Tween Titans

psych_mom
Do parents of tweens believe
October 14, 2012 at 12:35 PM

that their kids don't know what sex is? I am shocked that parents believe this, especially when their child goes to school, because believe me they do know and they know a lot of misinformation that they hear from other kids. So please don't think they don't know what it is and don't put off talking to them until it is too late. Talk to them, communicate with them and have an ongoing conversation. They need you, not the junk their friends think they know.

Replies

  • M4LG5
    by M4LG5
    October 14, 2012 at 12:52 PM
    I remember having my own ideas of sex. Unfortunately, my parents never talked to me about it.

    Yesterday, we were in the car and one of my girls asked how they got in my tummy. My oldest did explain well that "mommy had an egg in her belly and daddy gave her a...uh....what's it called.......oh, sperm." Then she asked how the sperm got there. I panicked and said we give each other a special hug. We were in the car so I didn't want to have THAT conversation while I was driving.

    I had to admit, I'm not sure how to have THAT conversation.
  • psych_mom
    October 14, 2012 at 12:57 PM

    It is hard at times to have that conversation, lol, but your girls are young so you did good at keeping it age appropriate. My son is 11 so we were very open with him the few times that we talked with him. My husband was with me when I talked to him because I felt that it was important to have a male perspective. We did touch on some with my dd on her 8th birthday but it was more about the posibility of being able to get her period over the next few years. Soon we will start talking to my middle ds about sex as well because he turns 10. They all know how babies are made, but I want them to know they can talk to us and not their friends.

    Quoting M4LG5:

    I remember having my own ideas of sex. Unfortunately, my parents never talked to me about it.

    Yesterday, we were in the car and one of my girls asked how they got in my tummy. My oldest did explain well that "mommy had an egg in her belly and daddy gave her a...uh....what's it called.......oh, sperm." Then she asked how the sperm got there. I panicked and said we give each other a special hug. We were in the car so I didn't want to have THAT conversation while I was driving.

    I had to admit, I'm not sure how to have THAT conversation.


  • EslingerCrew11
    October 14, 2012 at 1:11 PM
    My 8 yo knows more I'm sure than shes mentioned. She told me a year or so ago, that sex is when a guy and girl kiss and take their shirts off. She knows about periods and some about babies (from me) because she's the oldest of 4 (and oldest of 8 grands on my side, 8 on her bio dads side and 11 on my Dhs side).

    My 5 year old recently told me sexy is grownups having kiss time

    I know my 8 yo can handle the penis and vagina conversation (they've always known the real names of these parts) and while I know ita important, I almost feel that while I NEED to talk to her about it since I know shes hearing it at school, that its inappropriate of me to do so.... Though I know I shouldn't feel that way.
  • psych_mom
    October 14, 2012 at 1:16 PM

    Definitely not inappropriate. You can have age appropriate conversations and as she gets older add more to what you talk about. Parents really need to make sure that they give the correct information and talk to their children about what they feel is morally appropriate (such as abstinence, birth control and things like that) because friends definitely can't do that. We are here to get through this together:)

    Quoting EslingerCrew11:

    My 8 yo knows more I'm sure than shes mentioned. She told me a year or so ago, that sex is when a guy and girl kiss and take their shirts off. She knows about periods and some about babies (from me) because she's the oldest of 4 (and oldest of 8 grands on my side, 8 on her bio dads side and 11 on my Dhs side).

    My 5 year old recently told me sexy is grownups having kiss time

    I know my 8 yo can handle the penis and vagina conversation (they've always known the real names of these parts) and while I know ita important, I almost feel that while I NEED to talk to her about it since I know shes hearing it at school, that its inappropriate of me to do so.... Though I know I shouldn't feel that way.


