40ish and beyond...

I guess its time to really get the awareness out......
by dana63
January 16, 2013 at 6:23 PM

 As you all know I have full custody and trying to adopt my oldest granddaughter. Tinker has been with me since day one and never left me except 3 weeks when she was a month old. She is going on 7 next week and she is the light of my life.. With that said.....

I walk to pick her up from school so I get up there 15 minutes early. I have been talking to some of the parents the last few days and come to find out that out of 10 parents that 8 of us are raising a child that they have or adopting. They are either a child of someone in the family or placed with them. We all got together and was talking and amazed the number of us that are start over moms. We are a proud bunch and proud of our babies and will keep talking and supporting each other.

This awareness needs to get out because each year the number of people who are raising a child that is another families child (for whatever reason) has grown to over 3 million and grows each day.

I would never change my life and the others will not either but if we dont have awareness for legal matters and support we might lose our child back to the parent even if it is 10 years later if they dont have custody.



  • crazymom729
    January 16, 2013 at 6:27 PM

     So true...I'm not in this situation but I have friends that are.  They have full custody of the grandchildren. If the situation ever presented itself to me (hopefully not) I would not hesitate to step up, no matter what my age.

  • manilowgal
    January 16, 2013 at 6:27 PM
    Man, than surprises me. I didn't realize it was that many parents raising someone else's child. That's really interesting.
  • Mariagma3
    January 16, 2013 at 7:27 PM

     That's alot for your group of friends! As you know, my Mom raised my daughter, Erin. My bff, Lisa, is raising her granddaughter, Brooke. Something does need to be done so that Grandparents do NOT lose their rights. If you know or hear of any petitions, let me know! This is very important!!

  • mrgetinold
    January 16, 2013 at 7:58 PM
    Im proud of all you that lovingly raise a child! There shouldnt be such legal hassels in raising a child lucky ( and i know there is joy on the side of the mom and pop that are raising a child too) enough to have a family no matter how that family came to be! What matters that the kid have a supportive, loving home to grow up in! Yay your Tink ( and all the others too) blessed to have a family! Hugs!
  • starlight1968
    January 16, 2013 at 8:07 PM

     hugs Dana!  A friend of mine is dealing with the legal issues right now.. Her daughter dropped off her 3 boys (all under 4yo) at my friends door (her mom) rang the bell and LEFT!!  She wasn't home but thank God the neighbor who is a close friend saw it and ran over to get them before they wandered off or something bad happened.  Clearly she wants nothing to do with them (she's not called ONCE since she dropped them off) but Veronica is having grief trying to get custody of them still... I bow down to you all for stepping up and caring for these poor babies...

  • keljo05
    by keljo05
    January 16, 2013 at 8:21 PM

    there's a young woman in JP's therapy group who has 2 foster kids. They just found out the girls are ok for adoption after 6 months and I asked her how she got the girls.. and it's her nieces. So sad especially since they are up for adoption so quickly.

  • LFosterfarm
    January 16, 2013 at 8:25 PM

     this generation of kids/parents absolutely blows my mind!!!  nothing like it was when we were growing up or even young adults/parents.  you just didn't do things like that back then, kwim?

  • starlight1968
    January 16, 2013 at 8:45 PM

     I know right?  There were 2 girls in my grade that got pregnant and they both kept the kiddos, still went to school etc. and still have those kids today..they didn't pawn them off on mom/dad. 

    Quoting LFosterfarm:

     this generation of kids/parents absolutely blows my mind!!!  nothing like it was when we were growing up or even young adults/parents.  you just didn't do things like that back then, kwim?


  • cuteoverload
    January 16, 2013 at 8:54 PM

    That has to be a scary situation that happens every day.  If someone turns their life around and wants their child back, it would be so hard to have to let that child go.  Being a foster parent would be hard too.  With the economy the way it is, more families are being torn apart.  Sometimes it is not the parents fault because they have little skills, but for the child's sake, I know that the court as well as social services looks at whether or not the child is neglected in any way.  The parent only needs to provide minimum care.  I love my two sons but happy that my life turned out the way it did.  Please keep this in mind because the background check will involve everyone in the family, as well as friends and neighbors. 

  • eroberts168
    January 16, 2013 at 9:06 PM

    So, are we--Well have always helped her mother since she was born 11 years ago,and have her all the time she is not in school.  We buy all her clothes, all her needs all the time except for food and sometimes even that.

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