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tookiepin
Would you be offended or hurt and what do you say to your kid?
June 27, 2013 at 9:12 PM

My daughter is new to her school for over a year now and already has a best friend, they are inseperable. Well her best friend's birthday was today and her parents threw her a birthday party which my daughter was not invited to, even though this same girl was invited and attended my daughters birthday earlier this month. Her best friend never mentioned that she was having a party today until one of the girls invited brought a gift to school. She then proceded to tell Olivia(my daughter) that she wanted to have my daughter another day over for just the two of them to celebrate, but i have heard nothing from the parents to this sort. only three girls were invited one was another best friend and the other two were girls she knows but never plays with, am i loosing my mind does this make any sense? I do not know what to think or say any advice?

Replies

  • CrystalYaris
    June 27, 2013 at 9:19 PM

    I have no idea, but I would be heart broken until I had some answers from the parents on why she wasn't invited. Depending on the answers would determine how I felt, but I would be like "well what can you do? nothing!"

  • ginabeana92
    June 27, 2013 at 9:27 PM

    That's a tough situation! Maybe the parents just wanted their daughter to hang out with her old friends? Try asking your daughter if anything had been going on between the two. If not maybe call the parents and just ask them if they noticed a change in the girls relationship,that Olivia's feelings were hurt because she wasn't invited to her party. Has Olivia told her friend that she was upset by this? 

  • bluebunbun
    June 27, 2013 at 9:28 PM

    How old are the kids? Do you know the parents?

  • frndlyfn
    June 27, 2013 at 9:29 PM

    Given the circumstances who knows.   My dd just did a one on one thing for her birthday rather than a class party.  If you talk to the parents , mention how hurt your dd was to be excluded.

  • calsmom62
    June 27, 2013 at 9:32 PM
    There may be lots of reasons, but if you really want to foster the relationship, have the girl over for a playdate, don't bring.up the party, because it is rude to ask why you didn't get an invite, and see if she accepts the playdate. if the other mom feels awkward about the party maybe she will bring it up.
  • tookiepin
    June 27, 2013 at 9:33 PM

    my daughter is ten and i don't know the parents really well but i have talked to the mom on and off again, i was really surprised because nothing is going on my daughter and her friend are doing just fine that is why this threw me for a loop.

  • tookiepin
    June 27, 2013 at 9:35 PM

    thank you calsmom i will try that and see what happens because i was never comfortable with the idea of asking why she was not invited because it is rude to ask. I will have her friend over or arrange a playdate and see from there thanks to all for you advice :)

  • terpmama
    June 27, 2013 at 10:09 PM
    Could be the mom knew the other mothers better and try could only invite 3. Or maybe the girl could only invite 3 and thought those three would get along better or enjoy the activities better. It could be any number of reasons. Are the three girls invited close friends of each other (like birthday girl is friends with A and A is close with B and C?) I'd go with the play date idea.
  • NDADanceMom
    June 27, 2013 at 10:22 PM
    My daughter plays with a particular little girl at school. The teacher said they are besties. I don't allow the girl over or my daughter over there. I do everything i can to discourage the relationship. My daughter had a huge party for her birthday and this girl was not invited.

    The girl is trouble. 5th grader that has boyfriends, wears makeup, talks about making out. She is a trouble making gossip that one day is nice to my daughter and the next isolating her and backstabbing. She has a 15 year old sister that is pregnant, dad in jail for beating up said sister and mom is oblivious to everything but her cigarettes.
    I can't stand this girl but i don't feel like i should call up her mom and tell her all the reasons. I just do what i can to encourage other friends. If the mom called me i would talk about some of it.
  • Flobrooks
    June 27, 2013 at 11:13 PM

    Probably just a social wannabe Mom inviting the children of friends she wishes to associate with.  Nothing against you, but you are new in town, not the daughter of a pretencious locally prominant family.

     

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