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Feel like ex-mil still plans to take my kids
October 23, 2012 at 2:01 AM
When i picked up my kids on saturday. The ex fil and mil always say something. They use about two days out of the month because they "don't want any fighting". He visits the kids at their house and they sometimes ask if he called me without their knowledge. If they want to run his life fine. Their controlling nature took a huge toll on the marriage. But oh well, that is done.

I was trying to get my two year old his medicine and they mentioned they are leaving town and asked if i wanted ex to visit. I said that is up to him but I am the one being the parent and doing my share of the parenting and his. Ex-mil mumbles "yeah For Now" and ex fil starts saying how they appreciate all i do blah blah. That "for now" really bothered me.

From the moment I had our first son ex mil was urging him to divorce me and try to get custody. Then when we argued she would give him money to stay at a hotel as long as he promised to leave. I was five months pregnant with second son. He was gone for a week and from then forward was constantly leaving.

When we were divorcing he would tell me "when they are older they can decide to live with me". Then i got custody and she is being super nice. It seems she still wants to try to get my kids away from me.

Any thoughts? I doubt she will ever stop. During the divorce she even called cps. They closed the case but this is exhausting. Is there anything I can do?


  • ImaSoulMom
    October 27, 2012 at 12:40 AM
    Thank you. I just ordered the book "divorce poison". Them playimg games with the kids bothers me. A lot of smart ladies here giving great advice. Recently had to back up my messages because lost them. I do have pictures of them not cancelling visits and leaving the boys to wait in june temps here about 102 degrees. I kept them hydrated and took pics of them at the meeting spot so they could not say i was denying visits . They did this at least six times. So direspectful to the little ones. It might seem funny to them but that is bullcrap to mess with my babies.

    Quoting sav820:

    You dont have to allow them to see them..HE(daddy) gets Visitation....NOT his parents,( unless the court & you arranged that deal)  they're lucky they get to see them......And just because he doesnt see them doesnt mean he can transfere his time to them..NOOOO.....In MOST states there are " NO "Grand parents RIGHTS....Find out what your state laws are...  And then decide.  Don't let them scare you  like someone else said, YOU must be proven UNFIT in a court & if you're a good mom it would never happen...So dont allow them to manipulate you..Good Luck!! 

     P.S. Plus you do NOT want them playing your children against you, or talking bad about you....Buy a cam ( they sell many that look like kids tags for luggage) and hook it to the childrens bag when they visit....and spy /record, and see what the say to your children....

  • LifeCafe42
    October 27, 2012 at 12:56 AM

    Quoting tyfry7496:

    Stop letting them see you boys without you there. And stop letting them get to you, it's what they want.
  • sniklefritz
    October 27, 2012 at 7:44 PM

    My  impulse resistance is VERY low...I'd have to sit on my hands..or sit on them while pushing their faces into cow dung...

    Quoting ImaSoulMom:

    Ha ha! Not going to lie....i get the urge! ;)

    Quoting sniklefritz:

    God. they sound ignorant,,how do you keep from slapping the dog snot out of them??

    Quoting ImaSoulMom:

    This has been since my first son was born. When she said "spare the rod spoil the child" i told her i didn't believe in spanking. She said to put q tips in my son's ears and i cleaned them with a wash cloth. For differences like these, they would tell me that they could take my kids. They are used to their son doing what they ask without question. Disagreeing made them pretty furious. Even though her son is an absentee father, they are still convinced their parenting methods are 100% right.

    Quoting Jennyanne322:

    Why do they want you away from your children? Have you ever given them reason to feel you are an unfit mother?

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