my 2 sks are not doin well in school as far as behavior... what do you guys use a reward and punishment system. the school uses the stop sign/clip system to track the behaviors throughout the day..but at home we are at a loss...
My ds school follows the green - red system. If he comes home with a yellow which= 2 warnings. I have him go to bed 15 min. early. He is under the understanding that if he ever gets a red which= 2 warnings plus 1 additional incident he will have have to stay in his room with no toys and will only be allowed outmatch dinner and homework time.
If ds stays in the green all week he gets to stay up on Friday night for 1 additional hour to watch a movie and he gets a special breakfast on Saturday. I.e. doughnuts.
If ds makes it 20 days on green he gets a new toys.
ss has blue/green/yellow/red... the past month hes stayed on yellow and red mostly... its driving me crazy...just not sitting still being a bully, talking out of turn.. hes only in kinder and still has to kget the rules down.. but hes been in for almost 3 months and was in preschool.
sd has been on red mostly(her class does 5 colors) in the past 7 weeks.... shes in first grade and we had bevior issues that sopped after christmas lasy tr, but that was the result in getting suspended.(i know a kinder getting suspended)
we started having them mark it on a calender so they can visually se their progress(lack of) and with each color comes good or bad things. ie money each good day to earn towards snack sales on fridays and new toys. they go to bed early on bad days, with no toys but nothing is sinking in..
Honestly, I'd stop the physical rewards... "Wow, great job!" for days they did good, and for days they did poorly "Wow man, that really stinks! I know if it were me I wouldn't want that mark!" I say that because then they ONLY work for the incentive, and that incentive will only work for a period of time. Are you going to keep paying them all the way through school? That will be their expectation, KWIM? Plus, it gives THEM the opportunity to "fix it" rather than you trying to force them to.
We don't punish at home for minor things like talking or not following directions. that is the teachers job to keep that under control. Of course we talk to them about it but we don't punish.
When they act out physically, then they are grounded for the following day. If it happens more than once, its a weeks worth of grounding. We also make them write apology letters, sentences and then a turn around paragraph of how THEY would feel if someone was treating them that way.
well the oldest is lying about the true events of the day(to her teacher) stealing school supplies, signing my name on school papers (shes 6)because she doesnt want to get in trouble. not doing school work goofing off in class....
my youngest is 5 and is only in kinder..but hes being a bully..hes one of the smallest kids and is pushing and hitting. hes talking out of turn, goofing off in class to get a reaction fro mhis friends.. being disruptive (i know its kinder and its designed to teach him the rules but still)