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mom at 16, A total disgrace! THOUGHTS? (EDIT blue)
by Anonymous
February 2, 2013 at 3:49 AM

For anyone who thinks I am trying to make teen pregnancy something magical and perfect I am not. I am now 19 years old and my son will be three this year, We are not on PA, FS or any type of assistance for the past 18 months. My Husband is 20 has a job that brings enough to survive comfortably, no we're not rich but we rent our home, brought our furniture even if it is second hand and a little ratty, I am doing online schooling and trying to get my GED this year, I took the last 2 years off to care of my son because I do not like daycare centers and didn't want my son away from me. I NEVER go out, I have no friends, I have no life outside my family because I gave it all up! I love him, I love my DH, honestly I love my life and once again for that I am judged because I am PROUD OF HOW FAR WE HAVE CAME SINCE THAT DAY I MADE THE CHOICE FOR THIS TO BE OUR LIFE I am not proud of being pregnant at 16.

This is my story from my heart. Pregnant at 15 and a mom at 16.


I want a car,

Get out of this place,

Tired of being seen as a disgrace,

16 years young I became a mom,

but to me its the best thing I have ever done.

I love what I have created that baby I hold everyday,

Of course I have had to change my teenage ways,

What I hate the most is my decisions are seen as mistakes,

People say hes taken my childhood and I have taken his faith.

He'll grow up in a broken home they say,

While I will be a welfare mom until my last days,

What people don't realise is I walked out that day,

I was going to pretend this never happened,

Have it all cleared away,

None of you would have known he even had existed,

That he was even here,

But seeing that black and white picture gave me tears,

I held my breath and shook my head,

I told me them to let me off the bed,

I held my moms hand and asked her to take me home,

I didnt want this, I guess she heard it in my tone,

I knew there was a reason that nurse turned the screen,

She knew one day I would dream,

Of the child I gave up, The one I thought I couldnt raise,

Even now the stares, words, the judgement put me in a daze,

I wonder what people would think of me if I had gone through with it,

If they had never seen his face?

I wonder if I would still be the family disgrace?

The family judges me, puts me down,

My mom stand by me and never frowns!

I hold my head high but inside I'm drowning in emotional rain,

They put me in the same catagory as people with an addiction,

Disgusting trash,

I dont deserve a crucifixion,

I am not dirty nor am I a whore,

I didnt spread my legs like an open door,

I didnt make a mistake, I made a life,

My son doesnt deserve the judgement nor do I.

I had a baby young,

I left my childhood behind me,

I was not robbed of a life,

I gave it away,

I gave it up for a beautiful baby,

And for that I am thankful everyday.



  • Anonymous 4
    by Anonymous 4
    February 2, 2013 at 8:27 AM
    That poem would not get her into Harvard! Come on now. I doubt it would even be published

    Quoting supercarp:

    You are certainly an intelligent person, by the way you write. You can be a super mom and succeed where your parents failed. Sex is not the be-all, end-all great pastime of the world. Obviously you know that now. Promise yourself to finish your education. You can still go to college, even if your parents don't see the point in it. Do something great, like publish your poems. That could get you into Harvard (Their scholarships are need-based) or any great college. There is help. You can have a wonderful life. You have a wonderful child. Do it for yourself and for him.

  • Anonymous 6
    by Anonymous 6
    February 2, 2013 at 8:28 AM
    It's no more disgraceful than the boy that helped her make that baby.

    Quoting SommelierMom:

    Sorry, but being a teen mom IS a disgrace in my opinion, especially a young one.

  • Anonymous 7
    by Anonymous 7
    February 2, 2013 at 8:28 AM

    16 year olds should not be parents.  This poem is like Teen Mom, glamorising teen pregnancy.

  • SommelierMom
    February 2, 2013 at 8:29 AM

    Quoting Anonymous:

     Can I ask why? what to you is disgraceful about it?

    Quoting SommelierMom:

    Sorry, but being a teen mom IS a disgrace in my opinion, especially a young one.

    It shows a lack of morals.  Why are you having sex as a child?

    It statistically skyrockets the chances of you never completing your education.

    It raises the chances you'll be on PA.  Generational poverty is a very real thing.

  • lizzie490
    February 2, 2013 at 8:30 AM
    Very mature of you young lady! You chose life, never feel bad for that! Stay strong, and raise that baby son of yours with your head up high. Ü
  • mamatocaleb
    February 2, 2013 at 8:30 AM

     Its tough being a young mom. Even at 20 people thought we were moving too fast. But I was married and had a home and still people say stuff. Now we have 3 children and people say stuff. I let them talk because they just don't understand I am young but my family is what I WANT and I wouldn't trade it or change it.

  • SommelierMom
    February 2, 2013 at 8:32 AM

    Quoting Anonymous:

    It's no more disgraceful than the boy that helped her make that baby.

    Quoting SommelierMom:

    Sorry, but being a teen mom IS a disgrace in my opinion, especially a young one.

    I didn't say it wasn't.

  • Anonymous 8
    by Anonymous 8
    February 2, 2013 at 8:34 AM
    Why do people try so hard to make teen pregnancy out to be ok? IT IS NOT! No matter how you spin it, how innocent you make it look, how much of a novelty its turned into, how much you romanticize it, justify it, it is still never ok. I wish people would stop trying to put rosey colored glass over an clear issue due to their own shame.
  • Mommy0505
    February 2, 2013 at 8:34 AM
    I always hated how I was referred to as a "mistake" and vowed to never do the same to my son. He was certainly a surprise, but NOT a mistake.

    Honestly he was the best thing that could have happened to me at that age (16).

    Now he's almost 11 and one of the brightest and most well-rounded kids you'll meet!

    And although my family told me I had ruined my life, I still managed to be the only one to get a college education and move out of poverty. Life was 100% harder with a child, but it was 100% worth it.

    Good luck to you!!
  • Anonymous 9
    by Anonymous 9
    February 2, 2013 at 8:36 AM
    It's just a negative aspect of our society that judgment is a consequence. Teen mothers take on a lot when they have those babies. Motherhood, finishing school, all the things that should have been easy are then a huge struggle. But they do it because they are mamas too. They see their babies and they are just as in love and dedicated as someone ten years their senior. Yes, she made a mistake, but why judge her negatively when you could praise her strength? If more teen mothers were given support instead of made to feel like they are less than a mother then their lives and the lives of their children would benefit.
    No, I was not a teen mother, but I strongly believe society should be more supportive.
    A mother is a mother is a mother, doesn't matter age, race or nationality.

    Quoting Anonymous:

    It's just like a teenager to think they shouldn't have to deal with the consequences of their actions.

    Either way you had a baby before you were married, a college graduate or even had a home to take your baby. That's a mistake. And if it wasnt a mistake and it was a purposeful act then you're just stupid.

    Congrats on the wedding.

    Quoting Anonymous:

     We got married just last month and yes I understand the judgement but I dont think I deserve it

    Quoting Anonymous:

    It's a nice poem but you knew you would be judged when you decided to keep your son. That goes with the territory of being a teen mom.

    Are you with the dad?


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