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School Tells Bullied Sixth Grader to Get a Breast Reduction
January 19, 2013 at 1:27 PM

School Tells Bullied Sixth Grader to Get a Breast Reduction

Posted by Jeanne Sager
on January 18, 2013 at 4:20 PM

boobies braceletIn every grade school class there is that one girl who develops way ahead of the pack. She's the envy of some, the nightmare of others, and an easy target for bullies. And for one sixth grade girl in Missouri, the bullying got really out of control when it started coming from her school administrators who told the 13-year-old to get a breast reduction!

Well, the school got one thing right -- something needs to be done about the boobs. And by that I mean the administrators who would dare tell a child that their body is the problem.

What's next? Telling the overweight girl that she needs to take up an eating disorder so people will leave her alone? Or maybe the schools will start requiring plastic surgery for the kid with the port wine stain?

Or, you know, we could just tell the bullies where to shove it.

Sigh. I wish I could re-write this story for this poor girl, that school administrators would have done their jobs and told the kids picking on her breasts to grow up.

But for some reason this "blame the victim" mentality seems to be entrenched in schools all across this country. It's not just the boobs in the Riverview Gardens School District. A mom recently related that her son was being called a gay slur by his classmates. The school's response? They told her to cut her son's hair.

This is just what the bullies want -- they want to make life harder for their victims, and when districts turn on the kids who are being wronged, they're playing right into their hands. This poor girl is simply growing. She can't help that. But in telling her to get a breast reduction, the school is trying to make science and nature the bad guy here instead of the kids who need to learn some compassion.

Is it any wonder kids are bullies? We still have adults who work with kids and who find it acceptable to treat kids as if their naturally developing bodies are a problem. Until the adults change, this is not going to stop!

Have you dealt with a "blame the victim" issue in your district? What happened?

Replies

  • charity62
    January 19, 2013 at 2:30 PM

    that is so messed up to blame the victim    no wonder victims don't want to come forward any more

  • sucker4myloves
    January 19, 2013 at 2:31 PM

    Mom and Dad need to make life a living hell for whoever made that comment and whoever is allowing the bullying to continue, and they need to teach the girl to fight. Or get her lessons if they can't. Bet you if she knocked someone out it would stop. Don't give me that "violence isn't the answer" crap--kids are harrassing her about her breasts, sometimes a bully needs a good old fashioned ass whoppin to learn a lesson.

  • Paperfishies
    January 19, 2013 at 2:32 PM
    Using that logic I guess we can tell the kids who are teasing her to have their tongues removed, so they can't run their mouths.
  • ForeverInLove
    January 19, 2013 at 2:33 PM

    As someone who was an early bloomer, and kept blooming the whole time I was in school... this is...disgusting. Who, in their right mind, would tell a CHILD to get a breast reduction?! It's not their place! Their place to is teach compassion to the other children, and to teach the other children to be respectful of EVERYONE. 

    It's pretty sad when my son's developmental kindergarten class teaches that everyone is different physically, but they are still all the same. 

  • hollyandjason
    January 19, 2013 at 2:34 PM
    This!
    I was thy girl who was always the biggest, but times have changed I was never bullied because of it!


    Quoting LyTe684:

    Someone would be missing teeth.
  • Sekirei
    by Sekirei
    January 19, 2013 at 2:37 PM

    Those administrators would fear me by the time I got done. That is a disgusting thing to say about a 13 yr old. 

  • confused0701
    January 19, 2013 at 2:41 PM

    It doesn't matter what context it was used in!  It shouldn't have been used PERIOD!  

    Quoting Threes.Company:

     It is absolutely inappropriate.  I do think there is a difference between an administrator telling a child, "Well, if you want the bullying to stop, get a breast reduction." and maybe a situation where the student is complaining about their chest and says they don't like their body and they don't want to go through this their whole life, I don't want a big chest (blah, blah, blah) and an administrator says, "Well, you could look into breast reduction later on if you feel that way, but for now... blah blah blah".  I can see something like that EASILY being turned into "Mrs. So-and-So said to get a breast reduction."  You know what I mean?  I would just really be interested to hear the other side of the story and the context of the comment.  It could have been totally not meant as a solution to the bullying at all.  There ARE bad administrators out there, and maybe this person DID make a horrible inappropriate comment.  I've just taught enough 8th grade girls to know better than to just accept their word flat-out.  I am not calling this girl a liar.  Not at all.  I don't even know her.  I am just saying, it would be helpful to hear from the administrator and  to know what the exact conversation was.  Know what I mean?  Either way, the suggestion is inappropriate and not a solution to bullying issues.


