Bleacher-mom
Friends kids destroyed my house!
January 3 at 12:15 AM
How strict should I be when it comes to other kids playing with my kids toys and messing up their rooms? With one of my friends I used to babysit her kids, so they pretty much know what I expect when they come over to play, although they are more like family so I usually make them clean up their own messes after they have stayed the night. But I have some other friends that come over with their kids so our kids can play together. While they're here, I try to have a good hostess attitude so I just let them play and have fun while the other mom and I chitchat. But after they leave I get upset at how much of a mess they made. It will usually take me all of the next day to clean up my kids rooms. I know my kids are also partly to blame, but I know that at least 75% of the toys that get pulled out are from the other kids. So what should I do? Should I just expect to clean up after them when they leave or be stricter when they're here? Is that the way it should be, that when other kids come what ever mess they make is now our responsibility? When I take my kids to other friends house I usually make them clean up what ever mess they made. Is there some unwritten rule that I don't know about? Sorry this is so long, but I'm just unsure how to handle this.

Replies

  • frndlyfn
    January 3 at 12:40 AM

    I enforce that everyone helps clean up before they go.  I always have dd help clean up when she goes to friends houses as well.

  • ruby_jewel_04
    January 3 at 1:47 AM
    In my house I don't care if its the first time your over, or you're practically family. If you helped make the mess you will help clean it up. Its not fair to me to have to do it all.
  • Paperfishies
    January 3 at 1:48 AM
    Don't know what to tell you. In my house, guests are not expected to clean up. If my children have friends over, my children are very well aware that any mess made is 100% on them to clean up.
  • aetrom
    by aetrom
    January 3 at 4:10 AM
    I taught my children that they clean their rooms, unless it is a rare exception like a big party with lots of kids. And if they need help they need to get the kids to clean. It took a few times but now they are pretty good about it!
  • careyphotoo
    January 3 at 6:27 AM
    I actually had this happen not to long ago with a friend of mine and her son. My DS room was destroyed And I mean there was a toy overturned. It was getting late and they were talking about leaving well they didn't leave until my DS room was picked up and honestly I haven't invited her son back over for a play date since and not sure if I will. In my house if you helped make the mess you help clean it and if we go somewhere I expect my kids to help pick up if they helped make the mess.
  • smcclure2005
    January 3 at 7:16 AM

    I have a couple kids that do that as well and my husband does not like it but like I told him just because some parents do not raise their kids with respect for others or have their child help clean up when their kid helped to destroy it does not mean that my kids will be raised lazy or disrespectful. It is annoying as hell I know the only other option is to inform your friend that their child will help to clean up if they play and if they do not do so then they will not be permitted to play...period. I have done that too....needless to say that mom understood and she worked with me so it will also depend on your friend...and in my opinion always remember it is your house therefor it is your rules. What they allow in their home is their issue not yours so if they cannot follow your rules then they will not be in my home...Good Luck

  • Cindy18
    by Cindy18
    January 3 at 7:30 AM

    I think you are being too anal about it. Kids are going to play and pull toys out.

    Either deal with it and have your friends over or don't.

    BTW, pulling out toys and messing up a room is FAR from destroying your house (as your title says)

  • Fields456
    January 3 at 7:34 AM
    This is what I do too


    Quoting frndlyfn:

    I enforce that everyone helps clean up before they go.  I always have dd help clean up when she goes to friends houses as well.


  • Silvia1011
    January 3 at 7:40 AM
    We don't usually have her friends over.. But the ones that have come over help clean up. They all know better than to leave my daughters room a mess. When she goes to their house, I expect her to help clean up too.
  • saltlifemama
    January 3 at 8:16 AM

    My son has a friend like that. He and my son have to pick up what they get out. My son knows that if they don't clean up as they go he will get stuck doing it by himself later.