FromAtoZ
FYI (if you're a teenage girl)
September 3, 2013 at 9:55 PM


Quote:

FYI (if you’re a teenage girl)

 

Dear girls,

I have some information that might interest you. Last night, as we sometimes do, our family sat around the dining-room table and looked through your social media photos.

We have teenage sons, and so naturally there are quite a few pictures of you lovely ladies to wade through. Wow – you sure took a bunch of selfies in your pajamas this summer!  Your bedrooms are so cute! Our eight-year-old daughter brought this to our attention, because with three older brothers who have rooms that smell like stinky cheese, she notices girly details like that.

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I think the boys notice other things. For one, it appears that you are not wearing a bra.

I get it – you’re in your room, so you’re heading to bed, right? But then I can’t help but notice the red carpet pose, the extra-arched back, and the sultry pout.  What’s up? None of these positions is one I naturally assume before sleep, this I know.

So, here’s the bit that I think is important for you to realize.  If you are friends with a Hall boy on Facebook or Instagram or Twitter, then you are friends with the whole Hall family.

Please understand this, also: we genuinely like keeping up with you. We enjoy seeing life through your unique and colorful lens – which is what makes your latest self-portrait so extremely unfortunate.

Those posts don’t reflect who you are! We think you are lovely and interesting, and usually very smart. But, we had to cringe and wonder what you were trying to do? Who are you trying to reach? What are you trying to say?

And now – big bummer – we have to block your posts. Because, the reason we have these (sometimes awkward) family conversations around the table is that we care about our sons, just as we know your parents care about you.

I know your family would not be thrilled at the thought of my teenage boys seeing you only in your towel. Did you know that once a male sees you in a state of undress, he can’t ever un-see it?  You don’t want the Hall boys to only think of you in this sexual way, do you?

Neither do we.

And so, in our house, there are no second chances, ladies. If you want to stay friendly with the Hall men, you’ll have to keep your clothes on, and your posts decent.  If you try to post a sexy selfie, or an inappropriate YouTube video – even once – you’ll be booted off our on-line island.

I know that sounds harsh and old-school, but that’s just the way it is under this roof for a while. We hope to raise men with a strong moral compass, and men of integrity don’t linger over pictures of scantily clad high-school girls.

Every day I pray for the women my boys will love.  I hope they will be drawn to real beauties, the kind of women who will leave them better people in the end. I also pray that my sons will be worthy of this kind of woman, that they will be patient – and act honorably – while they wait for her.

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Girls, it’s not too late! If you think you’ve made an on-line mistake (we all do – don’t fret – I’ve made some doozies), RUN to your accounts and take down  anything that makes it easy for your male friends to imagine you naked in your bedroom.

Will you trust me? There are boys out there waiting and hoping for women of character. Some young men are fighting the daily uphill battle to keep their minds pure, and their thoughts praiseworthy.

You are growing into a real beauty, inside and out.

Act like her, speak like her, post like her.

I’m glad we’re friends.

Mrs. Hall

IMG_0272FYI

Link is HERE.

What do you think of this?  

Replies

  • jessilin0113
    September 9, 2013 at 8:38 AM

    I just mean the mom is being naive to think people won't view those pics the same way her sons view the girls'.  Or that they won't be used for the same purpose.  To her credit, she has since changed the pics on her post. 


    Quoting snookyfritz:

    After the fact is quite different from dressing, putting on makeup, lingerie and using your best duck pout for a picture you take of yourself on your bed


    Quoting jessilin0113:

    It doesn't mean one of her boys isn't thinking he looks amazing in the picture and posting it to Facebook for that reason.  


    Quoting snookyfritz:

    Boys don't wear shirts at the beach.  I don't see a double standard there at all. The pictures were not provocative or in their nightwear, posing seductively with duck lips. Why are so many here playing coy by saying that the girl's pictures she is talking about are just candid shots taken on a whim when we all know that's not what she's talking about


    Quoting NWP:

    But what about the fact that Ms. Hall decorated her letter with half-naked photos of her boys in swimsuits? Something I doubt she would "approve" of had they been girls? What do you think about that?

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I just got a link to this in my email.  How did I miss it here?  I agree wholeheartedly with the woman who posted this.  She got a lot of grief, but I want my daughter to be modest and seen for who she really is, without the distraction of half nude photos or sexual poses










  • snookyfritz
    September 9, 2013 at 8:41 AM

    No, it's a silly family beach pose.  Now if one of the sons took a selfie of himself naked in the bathroom mirror, you'd have a good point and a great comparison


    Quoting jessilin0113:

    I just mean the mom is being naive to think people won't view those pics the same way her sons view the girls'.  Or that they won't be used for the same purpose.  To her credit, she has since changed the pics on her post. 


    Quoting snookyfritz:

    After the fact is quite different from dressing, putting on makeup, lingerie and using your best duck pout for a picture you take of yourself on your bed


    Quoting jessilin0113:

    It doesn't mean one of her boys isn't thinking he looks amazing in the picture and posting it to Facebook for that reason.  


