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I need sum advices plz
November 18, 2012 at 1:17 AM
Im thinking of moving to another state where my brother lives, to start fresh. There are many reasons why i'm thinking of doing it. Here are some of them: my unborn babys father abandoned me while in my 7th month, of pregnancy denying that this, is not his baby, it has been really hard on me my 12y/o and my unborn baby of course. Since he did that too me, I don't want him to be near me or my baby he said the only way he will help me, Is if baby gets a DNA test which of course I will b, ok with it. His whole family supported him after being being on.my side and excited about baby since he's almost 50 and never was able to conceive in the past. I feel like God Gave him this beautiful chance to be a father, and he blew it all. I really hate this guys with all my heart, I want to moveoyt of state, just waiting for judge to grant me permission.to take my son with me. I have been living in.LA for 16 years. But I feel like I havent been very a smart in choosing the right people.(man) in my life. I thought I did with my 2nd one. But this one was even worst a selfish, materialistic heartless person who decided abandoned his baby. I really feel likw I need to move to this other state, but i'm a little.scared to start all over. And if I do, I will start the child support process so, this selfish sperm donor take responsibilities. What.should I do?


    November 18, 2012 at 8:12 AM
    In some states if you put him on child support you cant leave the state with the child, weigh all ur options and do.whats best for u and ur kids
  • Quinn525
    November 18, 2012 at 9:39 AM
    If you go for child support, your child will be legally his child. He will get visitation and for 18 years be apart of your life. You will not get to pick and chose when he gets to see his child, a court will. A court can stop you from moving. He may even get custody at one point.

    My sd's bm did not want the fathers to be involved in her children's life but wanted the support. She told my dh he was not the dad and he was left out of the birth, naming his child, and the ultrasound visits. She ws surprised when he wanted visitation. Dh and I have had custody since sd was 5. Her older sister has lived with her father or grandma for the last 8 years.
  • zumbafreak11
    November 18, 2012 at 10:56 AM

    If I were you, I'd move and start over.  Your baby's father obviously wants nothing to do with either of you and it might do your 12 year old some good too plus you'll be close to family so that's good.

  • Bluetick
    November 18, 2012 at 11:00 AM
    Think of you and your family if you feel it is best to relocate then move don't worry about what others think just do what you feel you need to. Good luck my dear
  • craemom
    by craemom
    November 18, 2012 at 11:35 AM

    Girl, You can move and start over! Once the child is born and you have the dna test done and it proves he is the father he wil have to pay child support. I f he wants to  see the child he will have to get a laywer and take it from there. but as long as he isn't on the birthcertificate you good. I suggest that you move now or right after you have the baby so that once everything takes place you already established and the judge will take it from there and yall will have to work something out. but they cant make you stay in that stated, you're trying to do whats best for you and your children. I say go for it!

  • sunflowers12
    November 18, 2012 at 11:58 AM

    well, i think its important to remember that we are all capable of making these maistakes due to believing what the ppl say to us.. i think that if you have fam, where your thinking of moving to it would be better for you so that you have the support you need for your self and kids.. it is scary and it is going to be difficult but you have to take the proper steps in which to make your self and your kids lives better...based on the post it sounds as if you really have know other choice to me its pretty cut n dry here if you have nothing holding you back then i would go.. but again you do have to be careful about taking you child outta state... best of luck to yougood luck

  • lele678
    by lele678
    November 18, 2012 at 9:32 PM
    Move close to your family start fresh. Congratulations and. Get DNA and do child support once the baby is born. Who knows maybe in the future you could meet someone not selfish and is caring and loves kids. I could tell you my story if you want I've been through a lot I'm a single mom of 2. If you want to talk please message me.
  • KylesMom409
    November 18, 2012 at 10:51 PM

     I agree.  HUGS and best wishes whatever you decide.  Keep us posted.

    Quoting zumbafreak11:

    If I were you, I'd move and start over.  Your baby's father obviously wants nothing to do with either of you and it might do your 12 year old some good too plus you'll be close to family so that's good.


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