The CafeMom Newcomers Club
Im a single mother to an 11month old! Its been the best experiance of my life :) His dad has never wanted to be around, and Ive never forced the issue, because if I'm a firm believer that parents should WANT to be around their kids, if not a negative vibe would be picked up on by the child...! ANYWAY I'm getting off topic!
Iv recently met a guy and things have been going great :) Odhran loves him, my paremts approve, and all my friends think he's amazing :) SO all has been good all around :)
My only concern is it things go belly up with this guy, and Odhran has goten attached to him, im worried about the effect it will have!
Am i being overly cautious and paranoid about getting burned again? Even though I am VERY happy with this guy, and he knows that I dont want a fling, and neither does he, I have my lil man to think about now aswell.
Shoul i just stop worrying about maybe and focus on the good and the here and now?
Do any other single moms feel like this when starting a new relationship?
Replies
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If your worried about that I wouldn't continue to have your child around him until you know things are more secure and you know where the relationship is going. -
You shouldn't have your child around a man, and getting attached to him (thus confused later), until you're secure in your relationship with him.
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Don't bring your child around him until you know things are going to work out. -
I would say it depends on your insecurities. Is this a sixth sense telling you to be cautious? If so, keep your son away. If you're just paranoid because of past relationships, then I say go for it. Attachment is normal and healthy... & so is loss. It's all part of life and if you constantly live out of fear of what ifs then nothing good will ever happen. -
Just limit the amount of interaction they have until you know where this relationship is headed.
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You've just recently met a guy and you have already brought him around your son?
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I felt like that when I started dating my SO, because his family is are friends of my family, and it would have been bad if we didnt work out. Then the fact that my daughter loves talking with him, and playing around with him, and telling him he is going to be her step daddy. I just kind of jumped into the relationship and luckily it has been well. I was scared at first because her father was a D-bag, so it shut me off to relationships at first, but when he and I started dating, I knew he was the one, and let my guard down. Good luck!