    Quoting snookyfritz:

    Boys don't wear shirts at the beach.  I don't see a double standard there at all. The pictures were not provocative or in their nightwear, posing seductively with duck lips. Why are so many here playing coy by saying that the girl's pictures she is talking about are just candid shots taken on a whim when we all know that's not what she's talking about


    Quoting NWP:

    But what about the fact that Ms. Hall decorated her letter with half-naked photos of her boys in swimsuits? Something I doubt she would "approve" of had they been girls? What do you think about that?

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I just got a link to this in my email.  How did I miss it here?  I agree wholeheartedly with the woman who posted this.  She got a lot of grief, but I want my daughter to be modest and seen for who she really is, without the distraction of half nude photos or sexual poses












  • susannah2000
    September 9, 2013 at 8:43 AM



    Quoting Its.me.Sam.:

    hmmmmm... sounds a little judgemental.. and kind of like SHE is oversexualizing them...as if a bikini pic = bad kid unworthy of her sons.
    i have a grown daughter..and i have a son nearing 10.. this is not what how i would address this topic with my son, and i DID always advise my daughter that those pic stay online forever and that she needs to understand what she is representing.  but yeah..  a couple of pics dont mean a girl has no character.. and teaching your son that a girl who may pose a little on the sexy side has less character than one that doesnt may give him the idea that girls who do pose sexy are less than or somehow immoral and thats just not good for women... we all know what happens when you start with that crap.  
    i did like how she said she hopes her sons will be worthy of a good woman.  but a good woman can also come in the form of a young girl who took some not so modest pics of herself in her younger years as she was discovering herself and her sexuality.
     


    Oddly enough, one doesn't usually hear about utterly "trashy" girls who send selfies to practically perfect in every way teen boys, like the Hall boys apparently are, who NEVER do or say or even THINK of anything remotely sexualized. Who knew? Teenage sexuality is all girls' fault! I think instead of continuing to point the "holier than thou" finger at clueless teenage girls, Mrs Hall realizes that teenage sexuality is experienced by both boys and girls, and alot of times, more so by boys, and to encourage both to have other interests and activities . I don't think she is sending a good message to her children, male or female, that girls are just hos, trying to take advantage of highly pure and moral boys. Neither makes for a positive self image.

  • NWP
    by NWP
    September 9, 2013 at 9:02 AM
    Do you wear a bra under your swimsuit? Lol. Of course these macho poses are meant to look sexy. Your personal double standard is showing.

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    Boys don't wear shirts at the beach.  I don't see a double standard there at all. The pictures were not provocative or in their nightwear, posing seductively with duck lips. Why are so many here playing coy by saying that the girl's pictures she is talking about are just candid shots taken on a whim when we all know that's not what she's talking about



    Quoting NWP:

    But what about the fact that Ms. Hall decorated her letter with half-naked photos of her boys in swimsuits? Something I doubt she would "approve" of had they been girls? What do you think about that?

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I just got a link to this in my email.  How did I miss it here?  I agree wholeheartedly with the woman who posted this.  She got a lot of grief, but I want my daughter to be modest and seen for who she really is, without the distraction of half nude photos or sexual poses





  • coronado25
    September 9, 2013 at 9:25 AM
    I like this, but I think it would have been just as easy for this woman to say, "once a Hall boy sees you in a state of undress, he cannot ever unsee it"...I guess this woman's husband just pictures her naked all the time? And what about her boys, clad only in their bathing suits, posing like musclemen? Does she think the girls she is addressing are immune to viewing boys in a sexual way? Are such poses as her boys are assuming poses one naturally assumes before going for a swim? I have never seen my son strike such a pose before hitting the water...could it be that it is totally natural for people who are turning into adults to want to show off a bit for the opposite sex? Yes. Do they always make the right choices? No. I would tell Ms.Hall that her family perusing photos of other people's children online at her dinner table is creepy, and yes, please have the Hall boys unfriend immediately. Even though my daughter does not all fall into the category of young women you are describing, if she ever does strike a pose in her bikini that would suggest she thinks of herself as a goodlooking, or mimics poses that she has seen women in media strike, such as the pose struck by a son of yours in your half naked beach photos of your boys, I would not want the Hall grown ups using her as a dinnertime conversation piece.
  • smalltowngal
    September 9, 2013 at 9:38 AM

    Guess one of her boys will probably not date my daughter because I'll probably encourage her just to wear a cami and not a bra. I hate that bras are considered mandatory for modesty.

  • snookyfritz
    September 9, 2013 at 9:45 AM

    I don't think they were so I think your relativism is showing.  Th poses look more silly than sexy. 


    Quoting NWP:

    Do you wear a bra under your swimsuit? Lol. Of course these macho poses are meant to look sexy. Your personal double standard is showing.

