Natural Birth & Parenting

melindabelcher
Is it unfair?
November 10, 2012 at 4:22 PM
We visit my parents once a weekish and see them at church 1-2 times a week.
My mom always puts ellie down so she'll crawl. shes close, rocks back and forth and moves her arms forward but cant figure out her legs yet.
I don't want her to crawl! Where we are/will be staying theres no where to crawl and not ok for her to be on the floor. I explained to them that once she knows she can be independent she'll want to be. Or at least thats how my older 2 were.
Am I wrong, should I encourage her? Am I really harming her?
Shes also developed the pincer grasp this week but I haven't offered solids because with housing placement undetermined I thought I would/should delay a little longer until we're more stable.
Im being made to feel like a jerk :(
Shes 7.5mo what should I do

Replies

  • snowangel1979
    November 11, 2012 at 12:00 PM
    I'm not bashing or anything but WHY?
    Why would you stay somewhere covered in dog feces and pee? Just breathing that can't be good for your health. Could you maybe stay at your parents house instead.


    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Because where we are staying the floors are constantly covered in dog urine/feces and theres 3 child hating chihuahuas.

    The solids is cause I was concerned she would come to expect them. This is my first bls the other ones were spoon/jar fed and knew it was time to eat. Not sure how long we'll be in a shelter and how often nutritous/baby appropiate solids will be available.

    Idk.




    Quoting notjstanothrmom:

    I wouldn't stop her from crawling. I understand not wanting her to but why limit her growth?

    As for the solids, that I agree with. Maybe not for those reasons (how would not being in a stable house effect her eating habits?) but that is a completely acceptable age to be breastfed only.



  • melindabelcher
    November 11, 2012 at 12:27 PM
    Believe me if we didn't have to we wouldn't.
    My father is a crack addict and my mother chose to let us move out rather then ask him to stay elsewhere.
    We are trying to find a cheaper vehicle so we can get into a family shelter. Our current vehicle is valued 9000-ish but we owe 13000ish. We can't have any assets valued greater then 5000.
    My mother in law is the lesser of the evils available at this time :(
    I'm hoping to surrender our car today and tommorow in the er there will be a social worker available to help us.
    I know your not bashing :) I would think the same thing and would have never imagined we would ever be in this situation.


    Quoting snowangel1979:

    I'm not bashing or anything but WHY?

    Why would you stay somewhere covered in dog feces and pee? Just breathing that can't be good for your health. Could you maybe stay at your parents house instead.




    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Because where we are staying the floors are constantly covered in dog urine/feces and theres 3 child hating chihuahuas.


    The solids is cause I was concerned she would come to expect them. This is my first bls the other ones were spoon/jar fed and knew it was time to eat. Not sure how long we'll be in a shelter and how often nutritous/baby appropiate solids will be available.


    Idk.






    Quoting notjstanothrmom:

    I wouldn't stop her from crawling. I understand not wanting her to but why limit her growth?

    As for the solids, that I agree with. Maybe not for those reasons (how would not being in a stable house effect her eating habits?) but that is a completely acceptable age to be breastfed only.




  • melindabelcher
    November 11, 2012 at 12:30 PM
    See previous reply :)


    Quoting ashuiren:

    Is there a reason you don't spend more time at your parents' house? I don't think you're harming her by not letting her crawl, but if there's more room at your parents' and the situation where you're living is as toxic as it sounds, I think I'd spend as much time away from there as possible.

    My older son didn't start crawling until 9 months, and my younger son is almost 9 months and is just starting to eat solids 2-3 times a day regularly. We started solids with him at 6 months, but treated it more like a treat until he really started eating enough of what we gave him to feel like he was ready for it regularly. So from my experience at least, I don't think your lo will be hurt by delaying things a bit.


  • LittleBirdFly
    November 11, 2012 at 12:32 PM

    why dont you want her to crawl? I understand not wanting her to crawl at chuch or in any puplic place because the floors arent clean. But at home? Yes she should be crawling or at leats trying to by now. Most kids walk when they a year old.

  • sreichelt26
    November 11, 2012 at 12:36 PM

    I agree with this. 

    Quoting larissalarie:

    There's nothing at all wrong with delaying solids, they don't need them the instant they are ready.

    I'm a little more torn about the crawling thing. No you aren't harming her, I mean sure everything evens out eventually, but I'm not sure you should discourage her from reaching a milestone she's ready for just because it's a bad time for it.


  • snowangel1979
    November 11, 2012 at 1:01 PM
    Ohh my. I think I would take dog messes over a crack addict too.

    I hope the social worker can help. I feel so bad for you right now. Big hugs hopefully it will all work out in the end.


    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Believe me if we didn't have to we wouldn't.

    My father is a crack addict and my mother chose to let us move out rather then ask him to stay elsewhere.

    We are trying to find a cheaper vehicle so we can get into a family shelter. Our current vehicle is valued 9000-ish but we owe 13000ish. We can't have any assets valued greater then 5000.

    My mother in law is the lesser of the evils available at this time :(

    I'm hoping to surrender our car today and tommorow in the er there will be a social worker available to help us.

    I know your not bashing :) I would think the same thing and would have never imagined we would ever be in this situation.




    Quoting snowangel1979:

    I'm not bashing or anything but WHY?


    Why would you stay somewhere covered in dog feces and pee? Just breathing that can't be good for your health. Could you maybe stay at your parents house instead.






    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Because where we are staying the floors are constantly covered in dog urine/feces and theres 3 child hating chihuahuas.



    The solids is cause I was concerned she would come to expect them. This is my first bls the other ones were spoon/jar fed and knew it was time to eat. Not sure how long we'll be in a shelter and how often nutritous/baby appropiate solids will be available.



    Idk.








