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trixie091402
Being Single and Pregnant
November 17, 2012 at 11:23 PM
My boyfriend decided to end things, i have tried everything i can think of to salvage this. We cannot seem to get on same page. I'm 22 wks pregnant and feel incredibly guilty that i don't think of this baby as a blessing. I have a 10 year old son that i have been raising on my own. I know how tough it is to be a single parent and now it is happening again. No idea how i am going to mmanage an infant. I feel desolate and maybe a little suicidal. This life of mine has never been easy and i have battled. When do u say enough is enough, and just give up. Logically, i know this is irrational and wrong, but i think how living is the hard part and dying iwould be so easy. Just disappear.

Replies

  • ZakkarysMom
    November 17, 2012 at 11:29 PM
    Your 10 yr old wont have a mother anymore and your unborn child wont even have a chance at life. Do you really want to do that?
  • sid1083
    by sid1083
    November 18, 2012 at 2:28 AM
    Do you have any family or friends for support? Will bd be there for this child or would you be willing to consider placement for adoption?
  • LeeLee375
    November 18, 2012 at 10:16 AM
    1-800-273-8255

    Call them, it's the crisis and suicide prevention hotline.

    And then talk to your OB, too! They'll get you on antidepressants.

    Don't go on feeling this way without reaching out for more help! Don't leave your ten year old in a situation like that, you can get help and things will get better! You can be happy! You can see your older son growing up and being a helpful big brother, and see this new baby getting its first tooth, learning to crawl, saying "mom mom mom" for the first time! You can't miss out on all these things.
  • strngenough
    November 18, 2012 at 12:46 PM
    I felt that way when my husband left me at 11weeks pregnant. Most days I'm fine, most days excited to meet my son, but somedays I do feel just like you. He's back now, but the anger and hurt is still there. I can tell you that I honestly felt like that for about 7 weeks. I just felt robbed and cheated. You'll go on. We all do. The adoption idea is not a bad one. I thought of it myself when everything happened. Give yourself time to fall in love with the baby and please allow yourself to be angry for a bit. My doc tried to put me on antidepressants and I told him I don't have a chemical imbalance I have some real shit going on. I let myself be angry and selfish for a bit and it really helped me. I can't promise it'll be good, but you'll be fine. You could always give him primary custody. You have options and time. I tell everyone I won't know exactly how I feel and what I want to do until the baby is born.
  • rnchelle93
    November 18, 2012 at 2:51 PM

    You don't give up. You are too far along to abort, but adoption, if that is something you would consider, is an option. Other than that, get some help. Talk to a therapist, find a support group. You are dealing with a terrible situation and you are pregnant, which makes you even more emotional and volitile. Please get some help. Good luck.

  • uriahadel
    November 18, 2012 at 3:04 PM
    You know, I don't mean to be harsh, but this is the time to suck it up and deal with it. And you were not married and you knew what would happen if you had sex...

    I had a three year old and turned around and got pregnant again, and had a difficult pregnancy... I went into preterm labor at 5 months and was in and out of the hospital until I had her... I was not married, and my bf wanted to be there but he didn't want to get a job and so I left him and I had no support... when I went into the hospital a couple hours away, I had to leave my three year old with friends for a week and that is the longest she has ever been away from me and cps was called...

    It could be worse and I know your situation isn't easy but you have it a lot better then I did, and if I could make it through it then you can too... it is time to stop feeling sorry for yourself, to buck up, and be there for your ten year old and take on the responsibility of having to raise your baby... believe it or not it does get better... talk to your doctor about your feelings, but don't sit there and mope about how bad it is when it could be worse... I went into preeclampsia after taking shots for four days for my baby's lungs to mature and they thought we held off long enough and that I was 38 weeks but they were wrong on my due date, and my baby was born prematurely and as issues for a year... she is now 28 months, and is much better but she does have her breathing issues but she is healthy... focus on the positives, not the negatives, and seek help...
    There is nothing you can do about him except put him on cs but you may never see that but there is something you can do about you and your children... this isn't the end of the world, and your baby is a blessing... look at the glass as half full and not half empty

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