Age Gap Relationships. Age is just a number.
How does family on both sides treat you knowing your age gap? How did they react when you first got together? I am 40 & husband is 49 my husbands side of family with him coming from family of 5 brothers & 1 sister , I am actually the youngest and when I met him 7 yrs ago he had 4 kids & I had 2 which all his kids are now in there 20's and we have 3 grandchildren,but being in age gap to be honest do you ever feel likes its awkard at times when you go to family get togethers & wonder what everyone realy thinks? Do you ever find it hard at times when there kids are so much older than yours & you feel like your to young to be a grandmother? Am I only one whos felt this way ,,just being honest! Maybe its just me,cause I do love him very much & all his family was very accepting of me & my kids when we met,but even now after 7 yrs when we go to family get togethers at his parents I for some reason feel like Im on outside looking in & I dont know if its cause everyones older than me that I feel like we dont have much in commen or just my own insecuritys Im not sure what it is,but when we go everyone is nice and they will say hi but that is it,they make no effort to really get to know me and will sit and talk among thereselves so I feel uncomfortable,even his 4 kids make no effort to really get to know me and my kids they visit from time to time,but dont include me or my kids in anything . It does bother me and I didnt know if it was cause they had problem with my husband & I's age difference ,but I could be wrong. Normally I dont care what people think ,but Ive been trying to put my finger on why I have felt the way I do ,I do know he was married to his 1st wife his kids mother for 18 yrs and they were closer in age then him & I ,so maybe his family & his kids just arent use to seeing him with someone else thats younger I dont know! Am I wrong or do you think it could just be me? Have you ever had family not accepting of your age gap?
Replies
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im soo sorry to hear that they hate you sometimes i get a vibe liek that too. but yer dont worry what they think just as long as you both loove eachother thats the main thing! so what has your partner said to heis childern about you? has he stuck up for you.. ?
i have stepdaughters who are older than me also, sounds strange but thats just the way it is, cant be helped... but sometimes a bit awarkward.. its nice to know that you have stepdaughters that are older than you.. cause i would have never thought that id come accross someone that has step daughters that are older than you thats aweosme..
but im sorry a bout the rest. you can add me as afriend if you like?! so we can chat and get to know eachother a bit more. 
Quoting Mbpeaceful12:
My stepdaugters who are older than I am hate me; they think that I am a gold digger even though my husband is broke. When I revealed this on Confessions (I replied to a post), a bitch said that she would hate me too because it is gross. -
Quoting Lisa_7777:
im soo sorry to hear that they hate you sometimes i get a vibe liek that too. but yer dont worry what they think just as long as you both loove eachother thats the main thing! so what has your partner said to heis childern about you? has he stuck up for you.. ?
i have stepdaughters who are older than me also, sounds strange but thats just the way it is, cant be helped... but sometimes a bit awarkward.. its nice to know that you have stepdaughters that are older than you.. cause i would have never thought that id come accross someone that has step daughters that are older than you thats aweosme..
but im sorry a bout the rest. you can add me as afriend if you like?! so we can chat and get to know eachother a bit more. 
Quoting Mbpeaceful12:
My stepdaugters who are older than I am hate me; they think that I am a gold digger even though my husband is broke. When I revealed this on Confessions (I replied to a post), a bitch said that she would hate me too because it is gross.My husband plays it off like it is no big deal when actually he contributes to it. For example, I am in school to earn a Teaching Credential and Master's in Education. My husband does not have a formal or vocational education; in those situations, you have to work minimum wage jobs. Before we were together he had to work them (plus two or three at a time) and now he is working two minimum-waged jobs. My goal in becoming educated is to NOT have to do that. When he is on the phone with his daughters, he would say, "Yeah because I am still the only one working'....", "I still have to work these two jobs", and so forth. Of course, when they come to visit, my stepdaughters' attitude towards me is like they would have towards Peggy Bundy-the last time I checked, Peggy Bundy was not in three honour societies and earning a graduate degree with two children. What my husband and stepdaughters are casually forgetting is that he is blessed to not have been laid off like millions of other Americans. Yes, he has to work two jobs, but there is always someone else who has it worse than you do-some people wish they had one job to go to. And the oldest stepdaughter has to work two jobs because she made horrible decisions, while the second one is living with her mother and husband with five children. So basically, I am holding my peace. When (and if, you know teachers are getting laid off left and right) I receive my first paycheck that will show them what happens when you are disciplined, determined, and patient enough to endure not only full-class loads, examinations, and papers, but also not having the support that is needed-with God's help, I made anyhow.
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I think his family see me as his mid-life crisis. He's 57 and 15 yrs older than I am. We've been together for 6 yrs and living together for the last 7 months. Since I've moved in, his daughter, who's 10 yrs younger, rarely ever calls him anymore and it's because he's with me. She
doesn't like me and has no reason not to like me. Everytime that I've seen her, I've gone out of my way to be as nice/friendly as possible. Also, the daughter is an educated woman so it kind of amazes me that she has the attitude of a 5 yr old when it comes to me. -
I think you have to walk a tight rope when it comes to the bf and the kids. My bf is younger and when we started getting serious we had long talks about how he would deal with my kids. It was a little rocky at first because my kids were overly protective of me. It took a while for them to really get to like him and for his part, he never tried pushing the relationship. He's more like the fun uncle now or the older brother and I'm the Mom, so it's a balance that has worked out for the most part.
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That's just horrible...I hope you told her a what for..
Quoting Mbpeaceful12:
My stepdaugters who are older than I am hate me; they think that I am a gold digger even though my husband is broke. When I revealed this on Confessions (I replied to a post), a bitch said that she would hate me too because it is gross. -
I was extremely blessed. When the SO & I started dating I was scared because he is 12 years older than me and I am only 8 years older than his one and only daughter. But his parents took me and my 4 kiddos (dd-22, ds-20, ds-19 & ds-16) into their family with open arms. SO has 3 kids (dd-31, ds-29 & ds-28) from his first marriage. The SO also comes from a very large and active family, so there are a lot of get togethers, and no one has ever made me or my kids feel awkward. Our children actually call each other steps. Neither mine nor his kids call us step-mom or step-dad, but my kids will to their friends when they introduce my SO. They say it is easier since we have been together for 10 years now. I don't have a large family, but they did accept him as well with open arms. My Mom & aunts love him, and that means the world to me.
The one thing that saved me is I understand the relationship between daddy & daughter, so whenever she needs her *daddy* time, I back off. Ticks the SO off because he just doesn't understand, but it helped out my relationship with her and really sometimes that means the most. As for being a grandma, I love it. My own dd gave me *my* first grandson a few months after SO's youngest son's wife gave birth to our first grandson. I now have 4 grandbabies and 1 due in Jan. And yes, only one is still from my side, but they all call me Mema.
I hope you ladies that are having a hard time find piece. I could never imagine going through years of not being accepted. Sending y'all hugs & prayers.
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My SO and my children are very close in age. It is definitely a balancing act. RESPECT is huge for both sides. Me being the older one in the relationship and my SO having no children is challenging. Patience and a lot of open conversation is the key. My extended family is not at all happy but they are respectful.
SO's family on the other hand HATES our relationship even though we are very good for one another. They opening bash me every chance they get and he has not spoken with them in months. It makes me very sad and almost made me leave the relationship. I do not want him choosing between me and his family. He has asked me to respect his decision to be in our relationship despite what his family thinks and I will.