mom22boys333
Is this a concern?
July 8, 2013 at 12:17 PM

My oldest ds is 4yr and his pedi was worried about his speech.....He speaks fine (he might say some words a little differently like pasghetti, but not often)....He can also speak some french and spanish but he just doesn't have any interest in having a conversation.  My dh isn't worried b/c he said that's how he was until after he started school...He just didn't have anything to say.

Also, it could be b/c he's never away from us so it's not like we can have the "what did you do today?" type conversation.  If you ask him a straight-forward question he always answers.  He's never really around kids his own age just his little brother (18mo)....they have no problem communicating to each other.

Any advice?

Replies

  • ditsyjo
    by ditsyjo
    July 8, 2013 at 2:09 PM
    Asked the dr what exactly he is concerned about
  • girlywifey
    July 8, 2013 at 2:10 PM
    Is the Dr. worried about a speech impediment?
  • frndlyfn
    July 8, 2013 at 3:22 PM

    You can still have conversations about the day even when you are not away from them.  It helps build confidence in their speech.  I would also get the children around their peers for the social aspect and see how they interact with them.

    If the doctor was not more specific, you need to ask for that.   Alot of children i know struggle with spaghetti sometimes through age 7.

  • Arwyn724
    July 8, 2013 at 4:08 PM

    As pp said, hold conversations with him and get him around other children, too.  No one learns how to converse, unless they are given opportunities to do so.  Don't rely on question & answer only.  Try to get him to think about things, form ideas or opinions, use his imagination, and get him to tell you stories.

  • goldilocksbecky
    July 8, 2013 at 5:05 PM

    It sounds like he may not be worried so much about his "speech" (meaning his articulation or ability to pronounce words or make certain sound) as much as his "language" skills.  Both of those would be evaluated and addressed by a speech language pathologist or speech language therapist.  (In other words, they address issues with both speech/articulation and language).

    By the age of 4, he should be able to carry on pretty detailed adult conversations.  Even children who have a more introverted personality will talk in detail to certain people about certain things.  And from the sounds of it, your son isn't doing that, which IS a concern.  If your doctor is suggesting an evaluation, I'd definitely schedule one.  They will assess how well he uses language . . . including his vocabulary, his ability to describe things, etc.

    PLEASE don't put this off or chalk it up to "he just doesn't have anything to talk about" or "that's how Daddy was".   If they do an evaluation and determine that there's not a problem, you've not lost anything except a few hours of time.  But if they do find a delay, then the sooner you can start interventions the better.

    Any child who is living life has something to talk about.  Even if you're together all day, you should still talk about what you are doing, whether that's folding laundry, fixing lunch, watching TV, painting a picture . . . whatever.  Ask him open ended questions that require more than just a one word answer.  Books are also excellent language springboards.  Talk about the pictures.  Ask what he thinks will happen next or what he would do in that situation.  This is the prime age for vocabulary acquisition, so you should almost have a running narrative going for everything you are doing all day long ("let's use a knife to cut up these zucchini, then we'll put thim in the pan") .  You should also read to him every day.

    Please follow your doctor's recommendation.  Good luck! :)


  • mom22boys333
    July 8, 2013 at 6:10 PM

    The Dr. is wooried that he doesn't engage in lengthy conversations.  She mentioned speech therapy but I didn't know if that was necessary (she's recommended things that I thought were absurd before like pulling back foreskin on a newborn) so I wanted some mom's advice.  I've not been around very many 4 yr olds.

    I read to him every day and he'll recite the book back to me.  He'll tell me full episodes of a cartoon or movie he likes but if I ask what "special" thing he wants from the grocery store, he'll say "I don't know" or shrug....I also do the running narrative thing a lot and he'll repeat everything I say but won't add anything (like if I say what do you think we do next?), just shrug or say he doesn't know.

    He has been around other kids a few times (cookouts, playgrounds etc.)...One problem is that it's the older kids who approach him to play, the younger kids ignore him (He's a big guy over 4 ft tall and 50 lbs, so I think the older kids think he's their age)....at a cookout, he played with a 3 yr old and they had no problems communicating.

  • MrsKaufold1990
    July 8, 2013 at 6:51 PM

    You need put him a part time pre school, or play groups or something. 

    At 4 years old he should be able to hold full converstations. 

    My daughter is NEVER away from me, expect for about 20 minutes earlier when I ran to the store. 

    But get him interested, if he watches TV ask him what his shows are about. How hard is that?

  • mom22boys333
    July 8, 2013 at 7:05 PM

    I do ask him and he will give minimum response.....The only preschool things I've found around here are religious-based and we are not...I am looking and try to get him around family his age as much as I can.

    No offense but the "how hard is that" isn't fair.....I'm asking for advice not condescention. 

     


    Quoting MrsKaufold1990:

    You need put him a part time pre school, or play groups or something. 

    At 4 years old he should be able to hold full converstations. 

    My daughter is NEVER away from me, expect for about 20 minutes earlier when I ran to the store. 

    But get him interested, if he watches TV ask him what his shows are about. How hard is that?


     

  • MrsKaufold1990
    July 8, 2013 at 7:07 PM

    It is fair. 

    My five year old, could hold full converstations at 1 1/2.


    Quoting mom22boys333:

    I do ask him and he will give minimum response.....The only preschool things I've found around here are religious-based and we are not...I am looking and try to get him around family his age as much as I can.

    No offense but the "how hard is that" isn't fair.....I'm asking for advice not condescention. 



    Quoting MrsKaufold1990:

    You need put him a part time pre school, or play groups or something. 

    At 4 years old he should be able to hold full converstations. 

    My daughter is NEVER away from me, expect for about 20 minutes earlier when I ran to the store. 

    But get him interested, if he watches TV ask him what his shows are about. How hard is that?





  • NDADanceMom
    July 8, 2013 at 7:12 PM
    Don't you have screenings? In Minnesota all 3 year olds are screened for speech, motor skills, vision, hearing, etc. if your child is behind they offer free services to catch them up.
    I work with 4 year olds that will not be ready for school because they can't communicate.