Single Moms

GracelynJoysMom
wasnt expecting that to happen (no bashing!).....UPDATE
December 7, 2012 at 8:09 PM
So if anyone has got a chance to read any of my previous posts it will explain how me and my baby daddy has been. But I will sum it up .... Our dd is 16 months old. Bd and I were best friends for 3 1/2 years before we started dating then got pregnant. Well he has kinda been in and out of her life since she was born. Well we have been getting a long very well lately and he came over last night and we put yo the Christmas tree and watched a movie with our daughter then put her to bed together. After she was sleeping we were just talking about everything and our feeling and that kind of stuff. Well one thing led to another and he ended up staying the night and we had sex. I hope that we can be together and give our family a second chance. I love him so much and I'm always so happy when we are together. He brings out the best in me. Only problem is he has another baby on the way from his on again off again relationship....ugh I just don't know what to think or how to feel about everything. Id really like some advice! No bashing please!



UPDATE....HE HAS BEEN OVER 3 TIMES SINCE THAT HAPPENED. WE HAVEN'T SEX AGAIN BUT WE HAVE KISSED. HIM AND GF AREN'T GETTING ALONG BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T LIKE IT THAT HE COMES OVER HERE AND SEES HIS DAUGHTER. HE EVEN CAME OVER WITH HIM MOM ONE NIGHT SO THAT SHE COULD SEE DD AND HIS GF STILL GOT PISSED CAUSE HE WAS AROUND ME. BUT, HE SAID IDC WHAT SHE THINKS, IF SHE ISN'T HAPPY THEN SHE CAN LEAVE BECAUSE I AM NOT GOING TO ABANDON MY DAUGHTER AGAIN . HE KNOWS THAT HE FUCKED UP IN THE PAST AND I THINK HE'S TRYING TO MAKE UP FOR IT NOW. HE IS COMING OVER TODAY TO SPEND THE DAY WITH US UNTIL HE HAS TO GO INTO WORK AT 5PM THEN AFTER WORK WE ARE TAKING DD TO LOOK AT CHRISTMAS LIGHTS! I CAN'T WAIT! & HE WAS OVER ALL DAY YESTERDAY TILL I HAD TO GO TO WORK. IDK.... I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. I DO NOT THINK THAT HIS INTENTIONS ARE TO JUST SLEEP WITH ME. I THINK HE IS JUST VERY CONFUSED LATELY. BUT, WITH HIM BEING OVER ALOT AND US TEXTING EVERYDAY ALL DAY WHEN WE AREN'T TOGETHER I THINK WE ARE WORKING ON BUILDING OUR RELATIONSHIP THAT WE ONCE HAD. I JUST PRAY THAT WE CAN MAKE THIS WORK FOR OUR FAMILY & BECAUSE HE WAS MY FIRST LOVE AND MY BEST FRIEND. I WANT TO BE WITH HIM. I LOVE HOW I FEEL WHEN WE ARE TOGETHER AND HOW HAPPY HE MAKES ME AND MY DD.

Replies

  • strngenough
    December 16, 2012 at 12:14 PM
    If he wants to try he needs to dump the gf. You aren't really committing if you have a back up.
  • uriahadel
    December 16, 2012 at 12:14 PM
    I did the same thing but in my experience he will never change, he still hasn't.. he is about to turn 37 and he has on and off again girlfriends... I was his only wife, and he is still doing the same since I divorced him 5 years ago... I have known him for seven and a half years, and we have a six year old together, and the same chemistry when we are together but he is a player and always will be
  • PumpkinSpice8
    December 16, 2012 at 12:22 PM
    I agree with you... But it almost seems that op is the backup. Sounds like things aren't going well with BDs gf so he's testing the waters with the op to see if she'll easily let him come back should things go farther down hill with his gf. (and then of course that's not a real commitment so when he finds something "better" he will be gone again).

    I really advise you op to be careful. It sounds like you really really love him and I am afraid you'll end up broken hearted. I would go a little more gradual on the texts and visits. There's no reason to rush this broken relationship. Don't let him mend the wounds he's caused you so easily because he very well could cause them again. As they say- you fool me once shame on you, you fool me twice shame on me.


    Quoting strngenough:

    If he wants to try he needs to dump the gf. You aren't really committing if you have a back up.

  • PNK2012
    by PNK2012
    December 16, 2012 at 12:56 PM

     I think the question that needs to be asked is what do you want what does he want do they match and how are you going go about meeting that goal. Sometimes in life we get caught up in what we want not realizing what we sometimes want is not good for us that sometimes we hold on to old familiar because we are scared to step outside that security of old familiar. I think you really need to have a serious talk with him, if he feels he wants to be a family with you then he needs to first get his house in order separate from his current girlfriend get on neutral grounds and not in your house. You also have to ask how will you deal with his current GF being pregnant and when she has the baby him going over there to see his child will he be doing the same thing to you that he is doing to her now. When things are complicated going in it only gets worst. Be very careful..

  • GracelynJoysMom
    December 16, 2012 at 1:35 PM
    I have thought about that and that's another one of my concerns...I am just very confused.


    Quoting PNK2012:

     I think the question that needs to be asked is what do you want what does he want do they match and how are you going go about meeting that goal. Sometimes in life we get caught up in what we want not realizing what we sometimes want is not good for us that sometimes we hold on to old familiar because we are scared to step outside that security of old familiar. I think you really need to have a serious talk with him, if he feels he wants to be a family with you then he needs to first get his house in order separate from his current girlfriend get on neutral grounds and not in your house. You also have to ask how will you deal with his current GF being pregnant and when she has the baby him going over there to see his child will he be doing the same thing to you that he is doing to her now. When things are complicated going in it only gets worst. Be very careful..


  • PNK2012
    by PNK2012
    December 16, 2012 at 1:42 PM

     Take your time there is no rush. Allow him to be apart of your daughters lifer but hold the breaks on letting him 100% in your life, I know its a hard balance. But take yourself out of the equation sometime allow him and his mom to get your daughter without you it gives you time to yourself to think.

     

    And would never bash on you I am here to empower nurture encourage love respect endure share with you.

    Hugs.

  • KRIZZ25
    by KRIZZ25
    December 16, 2012 at 1:50 PM
    it sounds to me like he just wont a fwb ..u wont more..dont fall for the fwb line..thats just free ass.

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