Fast fwd to 2014 my daughter really wants a sibling so we are now working with one of the best in IVF treatment and I'm about to start my cycle. We have an 80% chance of this working which is huge for IVF numbers. But I'm worried 6 yrs apart between kids, I'm afraid they will not be close. It still upsets me that the last one failed bc we'd have an almost 4 yr old by now. But anyone with kids 5-6 or more years apart how did your kids do with a new baby? Are they close? I sometimes feel like I let my daughter & husband down by not being able to give them a huge family.
My oldest two are nearly 5 years apart. They are very close, and always have been.
My brother and I are 11 years apart. He was my best friend. (He passed away 6 years ago.) One of my really good friends is 10 years older than his half-sister, and they're really close, too.
I've actually found that closer gaps, like 2-3 years, tend to be less bonded than larger gaps.
I can tell you age has nothing to do with being close. My dd is 7 and the sibling she is closest to is 21 years older than her. Obviously I am the step mom of her brother. I have a brother who is 5 years younger and we are so/so for closeness. I am sure your daughter would be happy to have a sibling to teach and perhaps "mother"in her own way.
My kids are 5 years apart and they are close so close they sometimes sleep in same bed. My first was an ivf and then when I was 4 months pregnant we lost coverage for that. Our second is a surprise baby. When my oldest was 4 he started asking for a baby brother and this was around Christmas and I got pregnant on New Years we joke his brother was his late Christmas present.
Now it's not all lollipops and roses they do annoy each other but what siblings don't. My sister and I were 2 years apart and we fough maybe more then my two but my sister is also bipolar and has been most her life. I have friends with 5 or more age difference and with friends with less and we all have the same issues. Some days they are best friends and next day they hate each other.
There is no perfect age difference just what works best for your family. Can say pluses for us of the age difference are one kid in diapers at the same time, one day care bill (oldest was in kindergarten by the time the baby came) and will only have one in college at a time which also means just like my oldest got the only child full attention when he graduated high school his brother can get that.
Thank you everyone for your replies!! I know DD is going to LOVE being a big sister no matter what! Well she told me she'd be happier if we had twins lol. You gals gave me a lot to ponder over. Thank you again!!! With that we start our IVF cycle officially Monday!!! Super excited!!!