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    Boys don't wear shirts at the beach.  I don't see a double standard there at all. The pictures were not provocative or in their nightwear, posing seductively with duck lips. Why are so many here playing coy by saying that the girl's pictures she is talking about are just candid shots taken on a whim when we all know that's not what she's talking about



    Quoting NWP:

    But what about the fact that Ms. Hall decorated her letter with half-naked photos of her boys in swimsuits? Something I doubt she would "approve" of had they been girls? What do you think about that?

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I just got a link to this in my email.  How did I miss it here?  I agree wholeheartedly with the woman who posted this.  She got a lot of grief, but I want my daughter to be modest and seen for who she really is, without the distraction of half nude photos or sexual poses







  • NWP
    by NWP
    September 9, 2013 at 10:30 AM
    So did those pictures of the girls in pajamas with the duck face. It seems to be only a problem when there's girls in the picture

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I don't think they were so I think your relativism is showing.  Th poses look more silly than sexy. 



    Quoting NWP:

    Do you wear a bra under your swimsuit? Lol. Of course these macho poses are meant to look sexy. Your personal double standard is showing.



    Quoting snookyfritz:

    Boys don't wear shirts at the beach.  I don't see a double standard there at all. The pictures were not provocative or in their nightwear, posing seductively with duck lips. Why are so many here playing coy by saying that the girl's pictures she is talking about are just candid shots taken on a whim when we all know that's not what she's talking about




    Quoting NWP:

    But what about the fact that Ms. Hall decorated her letter with half-naked photos of her boys in swimsuits? Something I doubt she would "approve" of had they been girls? What do you think about that?

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I just got a link to this in my email.  How did I miss it here?  I agree wholeheartedly with the woman who posted this.  She got a lot of grief, but I want my daughter to be modest and seen for who she really is, without the distraction of half nude photos or sexual poses









  • snookyfritz
    September 9, 2013 at 10:34 AM

    It's all about intent.  There is a group of boys goofing around on a family vacation and then a young woman posing provocatively on her bed, in her pajamas, carefully made up.  If there were girls on the beach striking a silly pose or making a pyramid, it'd be fine.  It's not ok in the context of what this woman is talking about.


    Quoting NWP:

    So did those pictures of the girls in pajamas with the duck face. It seems to be only a problem when there's girls in the picture

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I don't think they were so I think your relativism is showing.  Th poses look more silly than sexy. 



    Quoting NWP:

    Do you wear a bra under your swimsuit? Lol. Of course these macho poses are meant to look sexy. Your personal double standard is showing.



    Quoting snookyfritz:

    Boys don't wear shirts at the beach.  I don't see a double standard there at all. The pictures were not provocative or in their nightwear, posing seductively with duck lips. Why are so many here playing coy by saying that the girl's pictures she is talking about are just candid shots taken on a whim when we all know that's not what she's talking about




    Quoting NWP:

    But what about the fact that Ms. Hall decorated her letter with half-naked photos of her boys in swimsuits? Something I doubt she would "approve" of had they been girls? What do you think about that?

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I just got a link to this in my email.  How did I miss it here?  I agree wholeheartedly with the woman who posted this.  She got a lot of grief, but I want my daughter to be modest and seen for who she really is, without the distraction of half nude photos or sexual poses











  • NWP
    by NWP
    September 9, 2013 at 10:40 AM

    Eh...A girl fooling around acting silly standing or sitting in her bedroom dressed in her pj's is the same as these guys fooling around acting silly in their swimsuits giving sexy macho men poses with an included duck face. They are both pics of kids goofing around stricking poses that mimic sexual cultural norms and say "look at me! I'm sexy and cute!".

    And who said the photos Ms. Hall was complaining about were of girls spread all out playboy style on the bed? Ms. Hall didn't say that. You did.


    Quoting snookyfritz:

    It's all about intent.  There is a group of boys goofing around on a family vacation and then a young woman posing provocatively on her bed, in her pajamas, carefully made up.  If there were girls on the beach striking a silly pose or making a pyramid, it'd be fine.  It's not ok in the context of what this woman is talking about.


    Quoting NWP:

    So did those pictures of the girls in pajamas with the duck face. It seems to be only a problem when there's girls in the picture

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I don't think they were so I think your relativism is showing.  Th poses look more silly than sexy. 



    Quoting NWP:

    Do you wear a bra under your swimsuit? Lol. Of course these macho poses are meant to look sexy. Your personal double standard is showing.



    Quoting snookyfritz:

    Boys don't wear shirts at the beach.  I don't see a double standard there at all. The pictures were not provocative or in their nightwear, posing seductively with duck lips. Why are so many here playing coy by saying that the girl's pictures she is talking about are just candid shots taken on a whim when we all know that's not what she's talking about




    Quoting NWP:

    But what about the fact that Ms. Hall decorated her letter with half-naked photos of her boys in swimsuits? Something I doubt she would "approve" of had they been girls? What do you think about that?

    Quoting snookyfritz:

    I just got a link to this in my email.  How did I miss it here?  I agree wholeheartedly with the woman who posted this.  She got a lot of grief, but I want my daughter to be modest and seen for who she really is, without the distraction of half nude photos or sexual poses