I need to know how do you cope with being a single mom? I will be basically be a single mom within a few weeks. Sometimes it doesn't bother me but sometimes it does...I didn't make this baby by myself but my child's father is just a mean, spiteful and cold-hearted person. I love my daughter and will die trying to give her the world. But it just gets so lonely sometimes. I know that I'm a good person and deserve happiness. But sometimes I honestly feel like I messed up in life or that I'm being punished by the child's father because he left.
And I just for once would like to know what real love looks and feels like. My father committed suicide when I was 8 months old so I NEVER knew him. Now my mom is beginning to go through a divorce because my step dad just didn't do...ANYTHING!!
I know some of you are probably thinking why would you put yourself in the predicament but come on no one can ever tell how someone will be. People change and their true colors come out.
I mean my mom is a strong person and she says that she is happy to be getting a divorce. She says she feels free and not burdened or held down by his lazy ways of doing..NOTHING. She says she will get married again because she believes in Love. My mom has gone 18 years of being a parent. But I have a long way to go and I don't know how I can get over being a single mom.
I graduate this semester in May but sometimes I feel like its all for nothing because I got pregnant. I was always focused in school. I was on the Dean's List, received a FULL tuition scholarship, Honor Roll all through grade school. Although please don't get me wrong, I will try my hardest to keep up my grades and find and land a great job. But sometimes it just gets so lonely. I just feel like how did I get my smart educated self into a situation like this? Can anybody relate?
I know how you feel. I'm a single mom of three kids. It's hard and I get lonely sometimes but you get used to it. I had my 1st baby a month before I graduated from high school. I graduated with honors but have yet to go to college 4 years later. I guess the only thing I can say is you get used to it. My kids are my world and I just try to stay focused on them rather than anything else. They keep me pretty busy.
March 15, 2011 at 9:18 PM
YES! I am so fortunate to have my mom living with me and helping out with household tasks and carting the kids around when I have to work even though she herself works full time. Sometimes I think I will be alone forever, but I know someday I will find someone to share my life with. But more important than finding someone for me is raising my children. Although I would love for them to have a real father figure in their lives, I don't want to get mixed up in another complicated relationship. Sounds like you are still pretty young too, which must be very difficult. I was in my late 20's when I had my children and am now 35 and I still find it overwhelming at times. Good luck and keep your chin up.
March 15, 2011 at 9:20 PM
My situation is different than yours...I was married for 16 years and in an abusive marriage...but it gets better. I dont have to answer to him anymore and I can manage my finances MUCH better than he ever did...I love being single. I hope you will continue with school...it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders.
by JanaeMarieMarch 15, 2011 at 9:24 PM
I am only 24 I'm about to graduate from college. And I already told myself I was going to graduate school in a year or two. I only have a month before I receive my college degree so. But I guess if my mom can deal with it all. I can as well. She has always been my rock.
by Marie682March 15, 2011 at 9:26 PM
I understand how you feel I am a married single mom. I had two kids by my husband he chose to cheat on me and leave me for one of my friends. I cried every night because the hardest thing in the world was to watch my one yr old see his daddy move out the house. But I got myself together, got a new apartment and started over with my own apartment and made new memories with my two kids. I ajctually enjoy just a being mom and not having a man. It is quiet and most of all I dont have to worry about some man and his feelings. I have a 2yr old, 11mth old and is 8mths pregnant by a man that is my best friend and all that matters is he will help me take care of my baby. I was was a wife for years and I am enjoying being single. With all the things that go on with my children I have no time left for no one else. But I do want to be a wife again just when the time is right.
by LovinLivMarch 15, 2011 at 9:28 PMI'm so tired of it! I've been a single mom for most of my daughter's life and it's not easy! But you cling to your kid's smile when it gets too hard, that's how I get by. She makes it worth it
March 15, 2011 at 9:39 PM
Call me crazy, but I enjoy not having a SO. A relationship is a lot of work, and a lot of times, it's like adding another kid into the mix. My 2 kids are enough for me. I can go do whatever I want, when I want, and have no one to discuss it with. When the kids go to bed, I get some "me" time. No one else to cook for, or clean up after.
Once you have your baby, you won't have much time to feel lonely. The baby will keep you busy. Just enjoy the little moments while they are small. They will be grown in what seems like a blink of an eye. Enjoy her while you can! There will always be men, but your daughter will only be a baby once.
WHAT???? Are you kidding me??? You are still in a wonderful position and don't even know it. You GRADUATE in May. I had to drop out of college with 7 more classes to go before I get my Bachelors degree. You are going about this all wrong. You are so busy looking at what you DON'T have instead of concentrating on what you do have. You have an education behind you, so your already ahead of the "single mom" game. You have a mother that can help. Do you know how many women are married and still feel like a single mom. It's better in my opinion that a man shows his face upfront than later on down the line. why put your child through that? You have to look at all the greatness in store for you and the blessings will come. I love being a single mom because I don't have to consult with anyone, or someone getting on my nerves because we have 2 different parenting styles. You have a healthy baby on the way your smart and you can think for yourself so go ahead and be the best single mom you can be!!!
by LifeCafe42March 15, 2011 at 9:52 PMYes it gets tiring but then I think of how much worse it would be if my ex was around. You are doing great. You will have good and bad days. Good luck!