How did you handle the first anniversary of your parents passing. I can't visit his grave cause I live in NC, and his grave is in NJ. So what did you do, how did you handle it?
My mom will have been gone for 12 years on Dec 10. The first year I just kept myself busy and surrounded by family and friends. It was hard, but I was not married and did not have kids. I think the hardest year was after I had my 1st and we spent Christmas with my grandparents in the house my mom died in. I have only visited her grave a couple times, but we have driven past it several times. She is buried in AR and we are now in TX. It has gotten easier each year and I think I am finally ready to take my kids to her grave this year when we go up for Christmas.
by AnonymousOctober 12, 2013 at 4:06 PMMy Dad's was the hardest because I was only 23 when he died and it was so shocking. I didn't live in the same state. It was actually the beginning of not mourning anymore. After a year things got easier. He passed away over 28 years ago.
My mom was older and sick for a while so her passing didn't effect me like my Dad's did. It was a blessing for her not to suffer anymore. She passed away in 2007.
Also my stepdad passed away too in 2000.
Always remember the good times and don't dwell on death. Celebrate his life.
October 12, 2013 at 4:38 PM
I was 17 when my father passed away. I really didn't feel any loss, mostly because he was never around when I was growing up. We would see him about once a year. 21 years later I still don't feel any loss.
by AnonymousOctober 12, 2013 at 5:52 PMWhat’s a parnet?
by AnonymousOctober 12, 2013 at 7:26 PMParent. Did you read the post??
What’s a parnet?
by AnonymousOctober 12, 2013 at 10:02 PM
moms who have lost parents.
My mom died in 1988, my dad in 1998 . There are still times when I wish I could talk with them. But you get past it. I don't visit graves. That helps. I have always thought that graves and cemeteries are too dark and negative, makes the loss worse.
I lost my dad a week after having my youngest. I'm still not over it or it's not any easier. It's been almost 5 years & I go put flowers on his grave for his bday, father's day, & Christmas. One thing that helped a little after it happened was I bought a Christmas ornament/sun catcher in memory of him. I also bought a personalized photo frame as well& a tear drop item as well. It's still hard for me to look at his picture but it's getting better. Talking about him though is still emotional for me, too raw.
by ZsMommyOctober 13, 2013 at 1:13 AM
My father passed when I was 5 mo's pregnant. I was there by his bedside when he passed.
How did I handle it? Same as I do every year-it just becomes easier with passing year (it's over 13 years now...oh-and I'm in NC and my father is buried in PA,so I understand the distance-though we were in PA for the first 8 years of his passing-so I admit that made it easier)
I light a candle,say a prayer,I used to have a big cry out moment,now I just smile and think of the good memories.
It will get easier in time.
I was seven when my father died. I dedicate a mass every year on his birthday and the anniversary of his death or whenever really. My oldest is the age I was when I lost him and I have much more compassion for myself. It feels good to be able to acknowledge and grieve the loss. When I was a child, we just didn't talk about it--keep a stiff upper lip kind of thing. I tell stories to my girls about him and let them know what I think he'd like about their personalities. And always remember to be so grateful for the time you had with him (or her).