kind of understand the ADHD med but what I'm having a problem with is the zoloft. I agree with TempestRayne, there may be other underlying things going on there also. Linda's suggestion I agree with as well, I read a lot of different books on this subject. Sometimes they can help.

    If you'd like you can pm me.

  • HyperMom38
    August 17, 2012 at 12:54 PM

    1. ADHD is a condition that the child has- it is not a sign of bad parenting.  (This is for all you judgemental mom's who have NO CLUE what it is like to be the parent of a child with ADHD, yet feel the need to open your mouth and insert your foot with your unhelpfull comments on the subject :)

    2. Be consistent- set the rules and the punishments ahead of time- let her know what they are and then enforce it when she breaks the rules.  I use the "calm down corner" method that the American Super Nanny Deborah Tillman came up with.  It works.

    3. Make sure she gets enough exercise.  The more energy she expends on playing the less she has to expend on the bad stuff.

    4. Go back to her doctor and explain what is happening- she may not be on the correct dose yet and it may take a while to get there.

    5. Keep meals nutritious- no fast food- try not to feed her pre-processed foods and watch the amount of sugar and also watch out for red dyes- they contribute to the hyperness.  If your Grandmother wouldn't recognize it- don't feed it to her!!

    6. Limit electronics exposure- TV, computers, games etc.

    7. Keep a very simple and structured environment- make a daily schedule and stick to it.  ADD/ ADHD kids respond best to routines.

    Hope this helps.  Hugs Momma.  If you need anything just message me!

  • snowangel1979
    August 17, 2012 at 1:01 PM
    Did she have the mood swings before the meds, is this new behavior popping up.
    It could be because of the meds.

    I'm sorry but that's a lot of meds for a 4 year old. How did they diagnose ADHD.
    They normally don't diagnose ADHD untill 6+ years old. Did you go to a physiologis or just a doctor.
    4 year olds are a handful and don't know self control or how to properly verbalize they're emotions. Four year olds rip things apart and back talk and act up. They are testing the limits.

    You don't see anything wrong with giving a 4 year old physiological altering drugs?
    Did you do any research on these drugs?
    Drugs should be a last result after trying other things.
    You can not drug a child to comply with the "rules". It may work short term but long term your in for trouble.
    I'm not meaning to bash but it sounds like your doctor is a quack for giving a 4 year old these meds.

    I'm the mother of 3 (possibly 4) children with ADHD.
  • Nicholy10
    August 17, 2012 at 1:02 PM

    Read Love &'s got some good strategies. 

    Offer choices rather than demands.

    Offer positive feedback and reinforcement when she's behaving well....give her extra attention or something to show her she's doing what you would like to see all the time. 

    Definitely get her into therapy to go along with meds, because meds alone don't tend to be effective. 

  • OHgirlinCA
    August 17, 2012 at 1:05 PM

     That behavior isn't necessarily related to her ADHD.  Not all ADHD kids have behavioral issues. 

    Was she like this before the medication?  Perhaps it is a side effect.  My son was very moody when he was on Vyvanse, but doesn't have any emotional issues on Adderall.  Different medications work for different individuals. 

    You have to be firm with her and have alot of structure and patience.  Be sure to focus on her positive behavior too and tell her when she's doing something good and how much you appreciate that.

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