My 3 year old come home with band aids on his stomach. When I finaly convinced him to let me take them off he had two big red whelps under the band aids. When I asked him what happened he said "Ms. ** did it. She just did like this... as he motioned" When I asked him why and what happened he said that he was being bad. It looks as if maybe she grabbed him by the waist and dug her thumb nails into his stomach and drug them. There are two raised red marks on the sides of his stomach and they are swollen up about 1/2 in long. I was not notified and was not given a report. I am going to the director about it tomorrow. But.... What would you do? What would you say???
Okay, first I want to thank every one for their advice. Sorry I couldn't update sooner. Yesterday I went and spoke with the director. I told her my concerns and showed her the pictures and made sure she knew I was concerned and upset. Well turns out she was the one who put the band aids on him.... because the teacher told her that the red areas were ringworm. I told her she needed to go look at them again. They are on the same spot on both sides of his stomach, that would be highly unlikely. I then repeated the part about what my son had told me and his story behind it (how and why). Anyhow, I had her call and make a formal report. I was told I had to go see a doctor and have ring worm ruled out... We went to one of those little clinics and when I explained they turned me away and told me I would have to go to the ER. They do not and will not see suspected abuse cases. He did however, say that the red spots look like pinch marks because of the size and the broken capillaries. The ER doctor confirmed saying they are abrasions NOT ring worm. (They look NOTHING like a ring worm) .
Today DHS came and saw my son. I have yet to hear from them as it is Friday, I am hoping to hear something on Monday.
by Jynnifer292November 15, 2012 at 6:20 AM
This was a daycare. Was the teacher that did it still there when you picked him up? If she wasn't, maybe there was a report and nobody remembered to give it to you. I am not saying that it isn't anything to be concerned about, maybe it is, it just seems odd that she just wouldn't mention it when it was an obvious mark.
by cupcake_momNovember 15, 2012 at 6:28 AM
make sure you take pictures with you
by TheMrs407November 15, 2012 at 6:39 AM
I would go in and ask about it first thing. Maybe it was an accident in some way. Maybe she's an an awful person who shouldn't be working with kids. We don't really know, but you definitely need to find out. Most parents aren't notified until the end of the day about accidents, unless it's fairly major. It may have been something no one even knew about. It's under his clothes and unless they knew he got hurt (in whatever instance) and looked, they may not even know about it.
by malibucjNovember 15, 2012 at 6:54 AM
I work for Headstart. If I were you, I would take photos of them, and go to the teacher asking for an explanation. I would then go to the director and talk to them and show them the photos. IF she did for sure, that is not accepatable.
November 15, 2012 at 7:16 AM
Take pictures. Anything that lasts, and is noticeable enough for an adult to put a bandage on, should have been the FIRST thing they told you about at pick up. My daycare tells me if they think there might be a bruise later, or if there is any mark that lasts more than a few minutes I have to sign an incident report. Take the pictures, have a sit down with teacher and director. I would not consider this acceptable at all. I could see an accident, but there should still have been documentation, incident report, and you signing off on it before you went home. The lack of communication would be more concerning to me than the marks.
by Byrd15November 15, 2012 at 7:19 AM
I would be pissed!!!!! I worked in daycare and every single time a child even got a splinter, I filled out a report. Accidents do happen, but she should have notified you, whether she was reprimanding or moving the child. There should now be a "dress code" for her fingernails, they should not exceed a certain length... Fingernails can be dangerous!
by sarah.xoNovember 15, 2012 at 7:22 AM
taking pictures, reporting to the day care and if nothing is done take it to the police. I'm laid back but when someone put there hands on my children then watch out momma bear is coming for you.
If it was an accident on her part she should have sent him home with a letter letting you know what happened.
by jhsloveNovember 15, 2012 at 7:27 AM
Take pics, yes--and show to the director. If you don't get a satisfactory answer, I would take your son out of the day care.
It's not so much that he got the marks on his stomach; that's bad, but accidents happen, and especially when a child is doing something that could be a danger to himself or others, sometimes there's no choice but to physically restrain him. If the daycare worker has long fingernails, I could see her accidentally scratching him (although that would be a good reason not to have long nails as a day care worker).
But even if that's what happened, you should have been notified and given a report. It sounds like the day care teacher was worried she'd get in trouble and was hoping you wouldn't say anything, which sounds fishy to me.
Yesterday my 13-month-old got bitten at day care--it wasn't too bad and she just ended up with a small mark on her shoulder--but the day care immediately called me to explain what happened and I got a written incident report at the end of the day.