Single Moms

ballerossandra
why should i file for custody?
October 12, 2012 at 12:51 AM

my son has my last name

his dad pays child support but has barely seen his son

he texts every now and then but nothing consistent so I can't really say that he will fight it if I request full custody

he probably wont mind

I am more than happy to have a parenting plan and visitation set up but it seems that he may not care

so shall I still file and waste time in court?

 

Replies

  • BelleVernonGirl
    October 12, 2012 at 1:32 AM

    I suggest you do b/c if there is no custody agreement then your sons dad could take him and there's nothing you can do about it.  It's not considered kidnapping or anything without the custody order. 

  • devynsmommy09
    October 12, 2012 at 7:00 AM

    It depends on the state. In my state if the parents are unmarried the child belongs to the woman. Filing for child support also legally establishes her as the custodial parent.

    Call a lawyer and fact check that in your state. Any decent lawyer will answer that for free over the phone.

    If that isnt true in your state...The down side of not getting custody is that if he ever does become interested in the child, he can abduct him (take him w/o permission, not bring him back from a visit) and you wouldnt have any legal ground to have him arrested or get your baby back.

  • kagegirl
    October 12, 2012 at 7:55 AM
    You should anyway, you never know what will happen in the future.
  • unspecified42
    October 12, 2012 at 9:51 AM

    Because if your son's father decides to take him to the park one day and never returns, you'll have no legal reprocussion without an actual custody agreement. 

  • devynsmommy09
    October 12, 2012 at 10:54 AM

    Exactly!

    Quoting unspecified42:

    Because if your son's father decides to take him to the park one day and never returns, you'll have no legal reprocussion without an actual custody agreement. 


  • CountryStrong84
    October 12, 2012 at 10:55 AM
    Oh lord. Because when he gets a new girlfriend and wants to play house, you want something solid.
  • jessi2girls
    October 12, 2012 at 11:00 AM

    I would go to a mediation hearing with your ex, and get it in writting that you have sole custody and will work out visitation on a day to day basis.... this wouldn't change anything other than to have it in writting... better safe than sorry if he decides somewhere down the road he wants to play daddy and keep the kid from you.

  • Jekasica
    October 12, 2012 at 11:02 AM
    What state do you live in?


    Quoting devynsmommy09:

    It depends on the state. In my state if the parents are unmarried the child belongs to the woman. Filing for child support also legally establishesh her as the custodial parent.

    Call a lawyer and fact check that in your state. Any decent lawyer will answer that for free over the phone.

    If that isnt true in your state...The down side of not getting custody is that if he ever does become interested in the chil, he can abduct him (take him w/o permission, not bring him back from a visit) and you wouldnt have any legal ground to have him arrested or get your baby back.

  • devynsmommy09
    October 12, 2012 at 11:08 AM

    South Carolina; the custody thing is true in Ohio too.  I used to live in Cleveland.

    Quoting Jekasica:

    What state do you live in?


    Quoting devynsmommy09:

    It depends on the state. In my state if the parents are unmarried the child belongs to the woman. Filing for child support also legally establishesh her as the custodial parent.

    Call a lawyer and fact check that in your state. Any decent lawyer will answer that for free over the phone.

    If that isnt true in your state...The down side of not getting custody is that if he ever does become interested in the chil, he can abduct him (take him w/o permission, not bring him back from a visit) and you wouldnt have any legal ground to have him arrested or get your baby back.


  • faerie75
    October 12, 2012 at 11:55 AM

     idk about your state, but in mine, if hes on teh birth cert, he has equal rights without custody put in place. in other words, he could take your kid and nothing would be done. and possession is 9/10 of the law. so to cover my own ass, id do it.

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