    Quoting Cafe Amanda:


    Quoting Threes.Company:

    Where's the rest of the story about the breast reduction comment?  I find it odd that an administrator would say such a thing.  I've worked in 4 different schools.  I have never met an administrator who would say such a thing.  I am wondering what the context was of the comment, if it was made at all.  This post leaves a lot of details out.  Obviously I don't think the child should be told to get surgery to fix a bullying issue.  No one does!  Which is why I am wondering what really happened.  Even the article (link) said the school district was "looking into it".  So, we don't really know what happened yet.

    From what I gathered from the video in the news link, it sounds like maybe it was an offhanded comment (perhaps even sincerely trying to be helpful?) by whoever took the call. Regardless of who said it or why, it is absolutely an inappropriate suggestion for the situation, IMO.




  • AM-BRAT
    by AM-BRAT
    January 19, 2013 at 2:47 PM
    Still though it could have started when the student said, 'I wish I could have them reduced' to which an admin agreed. WE DON'T KNOW AND KIDS ARE NOT ALWAYS 'PERFECT' WITH THE TRUTH.

    Remember the star face tattoo chick? If the parent were there and admin said 'she should get a reduction' that's one thing. Everything else is grey matter to me...


    Quoting Cafe Amanda:


    Quoting Threes.Company:

    Where's the rest of the story about the breast reduction comment?  I find it odd that an administrator would say such a thing.  I've worked in 4 different schools.  I have never met an administrator who would say such a thing.  I am wondering what the context was of the comment, if it was made at all.  This post leaves a lot of details out.  Obviously I don't think the child should be told to get surgery to fix a bullying issue.  No one does!  Which is why I am wondering what really happened.  Even the article (link) said the school district was "looking into it".  So, we don't really know what happened yet.

    From what I gathered from the video in the news link, it sounds like maybe it was an offhanded comment (perhaps even sincerely trying to be helpful?) by whoever took the call. Regardless of who said it or why, it is absolutely an inappropriate suggestion for the situation, IMO.


  • Threes.Company
    January 19, 2013 at 2:47 PM

     I am pretty sure I said that.


    Quoting confused0701:

    It doesn't matter what context it was used in!  It shouldn't have been used PERIOD!  

    Quoting Threes.Company:

     It is absolutely inappropriate.  I do think there is a difference between an administrator telling a child, "Well, if you want the bullying to stop, get a breast reduction." and maybe a situation where the student is complaining about their chest and says they don't like their body and they don't want to go through this their whole life, I don't want a big chest (blah, blah, blah) and an administrator says, "Well, you could look into breast reduction later on if you feel that way, but for now... blah blah blah".  I can see something like that EASILY being turned into "Mrs. So-and-So said to get a breast reduction."  You know what I mean?  I would just really be interested to hear the other side of the story and the context of the comment.  It could have been totally not meant as a solution to the bullying at all.  There ARE bad administrators out there, and maybe this person DID make a horrible inappropriate comment.  I've just taught enough 8th grade girls to know better than to just accept their word flat-out.  I am not calling this girl a liar.  Not at all.  I don't even know her.  I am just saying, it would be helpful to hear from the administrator and  to know what the exact conversation was.  Know what I mean?  Either way, the suggestion is inappropriate and not a solution to bullying issues.

     

    Quoting Cafe Amanda:


    Quoting Threes.Company:

    Where's the rest of the story about the breast reduction comment?  I find it odd that an administrator would say such a thing.  I've worked in 4 different schools.  I have never met an administrator who would say such a thing.  I am wondering what the context was of the comment, if it was made at all.  This post leaves a lot of details out.  Obviously I don't think the child should be told to get surgery to fix a bullying issue.  No one does!  Which is why I am wondering what really happened.  Even the article (link) said the school district was "looking into it".  So, we don't really know what happened yet.

    From what I gathered from the video in the news link, it sounds like maybe it was an offhanded comment (perhaps even sincerely trying to be helpful?) by whoever took the call. Regardless of who said it or why, it is absolutely an inappropriate suggestion for the situation, IMO.

     

     



     

  • Anonymous 4
    by Anonymous 4
    January 19, 2013 at 2:56 PM

    I haven't dealt with it with my child. Where I grew up it was a small town and 3/4 of the school was mormon. When I started getting picked on for my religion, my mother marched her ass into the school demanding that it be taken care of. Since the bullies were the mormons,  and the administration all went to the LDS church, their response was "Well, have you ever thought of converting to LDS. It would be easier for her to fit in with the other kids. She'd make some friends this way." MY MOTHER WAS PISSED!

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