African American Mommies

Dana267
I mean really---what do you expect? No bashing BUT DAMN!
by Dana267
January 2, 2013 at 11:30 AM

At a brithday party the mothers were all sitting talking and just laughing about how much time we spend taking our children from here to there and supporting them in the things that they do. One mother chimed in and said she's not able to do such things because she has 5 children abd she is a single parent. "I'm by myself. I'm doing it all- I'm both Mom and a Dad."

The way she said it seemed like a combo between a defense mechanism and  maybe in a way to get recognition. It was kinda an awkward thing. To make matters worse one of the women in the circle talking was actually grandmother and she said straight out "None of the fathers help out? Not-a one?"

She said, "Nope. I'm all by myself." One of the moms said "Wow you're super mom."

The grandmother kinda rolled her eyes.

Can you be a super mom when you have 4 baby daddies and none of them stayed? Your children are not being able to do the activities they want to do (some that are free) because you are overwhelmed.

I was kinda irked because I'm thinking the 9 month old is brand new and that dude didn't stay around.


I got really upset because her daughter--who is the only child who attends our school will be taken out after this year. She decided that it was too much trouble to take her to another school. Her daughter atends the Gifted Center School with my daughter and she is brilliant but because her other children aren't gifted she is just going to put her in the neighborhood school which is failing. She said unless her father wants to pick her up and drive her himself she'll go with the rest of the children.

That pissed me off. Why should her child suffer because of the parents? You sat up there and had 5 children???? 




The children were from 2nd grade to 9 months.

Replies

  • sexychica25
    January 2, 2013 at 5:59 PM
    Just wow.
  • PurplWildFlower
    January 2, 2013 at 6:28 PM
    It's appears that she has her plate full - 5 children w/ 4 different fathers is a lot. But I still think she is superwoman.

    I have two children and they both are very active and I have a husband. And some days I wonder how I just accomplished that list of the things to-do.

    I am believer that people do the best then can do. And if her children are loved, fed and clothed while she maintains her household and keeps a moderate level of decency....she is a superwoman.
  • Hottmomma607
    January 2, 2013 at 6:36 PM

    eye rolling

  • Tish_Hughes
    January 2, 2013 at 6:36 PM

     Truth be told, I made a mistake ONCE. Not calling my child a mistake but her dad is....even though we are friendly. However, I learned my lesson. I don't need to go and do the same thing 3 and 4 more times to get that having kids with just anybody isn't smart. She's not "supermom", she's "stupidmom".

  • Pooobaihr
    January 2, 2013 at 6:41 PM

    Not gonna judge her cause I'm not in her situation.  But I can see her point of view when it comes to her daughter.  My youngest is going to another school because the one hw as going to didn't have a TAP class for his age group.  So now he has to go all the way on the other side of town because the district won't put any classes in the THREE schools that are near my home.

    That is just too much.  I don't have a car so I can't get all the way on that side of town to take him to any of the things they ever have going on. Much of the time they have carnivals and programs that I wish I could take him to but I can't.  The bus in my area doesn't travel over here past 7:30PM so unless one of those teachers at the school felt like giving me and my 3boys a ride home, those activities won't be things my kid gets to enjoy.    I mean, sorry, I wish I could, but its just not the stars for him right now.

    Maybe thats how she sees it.

  • RoyalBlossom
    January 2, 2013 at 6:52 PM

     I hate when people see their kids as burdens, she either loves to easy or is extremely reckless. My little cousin had the chance to be skipped a grade and moved to a gifted school, but her mom didn't do the paper works so now she is in a regular public school. She was offered this in elementary now she is in high school. It is sucky, that parents are so selfish.

  • SunFlower700
    January 2, 2013 at 7:21 PM

    I think it's pretty selfish of the mother.  I don't care if she has 20 kids.  As a parent, you would think that you would want better for your kids.  A good opportunity can lead to better opportunities, and majority of parents would want their child to grow and be more successful in life than they were.  Yes, it's probably an inconvenience to drive one child to one school while driving the rest to another.  When you choose to be a parent, you make sacrafices when it comes to your children.  Even if it means inconveniencing yourself.

  • Dana267
    by Dana267
    January 2, 2013 at 7:23 PM
    Yours seems more like a logistics problem vs an I'm overwhelmed with all these kids by myself problem.


    Quoting Pooobaihr:

    Not gonna judge her cause I'm not in her situation.  But I can see her point of view when it comes to her daughter.  My youngest is going to another school because the one hw as going to didn't have a TAP class for his age group.  So now he has to go all the way on the other side of town because the district won't put any classes in the THREE schools that are near my home.

    That is just too much.  I don't have a car so I can't get all the way on that side of town to take him to any of the things they ever have going on. Much of the time they have carnivals and programs that I wish I could take him to but I can't.  The bus in my area doesn't travel over here past 7:30PM so unless one of those teachers at the school felt like giving me and my 3boys a ride home, those activities won't be things my kid gets to enjoy.    I mean, sorry, I wish I could, but its just not the stars for him right now.

    Maybe thats how she sees it.


  • rayroe2
    by rayroe2
    January 2, 2013 at 7:24 PM

    That is just crazy, when I hear stories like that. Makes me just think she should of found someone to adopt her kids, so they can have better futures because she clearly has no gaols, If she done opened her legs to 5 different man.

  • Pooobaihr
    January 2, 2013 at 7:31 PM

    Yeah.  If her issue really is the fact that she feels overwhelmed, then she just needs to suck it up and deal.  She has five kids, by now she should know how to handle everything they need.  But again, I don't know her situation. Does suck for the kids though.

    Quoting Dana267:

    Yours seems more like a logistics problem vs an I'm overwhelmed with all these kids by myself problem.


    Quoting Pooobaihr:

    Not gonna judge her cause I'm not in her situation.  But I can see her point of view when it comes to her daughter.  My youngest is going to another school because the one hw as going to didn't have a TAP class for his age group.  So now he has to go all the way on the other side of town because the district won't put any classes in the THREE schools that are near my home.

    That is just too much.  I don't have a car so I can't get all the way on that side of town to take him to any of the things they ever have going on. Much of the time they have carnivals and programs that I wish I could take him to but I can't.  The bus in my area doesn't travel over here past 7:30PM so unless one of those teachers at the school felt like giving me and my 3boys a ride home, those activities won't be things my kid gets to enjoy.    I mean, sorry, I wish I could, but its just not the stars for him right now.

    Maybe thats how she sees it.



African American Mommies

Active Posts in All Groups
More Active Posts
Featured Posts in All Groups
More Featured Posts