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_coldcoffee_
name game
January 25, 2013 at 4:03 PM

so heres the situation:

babys daddy isnt gonna be in th pic when its born (his choice) and refuses to acknowledge its even his; calls me a slut and just really makin excuses for himself to get out of it, so needless to say were not on terms. my mom always had a thing about the way he treated me and since he aint gonna be part of its life, says i should give it my last name and not put the father on the certificate at all.

it feels wrong to me, but then i wouldve thought hed change his mind over the duration of the pregnancy but he hasnt budged and im almost 8 months now. i told babys daddy about this thought and he was really pissed (?); not sure if he just wanted to claim it for taxes or what. i thought it was funny how he got mad when HES the one that wanted to leave and HE doesnt want anythin to do with us, all his choice.

so i guess what im askin is should i take my moms advice? i aint got long to debate this, but i want to make the right choice for my baby in the long run. plus i think its a girl (i wanted to be surprised) so does the last name really matter in that case?

Replies

  • _coldcoffee_
    January 26, 2013 at 1:23 AM

    uhhh, no lol  didnt think of it that way

    Quoting yezay:

    Do you want to be called mrs "his last name" your child's entire life? If not use your last name!!!


  • MsPopo
    by MsPopo
    January 26, 2013 at 7:40 AM
    Honey. Give your child your last name, I did! You will be very limited in terms of decisions for your child ie school etc. I would say go as far as putting "father unknown" on the birth certificate. Right now I'm trying to get my daughter a passport so we can travel and home affairs not only requires his I.D. But his presence at the offices. It's a pain in the ass. Empower yourself honey, don't make a sentimental, emotional decision.
  • yezay
    by yezay
    January 26, 2013 at 9:05 AM
    My son has my exs last name and I get called mrs so and so all the time even after I've corrected them multiple times.

    Quoting _coldcoffee_:

    uhhh, no lol  didnt think of it that way

    Quoting yezay:

    Do you want to be called mrs "his last name" your child's entire life? If not use your last name!!!


  • ckmom2013
    January 26, 2013 at 9:09 AM
    I wish my kids had my last name. Give the baby yours!
  • LifeCafe42
    January 26, 2013 at 9:46 AM
    Use your last name you can always hyphenate his on
  • _coldcoffee_
    January 27, 2013 at 1:57 AM

    lol that would be so funny XD  if its a girl, her name would be Avalon Shay Lewis-Armstrong!! good grief lol

    Quoting LifeCafe42:

    Use your last name you can always hyphenate his on


  • _coldcoffee_
    January 27, 2013 at 2:01 AM

    im a very emotional person, always have been. not boo-hoo over spilled milk kind but not far from it lol im just tryin to be nice and i get taken advantage of for it, but when it comes to my baby, i want to do whats best for it, daddys optional.


    that sounds like a real pain..

    Quoting MsPopo:

    Honey. Give your child your last name, I did! You will be very limited in terms of decisions for your child ie school etc. I would say go as far as putting "father unknown" on the birth certificate. Right now I'm trying to get my daughter a passport so we can travel and home affairs not only requires his I.D. But his presence at the offices. It's a pain in the ass. Empower yourself honey, don't make a sentimental, emotional decision.


  • Emiliush
    January 27, 2013 at 8:29 PM

    that's what I did!!!!!!!! no father in my sons birth certificate or life!!!!!!

    [plus if you will want to get him a passport, they will ask you to get permition from both parents. that is if the father is on the birth certificate.- such a waste!!!! SO MUCH BETTER BEING IN CONTROL OF YOUR OWN CHILD, I MEAN THE FATHER WOULDN'T CARE OR DO ANYTING EITHER WAY. WHAT'S THE POINT!!...]

    And I am happy with my decision!!! it's hard, but you get lots of help from people who do care!!

    [plus if he will have the fathers last name, and youre a single mom. and dad wouldn't be involved. it will be kinda hard knowing your the mom with different last names. i think. im not sure how it works!]

  • Emiliush
    January 27, 2013 at 8:32 PM

    and thats exactly why i didn't put his name!!!!!!! for gods sake you don't need that asshole!!

    it's an amazing feeling knowing your child is ALL YOURS!!! :)

    Quoting MsPopo:

    Honey. Give your child your last name, I did! You will be very limited in terms of decisions for your child ie school etc. I would say go as far as putting "father unknown" on the birth certificate. Right now I'm trying to get my daughter a passport so we can travel and home affairs not only requires his I.D. But his presence at the offices. It's a pain in the ass. Empower yourself honey, don't make a sentimental, emotional decision.



  • _coldcoffee_
    January 27, 2013 at 11:14 PM

    idk what hes doin.. first hes all like 'fuck this shit' and not wantin anythin to do with it, then hes like i want pics and visitation and wants to stick around for a while, then i started makin my baby registry and asked if he wanted to see what i put on there, and hes like 'eh' and i said 'so you dont' and hes like 'why, idrc, so if you want to show me show me' ....

    Quoting Emiliush:

    that's what I did!!!!!!!! no father in my sons birth certificate or life!!!!!!

    [plus if you will want to get him a passport, they will ask you to get permition from both parents. that is if the father is on the birth certificate.- such a waste!!!! SO MUCH BETTER BEING IN CONTROL OF YOUR OWN CHILD, I MEAN THE FATHER WOULDN'T CARE OR DO ANYTING EITHER WAY. WHAT'S THE POINT!!...]

    And I am happy with my decision!!! it's hard, but you get lots of help from people who do care!!

    [plus if he will have the fathers last name, and youre a single mom. and dad wouldn't be involved. it will be kinda hard knowing your the mom with different last names. i think. im not sure how it works!]


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