bread bakers of this world have taken all they can take, and they will
stand for it no more! To protest "anti-bread" diets, The United
Federation of Bakers released a toast-scented perfume during
London's Fashion week. Their goal? To make toast "sexy" again.
Begging the question, was toast ever sexy? I mean, folks eat it
in bed, but that's mainly out of laziness ... or so I am told by people who are
DEFINITELY not me.
The bakers might have been better off reminding people that bread is
good for you! In a staunchly carb-scared culture, that's easy to
forget. Bread contains protein, fiber, calcium, iron, copper, zinc, and
manganese. Plus, it's low-cal, yo!
While this weird scheme might not bring bread back into the
good graces of the fashion world, it's definitely got me
thinking about other foods that should have their own scents. As such, I've put
together a list of other companies who should make their own
perfumes. Let's get our delicious stink on, guys!
1. Beef Jerky Companies
It's delicious and an excellent source of protein. Sadly most of us avoid it
because we are not 18-year-old boys on a road-trip. But a sexy spritz of beefy
musky? Meow. Jerky -- it's what's for dinner.
2. Popcorn Companies
I love microwave popcorn so much that the idea of ripping apart the bag to
dab my pressure points with the butter doesn't seem that much of a stretch.
Though granted, spraying on the aroma would probably be much more pleasant.
3. Bagel Companies
Worth it for the design of the bottle alone. If I could
start each day smelling like an everything bagel, I would be happy and everyone
would want to sit next to me in meetings.
4. Cupcake Companies
There's a lot of perfume that tries to smell like dessert. Most of it falls
short of the mark, tending to be sickly sweet and cloying. What I wouldn't give
to sniff the bottled honest-to-god smell of a warm, vanilla cake -- buttery
5. Waffle Companies
Nothing says couture like waffles ... which don't say it at all. It's a pity
too, because I've always thought that Anna Wintour probably
smelled like toasted vanilla and maple syrup.