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JavaLadybug2
Are parents letting themselves off the hook for parenting responsibilities?
December 30, 2012 at 8:41 AM

 

I have seen many post's on here of late saying things like.. "Well I can't control everything my kid does.." or "When I'm not there what can I do if my kid does x, y or z?"

And I honestly am getting sick of hearing people make excuses about why THEIR CHILD can do anything they want.. and the parent pretty much agnowledges that they have given up the right or ability to discipline or correct bad choices or behaviors in their child!?

I am sorry I think that is half the reason behind kids getting pregnant, starting to drink, do drugs etc.

Kids know.. Mom feels powerless. Dad won't back up anyrules in the house.. etc.

So How do you feel about this?

edit 

If your child commits a crime when your not arround.. ARE YOU LEGALLY RESPONSIBLE? Better bet your butt! 

If your child commits a driving violation.. when your not arround.. Do you still have to deal with insurance.. and court? Better bet your butt.. Why is it ok to say in other situations that your not responsible when legally we know that you would have to be in other instances..  

BEING THERE doesn't change your responsibility to make a child aware of your expectations of them. It doesn't change your responsibility to raise RESPONSIBLE ADULTS..  

 


Replies

  • turtle68
    December 30, 2012 at 8:54 AM

     you can have an arsehole kid ya know....just saying.

  • romalove
    December 30, 2012 at 8:54 AM

    How old are your kids?

  • christina0607
    December 30, 2012 at 8:56 AM

    Of course there are parents like this. There always have been. As a teen I had friends who had these parents. They had no rules, their parents would buy us alcohol under the guise of "I'd rather they drink at home".They weren't held to really any standards.

    These are parents who have no idea how to raise a child so they go the complete opposite and let the child raise themselves.

  • nysa76
    by nysa76
    December 30, 2012 at 8:57 AM

    I think sometimes no matter what you do, kids will make their own choices once they reach a certain point.  I think you can discipline, instill values and ultimately, your child has to choose what to do with them as they grow up.  All you can do is give it your all.

  • PortiaRose
    December 30, 2012 at 8:58 AM
    You're correct. It goes on with my 16yr old brother. My parents don't get that if he can't control himself he needs to be PUT under control. But its too late, he's almost man sized. If they wanna make an impact they need to either send him somewhere or completely overhaul what they do. They insist they can't stop him from xyz, but they can easily just not let him out of the house.
  • PortiaRose
    December 30, 2012 at 8:59 AM
    That's my parents. The last line, that is.

    Quoting christina0607:

    Of course there are parents like this. There always have been. As a teen I had friends who had these parents. They had no rules, their parents would buy us alcohol under the guise of "I'd rather they drink at home".They weren't held to really any standards.

    These are parents who have no idea how to raise a child so they go the complete opposite and let the child raise themselves.

  • christina0607
    December 30, 2012 at 9:00 AM

    Well, yeah kids are supposed to make their own choices. that's the purpose of raising your kids, so they can make their own choices. Good or bad.

    Quoting nysa76:

    I think sometimes no matter what you do, kids will make their own choices once they reach a certain point.  I think you can discipline, instill values and ultimately, your child has to choose what to do with them as they grow up.  All you can do is give it your all.


  • PortiaRose
    December 30, 2012 at 9:00 AM
    And? His flesh is MY flesh, and he will do what I want. I have seen that shit happen, too. It works, people just don't want their kids feeling like they don't have control over their own lives.

    Guess what? They don't.


    Quoting turtle68:

     you can have an arsehole kid ya know....just saying.

  • turtle68
    December 30, 2012 at 9:06 AM

     um yeah I have no idea what you are on about ....all I said was that sometimes through no fault of the parent the kid turns out to be an arsehole.

    Most will turn out like how their parents parented them....sometimes some slip through the cracks...and you wonder how the hell did that kid come from that family?!

    Quoting PortiaRose:

    And? His flesh is MY flesh, and he will do what I want. I have seen that shit happen, too. It works, people just don't want their kids feeling like they don't have control over their own lives.

    Guess what? They don't.


    Quoting turtle68:

     you can have an arsehole kid ya know....just saying.

     

  • Oddy_Knocky
    December 30, 2012 at 9:16 AM
    Oh boy.

    I'm curious to see how old your kids are OP.

    Some parents don't know how to parent but even with fantastic parents there comes a point where a child develops a brain of their own and no longer does every single thing you tell them to do.

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