Parents buying things for adult kids

[lillypie2]

I was just having a conversation this morning at work with a couple co workers and one of them was saying how there is a pair of boots she wants and she told her mom..I started laughing and was saying how there are times I'm like oh I really want this and my parents will buy it for me and be like oh it's your birthday present evening it is a few months early, or if they know there is something I really want but won't by it for myself because of the cost or something they will get it for me. It doesn't happen all the time but it does happen. I would do the same for my kids and if my parents ever needed anything I would be there to help any way I could,. Well another co worker that was sitting there told us that was sad and that we were mooching off our parents and that once your an adult you shouldn't get anything from your parents but should be there to give them whatever they need. He said he doesn't get birthday gifts nothing any time from his mom and was told at 13 when he needed new shoes that he better get a job then..to me that is sad. So it got me wondering how many of you have parents that will buy you things or do more of you have parents that say you are an adult I'm not buying anything for you.

[redneckmama2]

My MIL and FIL buy things for us all the time. This includes christmas and birthday gifts and even sometime random stuff they see that they think we will like. We do the same for them though too :) My parents would if they had the money but as it is they are barely making it so they dont really buy for anyone else. 

[TexaBamaBaby]

There were times things were so bad my parents had to help us buy food. We've done the same for others.
I love giving gifts when I can. That won't change when my kids are grown.

[JTE11]

My parents still buy me things, because they want to. I think there's a huge difference between pressuring your parents to buy you something you can't afford or don't want to spend the money for and having a two-way giving relationship with yoru parents. I get stuff for my parents and they get stuff for me. They will just show up with some groceries or something they saw in a store that they thought I'd like. The same goes for me. I'm always taking things over there. I think a parent who woudl tell a 13-year-old they are done spending on him are terrible parents because it's not just money they withheld, it's a relationship that a child deserves. I'm not saying that a relationship is based on buying things, I'm saying that if you care about each other and want to do little things to make their day then the occasional present will happen. I also do lots of other things for my parents like do their laundry and clean their house and they do other non-monetary things for me. We don't keep score, we just do those things because we're close. What a horrible parent to say 'I'm done taking care of you, now you have to take care of me."

[ali840]

I  have given much thought to this. My mother-in-law mentions every christmas how hard I am to buy for. I have started giving her a list which she says she really appreciates, but I feel awkward doing it. I want her to know that I appreciate everything she does for my kids, but I expect no gifts from her. I give her a list because I know she wants to get me things she knows I will like. I feel grateful for any gifts I get, but expect none.

[3xangel]

I don't like my parents to buy me stuff. I feel that it's my turn to take care of them and show them I appreciate everything they did for me. I want to spoil them.

[mhaney03]

my mom got me a ton of stuff for christmas.. some body scrub, one of those "easy feet" things AMAZING BTW!  a $50 amazon gift card...

when she asks what I want for bday/ christmas my answer is usually "a day off from the kids"

[italk2rox]

A parent will always be a parent. The roles aren't supposed to switch.

[FoodIsLife]

I have 7 siblings total and most have a spouse and at least one child. Our parents(s) only give us things usually for Birthdays (if theyre going to see us) or for Christmas. My step-mom tries to send random gifts to all her grandkids though out the year so they each feel special. I'm sure if I asked, they would help us out but we are adults and we can afford those on our own and just don't have the need. My grandmother, however, buys me clothes like I was going "Back to school shopping" everytime I go see her. Or she'll buy me makeup or whatever. She loves to buy me things, why deprive her of that joy ;-) As long as you aren't taking advantage, I don't see the problem.  

[sweetpea290]

My parents still do things for me. I never ask but they just know when things are a little tight and will help me out. They are my parents and I'm lucky to have such great parents. I am always there for them all they have to do is call. So if your parents want to.give you a gift or money so what they are your mom and dad and if they didn't want to do it they wouldn't. I think it's very sad that your co workers mom.said that to him when he was 13. He's was still a kid and it was her responsibility to buy them for him. Even when my kids get older I will do.all I.can to help them when they need it.

[AutymsMommy]

huh

Quoting sparklebug86:

well I mooch big time but her gifts come with major strings! She has purchased outdoor living room furniture, charm bracelete, power wheels mercedes SUV for the kids, cowboy boots, clothes for each season, paid our insurance once when hubby lost his job, crib, not to mention dinners, trips to sea world, ren fest etc :) I love my mommy very much but she also feels that it gives her the right to say whatever she wants and thats not fun :(