    Quoting notjstanothrmom:

    I wouldn't stop her from crawling. I understand not wanting her to but why limit her growth?

    As for the solids, that I agree with. Maybe not for those reasons (how would not being in a stable house effect her eating habits?) but that is a completely acceptable age to be breastfed only.





  • melindabelcher
    November 11, 2012 at 2:18 PM
    I'm guessing you haven't read the replies......public floors are cleaner then our current location.


    Quoting LittleBirdFly:

    why dont you want her to crawl? I understand not wanting her to crawl at chuch or in any puplic place because the floors arent clean. But at home? Yes she should be crawling or at leats trying to by now. Most kids walk when they a year old.


  • LittleBirdFly
    November 11, 2012 at 2:22 PM

    so you living with with who now? Because you said :my mother choses to let us move out"

    whos dogs are thoese? If the poop and pee on the floor I would kick the dogs out! The health of you and especially of the baby has priority!

    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Believe me if we didn't have to we wouldn't.
    My father is a crack addict and my mother chose to let us move out rather then ask him to stay elsewhere.
    We are trying to find a cheaper vehicle so we can get into a family shelter. Our current vehicle is valued 9000-ish but we owe 13000ish. We can't have any assets valued greater then 5000.
    My mother in law is the lesser of the evils available at this time :(
    I'm hoping to surrender our car today and tommorow in the er there will be a social worker available to help us.
    I know your not bashing :) I would think the same thing and would have never imagined we would ever be in this situation.


    Quoting snowangel1979:

    I'm not bashing or anything but WHY?

    Why would you stay somewhere covered in dog feces and pee? Just breathing that can't be good for your health. Could you maybe stay at your parents house instead.




    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Because where we are staying the floors are constantly covered in dog urine/feces and theres 3 child hating chihuahuas.


    The solids is cause I was concerned she would come to expect them. This is my first bls the other ones were spoon/jar fed and knew it was time to eat. Not sure how long we'll be in a shelter and how often nutritous/baby appropiate solids will be available.


    Idk.






    Quoting notjstanothrmom:

    I wouldn't stop her from crawling. I understand not wanting her to but why limit her growth?

    As for the solids, that I agree with. Maybe not for those reasons (how would not being in a stable house effect her eating habits?) but that is a completely acceptable age to be breastfed only.





  • melindabelcher
    November 11, 2012 at 2:36 PM
    We live with my mil. They are her dogs


    Quoting LittleBirdFly:

    so you living with with who now? Because you said :my mother choses to let us move out"

    whos dogs are thoese? If the poop and pee on the floor I would kick the dogs out! The health of you and especially of the baby has priority!


    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Believe me if we didn't have to we wouldn't.

    My father is a crack addict and my mother chose to let us move out rather then ask him to stay elsewhere.

    We are trying to find a cheaper vehicle so we can get into a family shelter. Our current vehicle is valued 9000-ish but we owe 13000ish. We can't have any assets valued greater then 5000.

    My mother in law is the lesser of the evils available at this time :(

    I'm hoping to surrender our car today and tommorow in the er there will be a social worker available to help us.

    I know your not bashing :) I would think the same thing and would have never imagined we would ever be in this situation.





    Quoting snowangel1979:

    I'm not bashing or anything but WHY?


    Why would you stay somewhere covered in dog feces and pee? Just breathing that can't be good for your health. Could you maybe stay at your parents house instead.







    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Because where we are staying the floors are constantly covered in dog urine/feces and theres 3 child hating chihuahuas.



    The solids is cause I was concerned she would come to expect them. This is my first bls the other ones were spoon/jar fed and knew it was time to eat. Not sure how long we'll be in a shelter and how often nutritous/baby appropiate solids will be available.



    Idk.









    Quoting notjstanothrmom:

    I wouldn't stop her from crawling. I understand not wanting her to but why limit her growth?

    As for the solids, that I agree with. Maybe not for those reasons (how would not being in a stable house effect her eating habits?) but that is a completely acceptable age to be breastfed only.









  • LittleBirdFly
    November 11, 2012 at 2:40 PM

    and she thinks its ok to live in dog poop and pee? cant your husband talk to her?

    Quoting melindabelcher:

    We live with my mil. They are her dogs


    Quoting LittleBirdFly:

    so you living with with who now? Because you said :my mother choses to let us move out"

    whos dogs are thoese? If the poop and pee on the floor I would kick the dogs out! The health of you and especially of the baby has priority!


    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Believe me if we didn't have to we wouldn't.

    My father is a crack addict and my mother chose to let us move out rather then ask him to stay elsewhere.

    We are trying to find a cheaper vehicle so we can get into a family shelter. Our current vehicle is valued 9000-ish but we owe 13000ish. We can't have any assets valued greater then 5000.

    My mother in law is the lesser of the evils available at this time :(

    I'm hoping to surrender our car today and tommorow in the er there will be a social worker available to help us.

    I know your not bashing :) I would think the same thing and would have never imagined we would ever be in this situation.





    Quoting snowangel1979:

    I'm not bashing or anything but WHY?


    Why would you stay somewhere covered in dog feces and pee? Just breathing that can't be good for your health. Could you maybe stay at your parents house instead.







    Quoting melindabelcher:

    Because where we are staying the floors are constantly covered in dog urine/feces and theres 3 child hating chihuahuas.



    The solids is cause I was concerned she would come to expect them. This is my first bls the other ones were spoon/jar fed and knew it was time to eat. Not sure how long we'll be in a shelter and how often nutritous/baby appropiate solids will be available.



    Idk.









    Quoting notjstanothrmom:

    I wouldn't stop her from crawling. I understand not wanting her to but why limit her growth?

    As for the solids, that I agree with. Maybe not for those reasons (how would not being in a stable house effect her eating habits?) but that is a completely acceptable age to be breastfed only.










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