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NO judging.
My electricity got turned off today. I was waiting until Friday to pay it and it was only 7 days late. My brother went home and the lights were off and he called my parents. So now everyone knows. I borrowed the money from my brother (he pays half the rent but I pay ALL of the utilities plus the other half) to get it turned back on so they are in route to do that today.
I feel like the lowest shit on the earth right now. My dad called me about it and told me that he is going to go pick my son up from daycare and they will keep him today and tomorrow.
I have a CD that I've been using to save up for a house, but it didnt make sense to incur all the penalties for a measly $129.83. If I had known they would cut my damn electricity off, I would have just bit the bullet and paid it.
Its so embarrassing, ya know? My mom is always throwing it in my face that I picked the wrong guy to have a kid with. He hasn't paid CS in months. I have no idea where he is right now and last time I checked his phone was off. I refuse to beg him for anything.
I'm really good at pretending to have everything together. I don't ask anybody for anything. I was doing really well until the past two months but lately I've been struggling. I'm a really private person. Now I feel like once again, my failure is on display for the rest of the world. I hate myself right now. I hate my brother for telling my parents. I hate my ex for not paying CS.
I have to tutor tonight. I really don't feel like it but its not right to penalize someone else for my personal failure. If it wasn't for that, I would leave work early, go in my room and just sleep until tomorrow. I'm so frustrated right now.
Replies
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I know that you are frustrated; the time that my lights got turned off my twins were 2; my oldest 8 and it was November. Being that I live in a small town and I knew people that worked for the electric company, the word got out. I felt horrible. But you know what: sometimes things happen. We pray that it doesn't happen again and seek wisdom from the situation in order to not repeat it.
You are not the lowest sh!t on earth!!! Sometimes the worst happens to the best of us! I'm good at pretending that its all together, too; you know what-- fake it til you make it!
It'll be okay girl.
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No, I hadn't called them until today. The CSR said that this is the third time that its been late in the past six months. I have never paid it more than a week late although I do usually call and let them know. Every time I call they act like it isn't a big deal so I didnt think it was...I dont want to pay my bill late. I would pay it ahead if I reasonably could.
The only upside is that the CSR waived the $75 deposit that would be applied to my account for having it disconnected.
Quoting conniejo75:
Had you called electric company? They usually don't shut off if only 7 days late. Here it has to be 30 days AND they then have to send a shut off notice before that happens. I have had to call a few times to get an extension of a few days without issue. -
your family is going overbored I know how u feel I beat myself up about things also BUT it does happen hun mine was shut off as well and my son is 10 and it was only for a day fortunately I had a friend to borrow the money to me if thats the worst that hapens to you you are doing wonderful!! Chin up God Bless