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JanaeMarie
Anybody tired of being a single mom?
March 15, 2011 at 9:12 PM

I need to know how do you cope with being a single mom? I will be basically be a single mom within a few weeks. Sometimes it doesn't bother me but sometimes it does...I didn't make this baby by myself but my child's father is just a mean, spiteful and cold-hearted person. I love my daughter and will die trying to give her the world. But it just gets so lonely sometimes. I know that I'm a good person and deserve happiness. But sometimes I honestly feel like I messed up in life or that I'm being punished by the child's father because he left.

And I just for once would like to know what real love looks and feels like. My father committed suicide when I was 8 months old so I NEVER knew him. Now my mom is beginning to go through a divorce because my step dad just didn't do...ANYTHING!!

I know some of you are probably thinking why would you put yourself in the predicament but come on no one can ever tell how someone will be. People change and their true colors come out.

I mean my mom is a strong person and she says that she is happy to be getting a divorce. She says she feels free and not burdened or held down by his lazy ways of doing..NOTHING. She says she will get married again because she believes in Love.  My mom has gone 18 years of being a parent. But I have a long way to go and I don't know how I can get over being a single mom.

I graduate this semester in May but sometimes I feel like its all for nothing because I got pregnant. I was always focused in school. I was on the Dean's List, received a FULL tuition scholarship, Honor Roll all through grade school. Although please don't get me wrong, I will try my hardest to keep up my grades and find and land a great job. But sometimes it just gets so lonely. I just feel like how did I get my smart educated self into a situation like this? Can anybody relate?

Replies

  • d-w-l4now34
    November 25 at 11:44 PM
    Hi kelly I wanted to respond you dont appear to be weak I appreciate hearing your story bc I dont have a support system either bcmy adopted parents have been dead long time and when they were alive they werent much help to me. my real mom has major mental issues she has never been in my life and im stil dealing with that and my bro n sis we dont talk idk y but we dont talk. my babydaddies are a piece of $$$$ my oldest is always bragging to me about his wife he got remarried and everynow n then throws a fit toward me just to piss me off and tries to get me back with him. n the other one you can read on my title page cheating and selfish babydaddies. I hope things get better for you and your child as well. We all have to sray strong and I feel you on the screaming thing my kids omg I love them to def but I want to pull my hair out sometimes its very stressful bc I barely go anywhere for fun. One time I went to the movies to see No Good Deed I was worried that it might make me look desperate, lonely, or someone who cant get a man but I went anyways n I had a blast plus the movie was awesome n there was another lady n there by herself too . Hearng your story helped me not take my babydaddy back bc I have been pacing back n forth with that he cheated and I wanted to forgive n take him back but I deserve better n im scsred he might do it again so thank you for sharing your story. Stay in prayer and stay positive n hey maybe try going to a movie alone just to get that peace of mind just for a few hours.

    Quoting Kelly1308:

    I am going to say it like it is....Maybe this makes me sound week but here it goes....I am a 42 year old mom of an 8 year old soon to be 9 in a week.....his dad is not involved in his life but 3 or 4 hours a month......I have no support system where I live and even if I moved back to San Antonio where I am from, I wouldn't have any there either as I am not close to my family at all.  I tend to have turned into an intravert since my ex cheated came back and left again for the same woman.  I am a Teacher and work extremely hard with difficult children all day so when I get home I need a break.  My son wants my attn and all I want to do is scream at the top of my lungs that I need help, peace, and time to myself which I never get and forget a babysitter because I can't afford one.  Anyway, I have many days that I am absolutely tired of being a single mom with no support system at all in place.  You are lucky your mom will be helping. 

  • remsed
    by remsed
    November 26 at 2:39 AM
    I honestly can relate. I'm a new mom - my son is 2 months and his dad and I moved in together "officially" after we found out I was pregnant. It's been the worst mistake I've made ever since! But I came to realize just this past weekend that he actually broke up with me without even saying the words! (Long story). But even through the pain he has (and still is) putting me through I still believe in love. It's something you just can't describe... when two people really feel it everything just comes naturally and feels good... this guy sort of explains what a good relationship is.. check it out..

    http://mdavis11.wordpress.com/2012/11/20/the-importance-of-spiritual-compatibility-in-a-relationship-pt-i/
  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1
    November 26 at 2:45 AM
    I can relate and it does get lonely I mean who doesn't want the happy family but it doesn't come so easy for everyone no matter how good of a person you are. You sound like you are doing great! I'd just focus on what's important and that's you and your children the rest will fall into place :)
  • diaperstodating
    November 26 at 2:57 AM
    I am just here to see who Bumped this old post.
  • hargonagain
    November 26 at 3:13 AM
    I think that if you focus on your kids and doing everything you can to ensure your future you don't have time to worry about being single. My ex and I were together for 6 years. I always told him from the time I met him that my plan was to adopt a child. He was with me through two failed adoptions and knew how important being a Mom was to me.

    When my son was born and I got the call to pick him up, my ex freaked out and was so angry, he told me that he hoped my baby died! Of course I ended it and he kept trying to get back together with me, saying he didn't really mean it, yada, Yada. So I have been completely single for 3 years now. I don't date etc. I focus on my child and my work and doing fun things when we can. I will never get married again and I don't plan on dating either.

    I am very independent do it is easy for me. I love that I don't have to give a crap about what anyone else wants to do lol. I also love that I can go anywhere I want or do whatever I feel like doing and don't have to ask for input.

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