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sleeblended
How to be at 3 places in one day
November 16, 2012 at 11:57 AM

Thanksgiving...a time where everyone wants you at their house, and gets their feelings hurt if you don't.  My parents are divorced.  My dad lives about an hour and a half away from me.  My mom wants to do lunch at her house at 11.  DH's mom wants to do dinner at her house at 5.  My dad's family has planned lunch at my grandfather's house at noon.  What do I do?  I don't want to hurt feelings, but someone's feelings will be hurt if I don't go to their house.  Any suggestions? 

Replies

  • mommy2boys03
    November 16, 2012 at 12:03 PM

    You go to your mother's first for either appitizers or dinner then go to you granfather's for dessert and stay awhile .  The kids can nap in the car then end the day at your in laws.  Nothing says you have to have eat dinner at all houses. I'm sure they would love just to have you and your family for awhile.


  • diaperstodating
    November 16, 2012 at 12:06 PM

    Bump

  • Briesmom38
    November 16, 2012 at 12:21 PM

    I know its tuff, we are always invited to a few different places, and to be honest I don't want to spend the day traveling, so I usually just accept the first invitation I get and let everyone else know that I am already committed.  

  • mushmom
    by mushmom
    November 16, 2012 at 12:37 PM

    Gah, that's too much to manage.  I'm very thankful I'm not in that situation.  THat's tough.

  • Marimaru
    November 16, 2012 at 4:11 PM

    Put it on a rotation.  I'm at my mom's one year and my husband's family gathering the next.

  • jenmatt451
    November 16, 2012 at 6:23 PM

    I feel yah!  Every year it's the same old thing..."where do we go and who do we tick off?"  My husband's parents are elderly and if we don't go to their house, they make a simple meal for just the two of them.  I adore my in-laws and it breaks my heart to know they would be alone.  My family gets together at my parents house and it's always a crowd of people between my four siblings, their spouses and ALL the kids.  I have hosted Thanksgiving once at our house (they year we moved in) and invited both of our families.  It was fun; but a lot of work and with two toddlers in the house now, there is no way I could manage it anytime soon.  This year we are going to my in-laws.  I'm sure my family will be a littled miffed but there won't be many more years of Thanksgiving for my in-laws and we want to enjoy them as long as we can.

  • e-doolittle
    November 16, 2012 at 7:01 PM


    Quoting mommy2boys03:

    You go to your mother's first for either appitizers or dinner then go to you granfather's for dessert and stay awhile .  The kids can nap in the car then end the day at your in laws.  Nothing says you have to have eat dinner at all houses. I'm sure they would love just to have you and your family for awhile.


  • elzmnsf
    by elzmnsf
    November 17, 2012 at 2:43 AM
    I think, especially in your situation, you might need to split years up. My mom and dad are friends with my mil, and they are the only one with a house big enough for everyone , so we have the holidays at my parents. We told mil that since we have the only kids, no other family is near, and we want the kids to remember having a bunch of family around, that she should come with to my parents and she agreed. When we had a bigger place we would invite her and my parents if we wanted to do a holiday ourselves, which was often. We also lived too far away for many years, so when we came back everyone understood that we had our own traditions and that was that. But in your case, in order to have a not totally stressful day, I would pick and choose. And go to the other peoples houses on fri and sat for family time and all that. Then next year the other two places get the actual day and the previous year's dinner tables get other days. Sanity is important!
  • sunflowers12
    November 17, 2012 at 11:12 AM

    very carefully n time management would be a must.. 

  • Pukalani79
    November 17, 2012 at 11:24 AM

     My mom and my in-laws live only about 15-20 min apart.  We go to Mom's for lunch around noon, then over to my in-laws usually around 4 or so.  When we first had kids (11 years ago) they worked it out so that we could go to both and that's just how we've always done it. 

    My dad lived an hour and a half away for awhile and we just couldn't do all three.  Either plan to be in one area or the other, I would either travel or stay close.  Maybe rotate Thanksgiving and Christmas?

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