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MonicaV1982
SIL Good New/Bad News (Edit)
January 26, 2013 at 4:23 AM

SIL had a c-section (said her 36 week exam hurt too much and she was too swollen to birth normally) two days ago. Because of the c-section baby boy had fluid in his lungs and they kept him on oxygen in an incubator for over 12 hours. They also gave formula because of "low blood sugar." Good news is that the first feeding apparently went well. Last time I talked to her she said that she planned on only BF until 6 weeks. I hope it works out for her. It saddens me that she has so much faith in the medical system that she doesn't even ask if she has any other options or question what they're doing. I know, perhaps those interventions were necessary and I am wrong, but I still wonder. It also sucks knowing that she could have pumped for him. The nurses are supposed to be IBCLC's, so I would expect that they would have brought that up to her. Well, at least I know what hospital I won't be having my next baby at if I am in Wa state at that time, or at least going in with a birth plan. I also don't have all the information, so this is only based on what I have found out on FB and from family in text messages. Sadly in my family it's pushed that medical professionals know everything and I know that if I corrected any piece of information (like formula is needed for low blood sugar) I will be met with "well you're not the doctor!" I'm doing my best not to say anything. My SIL and brother are also worried about his temperature regulation being out of the incubator (he was 7lbs 11oz). I wish someone would tell them about how skin to skin helps with this!

Added: This is the type of situation where I wish people didn't just blindly accept stuff, but questioned their care. I'm not looking for women to make the decisions that I want them to make, but rather to be more involved in their care rathe than be passive and trusting what the doctors say implicitly.


ETA: I have a question can babies be held if they're on a nasal cannula? Anyone know? I'm not looking to start an argument or anything with my SIL (don't even plan to bring it up unless she asks which I doubt), but I am curious.


ETA2: BABY was NOT a preemie and was taken out of the isolette after 12 hours.



Replies

  • ckroch
    by ckroch
    January 26, 2013 at 6:05 AM
    36 week is still preemie- kiky would have needed oxygen support wether c section or vaginal.

    If baby has nasal cannula might be able to be held- but likely other factors such as maintaining temps would prevent that.
  • Graykitty92
    January 26, 2013 at 7:07 AM
    They can be held. My son had to have one in his nose for a day after he was born. Also I pumped for him to have my breastmilk and I found out a nurse have him formula. She days she couldn't find any of my milk to give him. The next nurse on duty checked the freezer and there was plenty!! I was furious!
  • Graykitty92
    January 26, 2013 at 7:09 AM
    Oh and my son was on a warming table and they let me kangaroo cuddle with him. My body heat help keep him warm
  • AKmom11
    by AKmom11
    January 26, 2013 at 8:08 AM
    With this every situation is different. And going through it as a mom is the single most difficult thing ever. My baby was born at 34 weeks. I am a FTM and wasn't able to produce right away. My baby was able to get donor milk through the hospital but they only offer it to preemies under 36 weeks. Once she hit 36 weeks it would have been formula and she had a few feedings of partial formula because I wasn't producing enough. It wasn't what I wanted but we had no choice. Luckily it didn't last long. They are going through a lot I am sure. And lots of information thrown at them fast. Many decisions to make. It might not be that they are misinformed but need help and support during this time so they go with what they think is best from the resources and info they have. Not saying anyone is right or wrong in this situation. Just saying I do understand. My SIL made me feel awful about myself as a mother because I bottle fed my preemie breastmilk. No formula at all once we got home. But we were working on the latch thing and she needed to get her weight up. We had a plan to drop every other bottle feeding til they were all from breast. She didn't understand. Fought me. Talked about me. Told me i was wrong. Misinformed. That my baby needed to eat from the breast only. My baby is 6 months old and exclusively breast fed. Still takes bottles of BM while I'm at work since I work fulltime and we are still going strong. That's longer than my SIL made it with any if her 3 kids. And she didn't work at all with her babies. Every situation is different. They will figure it out. But right now, they need support.
  • melindabelcher
    mel
    January 26, 2013 at 8:14 AM
    you knew she was like this before baby.
    Unfortunately some just "know" everything. Or think drs are gods.
    Hopefully little guy gets to go home soon.
  • MamaToCollin
    January 26, 2013 at 9:07 AM

    Yes, you can hold a baby with nasal cannula O2.


  • audmom1218
    January 26, 2013 at 9:18 AM
    Sigh, I understand your internal conflict. My BFF had hers 6 wk early. She was reporting everything that was going on, stats etc and I was providing her with info on why she didn't need to supplement etc. she was afraid with such an itty bitty and battling ppd and not having her natural birth (they had to induce with pitocin because her water broke, then she asked for an epidural). But since then (her dd is now 5mo) she thanked me for providing her with the facts and wishes she had trusted her gut to go against the doctors. It felt good to know that although I felt "meddling" at the time she appreciated the info and in hindsight recognized what was going on.
  • MommyO2-6631
    January 26, 2013 at 9:54 AM
    Yes. I held my preemie with his canula but they wouldn't let me while he was on cpap
  • MonicaV1982
    January 26, 2013 at 3:27 PM

    The baby wasn't a preemie for one and also my issue is not that she allowed formula, but that she never even questioned if it was really needed. And just for the record I had to give formula in the beginning too.


    Quoting AKmom11:

    With this every situation is different. And going through it as a mom is the single most difficult thing ever. My baby was born at 34 weeks. I am a FTM and wasn't able to produce right away. My baby was able to get donor milk through the hospital but they only offer it to preemies under 36 weeks. Once she hit 36 weeks it would have been formula and she had a few feedings of partial formula because I wasn't producing enough. It wasn't what I wanted but we had no choice. Luckily it didn't last long. They are going through a lot I am sure. And lots of information thrown at them fast. Many decisions to make. It might not be that they are misinformed but need help and support during this time so they go with what they think is best from the resources and info they have. Not saying anyone is right or wrong in this situation. Just saying I do understand. My SIL made me feel awful about myself as a mother because I bottle fed my preemie breastmilk. No formula at all once we got home. But we were working on the latch thing and she needed to get her weight up. We had a plan to drop every other bottle feeding til they were all from breast. She didn't understand. Fought me. Talked about me. Told me i was wrong. Misinformed. That my baby needed to eat from the breast only. My baby is 6 months old and exclusively breast fed. Still takes bottles of BM while I'm at work since I work fulltime and we are still going strong. That's longer than my SIL made it with any if her 3 kids. And she didn't work at all with her babies. Every situation is different. They will figure it out. But right now, they need support.



  • MonicaV1982
    January 26, 2013 at 3:28 PM


    Baby wasn't 36 weeks. Baby was a planned c-section at 39 weeks. My post said the "36 week exam." She decided on a c-section because she was told she was "too swollen" and decided there was no way she could give birth, so she scheduled the section. Baby was 7lbs 11oz and the only side effect was the fluid in the lungs. I was only asking because from what I understand skin to skin keeps babies temps more regulated than a warmer. I just wanted to find out if the nasal cannula stops  people from holding their babies.

    Quoting ckroch:

    36 week is still preemie- kiky would have needed oxygen support wether c section or vaginal.

    If baby has nasal cannula might be able to be held- but likely other factors such as maintaining temps would prevent that.



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