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Veronica_Armijo
Help!
December 7, 2012 at 11:55 PM
So my daughter's father decided just this year to take me to court for custody. She is 5 and up until this point has never made an effort or wanted to see her or spend time with her. We have had several court hearings and have been doing visitations and I thought that everythingwas going well. Now he told me today that he wants to terminate his parental rights and that he wants nothing more to do with her. He also wants me to tell her about his decision. I feel that she is to little to be told that she is not wanted . I don't even know what to tell her or how to approach this. I love my daughter I only want what's best for her. Now I'm not even sure what that is.

Replies

  • ms.momo3
    December 7, 2012 at 11:56 PM
    He legally can not terminate his rights. You have to request it. Tell him to suck it up he owes u money.
  • strngenough
    December 7, 2012 at 11:58 PM
    That is horrible. Sadly in a lot of states he can. They may still make him pay. I'd talk to a child developmental psychologist and ask them what to say/do. That's so fucked up.
  • Veronica_Armijo
    December 8, 2012 at 12:06 AM
    I have spoken with my attorney he can terminate his rights but him and my daughter will have to attend counseling before the court grants that request. Either way he will still be obligated to provide child support and health insurance.
  • strngenough
    December 8, 2012 at 12:11 AM
    Well that's one good thing. I don't think it's about him not wanting her. I wouldn't pose it like that. I think it's more about there are good men and bad men in this world. It's important to try to find the good ones.( I wish I had.) Adults are complicated and don't always make sense.
    I'll have to use a similar speech when I explain to my son someday why he doesn't have grandparents and aunts/uncles. My family are all addicts and they won't be around my son. I want him to only be surrounded by healthy, stable, trustworthy adults.

    Really sorry for both of your heartache.



    Quoting Veronica_Armijo:

    I have spoken with my attorney he can terminate his rights but him and my daughter will have to attend counseling before the court grants that request. Either way he will still be obligated to provide child support and health insurance.

  • Veronica_Armijo
    December 8, 2012 at 12:16 AM
    The not wanting her were his words. He actually wanted me to tell her that but I am not willing to do that to her she doesn't need that kind of heartache.
  • Jazmyn1
    by Jazmyn1
    December 8, 2012 at 12:46 AM

    I am so very sorry you and your daughter are going through this I personally wouldnt say anything to her just randomly shes so young its so easy for kids to think its their fault. I would consult a proffessional on how to approach this. I wouldnt say "your daddy doesnt want to see you any more" obviously. Honestly HE should man up and tell her its his decision I have no idea how to tell a child something like that I pray for you and your daughter

  • Veronica_Armijo
    December 8, 2012 at 2:13 AM
    Thank you. I don't even know where to go from here. I feel like he's being selfish and thinking only of himself. I honestly am at a loss as to how to approach this whole situation.
  • Robsessed98
    December 8, 2012 at 11:56 AM
    I would never tell her she wasnt wanted. Just tell her daddy had to go away. Thats all she needs to know or will understand at this point. She is young enough that she will adapt and will forget him to some extent.

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