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Step children and holidays?
by Anonymous
October 23, 2013 at 4:37 PM

Dh's daughter is 12 years old. She will be 13 year old Feburary 7th. She told dh that every year for halloween she goes trick or treating with her friend at her grandma's house. knowing this we went ahead and made plans to take the boys to my mom's house and trick or treat around her neighborhood like we do every year. Well last night dh called his daughter up to see what she was doing and find out how her week was going. She asked if she could spend halloween with us this year. Dh told her we'd talk about it this weekend when she came over.

Halloween this year falls on a school night. Dh's daughter lives a good 30 minutes or more away depending on traffic. She doesn't get out of school until 3:45pm. By the time she gets home it's almost 4pm. If you figure in driving time he wouldn't get home from picking her up until 5:30pm. By the time she ate dinner and got her costume on it would be around 6pm. That would only leave about 45 minutes or so to trick or treat before we had to get ready to leave to drive her home. She would need time to do homework, take a shower and whatever else she does to get ready for school. to me 45 minutes to trick or treat doesn't seem like enough time. We like to take the kids up to fritz's for an ice cream cone because everyone who shows up in costume gets a free ice cream cone. how would we have time to do all of that in 45 minutes?

I don't want to sound like a big but. I always encourage dh to spend time with his daughter. it's just that we don't take his daughter on the week days because she has school and there really isn't enough time to pick her up and do something before we have to turn right around and take her home. What would you do?  


  • An0nym0use
    October 23, 2013 at 4:41 PM
    *Shrug* We always go 30 minutes to go trick or treating at my brother's house. Our neighborhood doesn't allow it, so it's either that or trunk or treat, which sounds dumb to me. So off we go. We get there at 530 pm and get home at 930 and no one has ever had any issues with school the next day. We've been doing it this way for 10-ish years.
  • smalltownmom03
    October 23, 2013 at 4:44 PM
    Can he pick her up at that you can get an earlier start?
  • tcallisto
    October 23, 2013 at 4:45 PM

    I would go ahead and get her and let her spend this the evening with her brothers.  My ex lives far also, and on special occasions or events, we make exceptions.  Is it possible to pick her up at school so there can be a head start?  The teacher might not have homework that night.  If she asked to come, there must be a reason she would like to spend that evening with you.

  • onaflowers
    October 23, 2013 at 4:47 PM
    She should be wearing a costume at school and you could stop for a cheeseburger on the way home. I don't see the big time crunch.
  • young_lv_mom
    October 23, 2013 at 4:47 PM
    What if you all went trick or treating near her house?
  • Anonymous 2
    by Anonymous 2
    October 23, 2013 at 4:50 PM

    Make it happen. If that means putting homework off for a day grabbing dinner on the drive going to a closer neighborhood you do it. She is only a child once and if she wants to spend it with yall so be.

  • Anonymous 3
    by Anonymous 3
    October 23, 2013 at 4:52 PM

    trick or treating in my town is from 6-8. So she would have 2 hours of trick or treating time here! 

    But if it looks like it won't work time wise for you guys, then tell her no. 

  • Anonymous 3
    by Anonymous 3
    October 23, 2013 at 4:53 PM

    Kids can't dress up in their costumes at school where I live. 

    Quoting onaflowers:

    She should be wearing a costume at school and you could stop for a cheeseburger on the way home. I don't see the big time crunch.

  • mom2theA-team
    October 23, 2013 at 4:59 PM

    My five year old is homeschooled, there are days she does school work in the car. I would make it contingent upon her going that she does homework in the car. 

    I would also just pick her up from school and tell her to be in her costume.

    Or take her home the following morning.  

  • KyliesMom5
    October 23, 2013 at 5:02 PM

     I'm driving an hour and half to go trick or treating in the neighborhood we went to for years.

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