Mom Confessions

ArisMom208
Supervised visitation? Is there a chance?
July 2, 2013 at 7:13 AM

DH and I seperated on the 24th of June. He had a new girlfriend within hours and brought her to the house to get his stuff. He picked her up that morning off of a dating site and she hasn't left his house (Hes living alone in a friends rental house. rent free) Every day shes been there.   DD is 16 months

He had a job....he quit.

WE had a car together and he traded it in to finance a mini van to haul her children around.

Shes moving in with him after 1 week. Offically moving in, before she was just staying there. 

He threatens to take our daughter and go to Colorado, live with family and hide out so I can never find her and will never see her again.

He has 2 domestic violence protection orders against him.

In September 2012 we had a domestic violence at a hotel, cops were called but nothing was filed.

My daughter has little to no relationship with him. On average he spent an hour a day with her and that was even when he was unemployed.


I know some of those won't really count against him...but he wants 50/50 custody, he gets 2 weeks a month. I get 2 weeks a month.

I want him to have supervised visitation only right now, until he can establish a GOOD relationship with her and I can trust him enough not to leave. He has family in new york, colorado, nebraska and says that he can and will disappear with her and a "stupid piece of paper" isn't going to stop that. 

Do i stand a chance of getting him ONLY supervised visitation or am I screwed? 

Replies

  • SageAdvice
    July 2, 2013 at 7:18 AM

     Most states will not allow a parent to move out of state with a child anymore unless both parents agree.

    I'd suggest you try to record him threatening to hide her in another state and not caring what a court order say.

  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous
    July 2, 2013 at 7:18 AM

    You need to use the fact that he's not living in a stable environment (paying bills) or gainfully employed to prove he has no ties to the community, making him a potential flight risk. 

    How does he pay the utilities, food and gas? What does the new gf do? (I know she has nothing to do with it, I'm just nosy!)

  • kiriis
    by kiriis
    July 2, 2013 at 7:19 AM
    I think you have a good shot at it. My situation was similar to yours and ex has 1 hour supervised visits a week.
  • Rain2Rinse
    July 2, 2013 at 7:22 AM
    I'm not sure how these things worked. I hired a fantastic attorney that was well known in my community. We went to court, the judge asked what I wanted. I told her supervised visitation at my discretion. She gave him one 3 hour supervised visit per month, as long as he gives me 2 week notice... And he lives out of state.

    I didn't even have to mention that he threatened to leave the country with her.
  • BrownEyedGirl86
    July 2, 2013 at 7:39 AM
    I would print out the threats to leave.
    I wouldn't bring up the gf.
    I would just explain that he didn't spend time when you were together and w the threats it makes you uncomfortable. Not to mention bjs family in other states.

    Did you hire a lawyer??
  • ArisMom208
    July 2, 2013 at 10:42 AM


    Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

    I would print out the threats to leave.
    I wouldn't bring up the gf.
    I would just explain that he didn't spend time when you were together and w the threats it makes you uncomfortable. Not to mention bjs family in other states.

    Did you hire a lawyer??

    Not yet...but I'm going too talk with one today

  • chasinrainbows
    July 2, 2013 at 10:51 AM
    Unless you have PROOF that he made these threats....he won't get supervised visits. Personally, I would hire an attorney ASAP and file for a divorce along with full custody. IF you really want to be a bitch (and honestly, I prolly would because of the new GF), have your attorney put some provisions in your court order such as "no overnight guest that either party is romantically involved with unless married", "Both parties must wait 6 month into a new relationship before introducing child to new partner".

    I can tell you this. Courts really don't like people moving on so quickly while still married. Do you have any transportation?
  • BrownEyedGirl86
    July 2, 2013 at 5:52 PM
    I wish you the best of luck!!!!

    Quoting ArisMom208:


    Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

    I would print out the threats to leave.

    I wouldn't bring up the gf.

    I would just explain that he didn't spend time when you were together and w the threats it makes you uncomfortable. Not to mention bjs family in other states.



    Did you hire a lawyer??

    Not yet...but I'm going too talk with one today

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