  • EslingerCrew11
    October 14, 2012 at 1:27 PM
    Shes always been... Ahead of the game mentally/emotionally when it comes to atuff like this, or bigger things. Ive always been able to just tell her how it is, and shes gets it and accepts it, much better than other kids I know her age. I know for us the road block is me and not because of a lack of my comfort level, im comfortable talking to her about just about anything, but double guessing if its the ”right time” to address things with her.
    Shes really good at telling me when shes gotten enough info for the time being. When we first talked about periods we talked about some day shed have one too and started talking about the details and at one point she was ”ok mom, I think Im good, we can worry about it more when we get there, k”. I just need to get over it :D


    Quoting psych_mom:

    Definitely not inappropriate. You can have age appropriate conversations and as she gets older add more to what you talk about. Parents really need to make sure that they give the correct information and talk to their children about what they feel is morally appropriate (such as abstinence, birth control and things like that) because friends definitely can't do that. We are here to get through this together:)

    Quoting EslingerCrew11:

    My 8 yo knows more I'm sure than shes mentioned. She told me a year or so ago, that sex is when a guy and girl kiss and take their shirts off. She knows about periods and some about babies (from me) because she's the oldest of 4 (and oldest of 8 grands on my side, 8 on her bio dads side and 11 on my Dhs side).



    My 5 year old recently told me sexy is grownups having kiss time



    I know my 8 yo can handle the penis and vagina conversation (they've always known the real names of these parts) and while I know ita important, I almost feel that while I NEED to talk to her about it since I know shes hearing it at school, that its inappropriate of me to do so.... Though I know I shouldn't feel that way.



  • psych_mom
    October 14, 2012 at 1:30 PM

    It's good that she's that way. I think as parents we all have those moments of worry- should I do it now, is it too late, is it too soon. If only we had a hand book, lol. Even after taking psych classes and counseling classes for kids, I still have the same questions because they are all different. They each need to be born with their own individual instruction book, haha.

    Quoting EslingerCrew11:

    Shes always been... Ahead of the game mentally/emotionally when it comes to atuff like this, or bigger things. Ive always been able to just tell her how it is, and shes gets it and accepts it, much better than other kids I know her age. I know for us the road block is me and not because of a lack of my comfort level, im comfortable talking to her about just about anything, but double guessing if its the ”right time” to address things with her.
    Shes really good at telling me when shes gotten enough info for the time being. When we first talked about periods we talked about some day shed have one too and started talking about the details and at one point she was ”ok mom, I think Im good, we can worry about it more when we get there, k”. I just need to get over it :D


    Quoting psych_mom:

    Definitely not inappropriate. You can have age appropriate conversations and as she gets older add more to what you talk about. Parents really need to make sure that they give the correct information and talk to their children about what they feel is morally appropriate (such as abstinence, birth control and things like that) because friends definitely can't do that. We are here to get through this together:)

    Quoting EslingerCrew11:

    My 8 yo knows more I'm sure than shes mentioned. She told me a year or so ago, that sex is when a guy and girl kiss and take their shirts off. She knows about periods and some about babies (from me) because she's the oldest of 4 (and oldest of 8 grands on my side, 8 on her bio dads side and 11 on my Dhs side).



    My 5 year old recently told me sexy is grownups having kiss time



    I know my 8 yo can handle the penis and vagina conversation (they've always known the real names of these parts) and while I know ita important, I almost feel that while I NEED to talk to her about it since I know shes hearing it at school, that its inappropriate of me to do so.... Though I know I shouldn't feel that way.




  • kmrtigger
    October 14, 2012 at 3:21 PM

    Believe me, mine know all about sex, babies, masturbation, etc. It's something we have ALWAYS talked about. When a question was asked we answered age appropriately, and talked about it more. It's not a ONE TIME talk. It's a series of conversations that never really end.

  • SuperLooneyMom
    October 14, 2012 at 9:53 PM
    I know my boys have an idea but I and my dh will deal with it when we think it is best. No I'm not surprised if my kids know but do believe they aren't educated on sex a's other kids. And I am super ok with that.
  • Lorena
    by Lorena
    October 14, 2012 at 10:39 PM
    My 14, 13, 12 & 10 yr olds know about sex and everything that goes with it. We have been very open an honest with them when ever they had a question. My problem is with the youngest 3 the oldest being 9 ask me questions but I don't know how to answer because they are my step kids.
  • catngabsmom
    October 14, 2012 at 11:05 PM
    I am sure mine know more than I think, but I am willing to let it slide for a few months before I get into any big conversations. My oldest will be having the 5th grade health talk towards the end of the school year, I am sure that will trigger many conversations with her and my younger dd.

Tween Titans

Active Posts in All Groups
More Active Posts
Featured Posts in All Groups
More Featured Posts