Single Moms
so heres the situation:
babys daddy isnt gonna be in th pic when its born (his choice) and refuses to acknowledge its even his; calls me a slut and just really makin excuses for himself to get out of it, so needless to say were not on terms. my mom always had a thing about the way he treated me and since he aint gonna be part of its life, says i should give it my last name and not put the father on the certificate at all.
it feels wrong to me, but then i wouldve thought hed change his mind over the duration of the pregnancy but he hasnt budged and im almost 8 months now. i told babys daddy about this thought and he was really pissed (?); not sure if he just wanted to claim it for taxes or what. i thought it was funny how he got mad when HES the one that wanted to leave and HE doesnt want anythin to do with us, all his choice.
so i guess what im askin is should i take my moms advice? i aint got long to debate this, but i want to make the right choice for my baby in the long run. plus i think its a girl (i wanted to be surprised) so does the last name really matter in that case?
Replies
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uhhh, no lol didnt think of it that way
Quoting yezay:
Do you want to be called mrs "his last name" your child's entire life? If not use your last name!!! -
Honey. Give your child your last name, I did! You will be very limited in terms of decisions for your child ie school etc. I would say go as far as putting "father unknown" on the birth certificate. Right now I'm trying to get my daughter a passport so we can travel and home affairs not only requires his I.D. But his presence at the offices. It's a pain in the ass. Empower yourself honey, don't make a sentimental, emotional decision. -
My son has my exs last name and I get called mrs so and so all the time even after I've corrected them multiple times.
Quoting _coldcoffee_:
uhhh, no lol didnt think of it that way
Quoting yezay:
Do you want to be called mrs "his last name" your child's entire life? If not use your last name!!! -
I wish my kids had my last name. Give the baby yours! -
Use your last name you can always hyphenate his on -
lol that would be so funny XD if its a girl, her name would be Avalon Shay Lewis-Armstrong!! good grief lol
Quoting LifeCafe42:
Use your last name you can always hyphenate his on -
im a very emotional person, always have been. not boo-hoo over spilled milk kind but not far from it lol im just tryin to be nice and i get taken advantage of for it, but when it comes to my baby, i want to do whats best for it, daddys optional.
that sounds like a real pain..
Quoting MsPopo:
Honey. Give your child your last name, I did! You will be very limited in terms of decisions for your child ie school etc. I would say go as far as putting "father unknown" on the birth certificate. Right now I'm trying to get my daughter a passport so we can travel and home affairs not only requires his I.D. But his presence at the offices. It's a pain in the ass. Empower yourself honey, don't make a sentimental, emotional decision. -
that's what I did!!!!!!!! no father in my sons birth certificate or life!!!!!!
[plus if you will want to get him a passport, they will ask you to get permition from both parents. that is if the father is on the birth certificate.- such a waste!!!! SO MUCH BETTER BEING IN CONTROL OF YOUR OWN CHILD, I MEAN THE FATHER WOULDN'T CARE OR DO ANYTING EITHER WAY. WHAT'S THE POINT!!...]
And I am happy with my decision!!! it's hard, but you get lots of help from people who do care!!
[plus if he will have the fathers last name, and youre a single mom. and dad wouldn't be involved. it will be kinda hard knowing your the mom with different last names. i think. im not sure how it works!]
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and thats exactly why i didn't put his name!!!!!!! for gods sake you don't need that asshole!!
it's an amazing feeling knowing your child is ALL YOURS!!! :)
Quoting MsPopo:
Honey. Give your child your last name, I did! You will be very limited in terms of decisions for your child ie school etc. I would say go as far as putting "father unknown" on the birth certificate. Right now I'm trying to get my daughter a passport so we can travel and home affairs not only requires his I.D. But his presence at the offices. It's a pain in the ass. Empower yourself honey, don't make a sentimental, emotional decision. -
idk what hes doin.. first hes all like 'fuck this shit' and not wantin anythin to do with it, then hes like i want pics and visitation and wants to stick around for a while, then i started makin my baby registry and asked if he wanted to see what i put on there, and hes like 'eh' and i said 'so you dont' and hes like 'why, idrc, so if you want to show me show me' ....
Quoting Emiliush:
that's what I did!!!!!!!! no father in my sons birth certificate or life!!!!!!
[plus if you will want to get him a passport, they will ask you to get permition from both parents. that is if the father is on the birth certificate.- such a waste!!!! SO MUCH BETTER BEING IN CONTROL OF YOUR OWN CHILD, I MEAN THE FATHER WOULDN'T CARE OR DO ANYTING EITHER WAY. WHAT'S THE POINT!!...]
And I am happy with my decision!!! it's hard, but you get lots of help from people who do care!!
[plus if he will have the fathers last name, and youre a single mom. and dad wouldn't be involved. it will be kinda hard knowing your the mom with different last names. i think. im not sure how it works!]