Single Moms

Hopesmomma92106
disgusted
October 16, 2007 at 11:12 AM

I am done...I am through.

Last night I was over at Tyler's mom doing the normal crying over Tyler talking about him, plannning on the next things I was going to send him. Well she decides to give Hope a bath so I decided to snoop around on her yahoo messenger to find out what Tyler had told her because I wanted to know if she had any other info that I didn't know...well first thing I notice a girl named Christina under the "Tyler" section on the buddylist didn't think anything of it figured she had added a friend in the wrong section. So I go up into archives....wrong thinking...there was a conversation between Christina and his mom....it was like this:

mom: How are you doing sweetie

C: I'm doing ok I guess

M: You don't sound like it, what's wrong

C : I talked to Tyler, and I don't know he was just telling me too much stuff again....he just doesn't realize it upsets me.

M: what kind of stuff

C; Talking about what they are getting ready to start doing and ......

M: It's ok honey we will make it through this.

It went on and on and on. Now I looked at the buddylist again to see this girl's profile....there is a freaking pic of Tyler and her making out....Now tell me why did his mother not feel it was important to tell me this. Me not being close to her I coud understand it wasn't her place. But I go over there EVERY night and bawl my eyes out and tell her the prayer I pray every night that God would keep him safe, let him know I love him, miss him and am horribly worried about him, and to bring him back to me...she knows that I still love him and as I said the other day....she told me not to give up on him....from certain things he had said to her before he left....WTF.....she is getting an @ss chewing like she has never had handed to her today. I don't know who has hurt me worse her or Tyler. Because one- when you are in a relationship with someone for two years you just don't go out and find someone new like that ESPECIALLY when you tell the girl you have been with that you don't want them waiting for you for 15 months but let some hooker you don't know wait on you????? And for his mother to sit there and hold me while I cry and watch me go through all of this, assure me things will work out and we will be fine....for everything to be lies???

I guess in the end what I thought I had...in the end I never once had...I have wasted two years on him and his stupid family...been there through it all with them...only to get f'ed in the end. What do you all think?


I don't post here often....but I'm at wits end...I just need advice or even support really...thanks.


Replies

  • ame4c
    by ame4c
    October 16, 2007 at 11:29 AM
    O.k. I understand your anger and I would be angry too, but snooping through their messanger is kind of low.  It shows that you don't trust him anyway and you shouldn't be there.  I am currently going through divorce and had a pretty good relationship with my in-laws, but I don't expect them to take my side at all.  I actually expect them to hate me now and don't call them or talk to them.  I'm a reader and when my stbx left me I cleaned the library out of divorce books and several of them mentioned not trusting the in-laws because they will be one sided and it won't be your side. 

    In your case, his mom might be feeding him all this information.  Stuff that could end up hurting you in the end.  At the very least, I would discount her as a friend and a ali.  Stop going over there and move on with your life.  You deserve better anyway.

  • Hopesmomma92106
    October 16, 2007 at 11:45 AM

    Quoting ame4c:

    O.k. I understand your anger and I would be angry too, but snooping through their messanger is kind of low.  It shows that you don't trust him anyway and you shouldn't be there.  I am currently going through divorce and had a pretty good relationship with my in-laws, but I don't expect them to take my side at all.  I actually expect them to hate me now and don't call them or talk to them.  I'm a reader and when my stbx left me I cleaned the library out of divorce books and several of them mentioned not trusting the in-laws because they will be one sided and it won't be your side. 

    In your case, his mom might be feeding him all this information.  Stuff that could end up hurting you in the end.  At the very least, I would discount her as a friend and a ali.  Stop going over there and move on with your life.  You deserve better anyway.



    snooping as in looking for information to condemn him was not my intent. He is deployed at the moment, I was looking for information about what he was doing and how he really was going through emotionally because he sugarcoats everything for me.....he gives it straight to his mother.

    I understand the point about him being her son. However, the fact that she sits there by my side and comforts me and tells me to keep holding on....that she knows this isn't the end for us....then know about this other woman it's completely decietful and wrong. We have been through so much together as well....she would not intentionally feed him things. I trusted her and she has betrayed that trust, whether she wanted to spare my feelings (which in the end it just made it worse) or just didn't want to tell me....it was wrong.

  • taramichelle
    October 16, 2007 at 12:02 PM
    In my experience, once you start feeling like you need to find info on your own, it never good and never gonna change. If you have been waiting two years for this guy to figure it out things and  he will  probably arent going to change. As far as him mom, as unfortunate as it is it is really rare to find a parent that will be brutuality honest about their own children. My mom on the other hand is like that if I have done something wrong she says it likeit is and if my sig. other wants the truth she gives it like it is, but most parents arent like that. If she has been telling you to hang on for 2 years knowing he is doing things with other girls, myadvice don't confide in her anymore. Youdeserve respect and by lying or omitting the truth abouther son, she isnt giving you respect. I say move on and find someone who will appreciate you!

    taramichelle1012

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