I need help. My son is a very good hearted little boy and says he is very excited about the new baby but he is seven years old and has been an only child for all that time. He has never really had to share Mommy and Daddy for seven years. I know he is going to have some hang ups because it is normal. Any advice?
by sunflowers12November 13, 2012 at 1:08 PM
the only way he is going to have hang ups about it is if you have hang ups about it.. nothing will change as far as he being the older child doesnt change the fact the you love him or anything.. i have six kids and not one of them had hang ups about the new one coming home... best to chill about things... he will react the way you react...
November 13, 2012 at 1:14 PM
Make sure you still give him time with you and dad one on one. Also tell him how lucky the new baby is to have such a great older sibling. That is what we have done for our son, and he is a fantastic older brother, with no hints of jealousy.
November 13, 2012 at 1:15 PM
I don't really have any hang ups but I have been noticing that he has been acting out more lately. The doctor said even if you have no interference with the whole thing it is natural for a child to feel like they are no longer center of attention and now I have to share two people I NEVER had to share before. Kids do get territorial and they do not like sharing a lot. It is only natural and I want to help him understand that he isn't losing us and that sharing us is not that bad. You had all your children together... great. I have infertility issues and suddenly 7 years later TADA! So I am dealing with things you didn't have to deal with. Psychologically kids who were singles and went to sharing have even been known to wet their bed suddenly and digress. I watched my nephew go through it. So now we are working with my son to make sure he is okay and that he knows that we love him, support him, and that he will make a great big brother.
He is going with me this Friday for the ultrasound to see his sibling (gender reveal day), he is going to help me pick out stuff for the babies room, and I told him he can talk to me about any of his concerns and I will not get mad at him. So far he is doing awesome.
Thanks for the advice everyone!
November 13, 2012 at 1:19 PM
He told me he wants to help me with teaching the baby to read and he will play with the baby so I can clean. So we will see how this goes.
November 13, 2012 at 1:23 PM
My nephew did the same thing and I think that is why I was really worried about it. Heck my parents had my siblings and I a year apart and we fought like cats and dogs lol. Sometimes things happen and it is just a great idea on making the transition a little more smooth. He is older and he may have a lot better understanding of the situation but I LOVE the advice that can make that happen.
You have received good advice. I think it's great you are asking for it. I was my parents only child for 8 years, and I was jealous when my sister was born.
Give him little jobs to help out. Make him feel important.
Get him involved in caring for the baby so that he feels some responsibility...that way it's not like he's sharing you with the baby...it's more like he's sharing the baby with you.