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Send him a pic of the evidence now, or wait until he gets home?
by Anonymous
July 24, 2013 at 6:00 PM
Dh has battled with prescription painkiller addiction for several years. I recently found out he had relapsed. I gave him an ultimatum and he has been on board.

Before the ultimatum h spent a few days with his grandma who takes prescription fentanyl patches...when he came home I noticed the outline if a sticker in his leg. I knew she took fentanyl, but they know about his addiction too and usually hide theirs. He denied it, but I think I knew anyway I just left it at that.

Now, I found an empty wrapper from the fentanyl patch in his suitcase. I know it's from that weekend.

We've been getting along fine since the ultimatum, and he used it before agreeing to work things out.

I don't want to rock the boat for something in the past if he's actually moving forward with changes. It I'm pissed. He's such an idiot. I lost my brother to a heroin overdose, and this patch could have killed him.

So do I confront him when he gets home? I took a pic of it and taped it to the bathroom mirror. It could be hours before he gets home and I'm fuming. Why should I have to suck it up while he's at work? I want to text him a picture of it now...but there's not much he can say about it. He works in customers homes.

Replies

  • thickmamaof2
    July 24, 2013 at 6:02 PM
    Send him a pic
  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    July 24, 2013 at 6:06 PM
    I feel like that's just going to puss him off and be distant when he gets home.

    Quoting thickmamaof2:

    Send him a pic
  • Mommy2b2many
    July 24, 2013 at 6:09 PM
    I'd wait till he gets home... sounds like a serious conversation; and one that should be done in person
  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    July 24, 2013 at 6:11 PM
    Bump
  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    July 24, 2013 at 6:14 PM
    That's what I'm leaning towards. I'm just anxious and pissed. I'm basically pacing in the house.

    Quoting Mommy2b2many:

    I'd wait till he gets home... sounds like a serious conversation; and one that should be done in person
  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous
    July 24, 2013 at 6:16 PM
    It was before the ultimatum so I don't see the point in bringing it up. I'm quite sure he kept a lot of drug use from you before. He's suppose to be clean slated so I'd leave it alone.
  • GrinningCheese
    July 24, 2013 at 6:18 PM

    Quoting Anonymous:

    I feel like that's just going to puss him off and be distant when he gets home.

    Quoting thickmamaof2:

    Send him a pic

    I agree and if he can't have a conversation with you after you send the pic it'll give him plenty of time to come up with an excuse or reason for it being there.
  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous
    July 24, 2013 at 6:18 PM
    Um; sending a picture... or taping a picture to the mirror doesn't sound like the best way to handle the situation. I'd talk to him when he gets home in a non accusing manner
  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    July 24, 2013 at 6:19 PM
    I'm not so much mad about the lying as I am about the fact it was a fentanyl patch. That is far worse than popping a few Vicodin. It's irresponsible and could have left our dd fatherless. It was a large dose.

    He left because I threatened divorce and told him i would leave if he didn't get clean. So technically it was after the ultimatum but before he agreed to it.

    Quoting Anonymous:

    It was before the ultimatum so I don't see the point in bringing it up. I'm quite sure he kept a lot of drug use from you before. He's suppose to be clean slated so I'd leave it alone.
  • camocountrymom
    July 24, 2013 at 6:21 PM
    This. If he hasn't used since before the ultimatum, you confronting him may cause a trigger. I'm sure its tough but tread lightly. Good luck.


    Quoting Anonymous:

    It was before the ultimatum so I don't see the point in bringing it up. I'm quite sure he kept a lot of drug use from you before. He's suppose to be clean slated so I'd leave it alone.

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