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Anonymous
I'm dependant on my husband, so what
by Anonymous
January 31, 2013 at 12:06 PM
First let me say, although I am a sahm I have a great degree, I am completely capable of getting a job and taking over financially if god forbid something were to happen to dh. I was raised in a family where not going to college wasn't an option. I worked full time right out of school, I worked after getting married, it wasn't until dd was born that I decided to stay home.

I love being home. I dont worry about bills. My dd never has to go to daycare, I am able to teach her and I feel that's an advantage because she is already doing things most children her age can't do. My family has a home cooked meal every night. I am able to keep up on housework and to me all of these thing interest me WAY more than being a working mom.

Unfortunately I feel that people, even my own family members, feel that I am not doing something useful/ beneficial for myself. They are always asking, so when are you going back to work, or are you going to continue your education?......when? I feel like screaming, why isn't taking care of my family a good enough answer. My priority is family, and I think that's a pretty damn important job. After I am done having kids and they are old enough that they don't need me 24/7 then yes maybe I will return to work/school, but that's not for awhile and I wish everyone would just leave me alone about it.

Also, I am not an anti pa mom but for the record we are not on any assistance and we are by no means struggling.

Replies

  • outtamymynd
    January 31, 2013 at 12:16 PM
    Agreed. I'll have my time when my youngest is in school (she's 3).
  • Superlaura328
    January 31, 2013 at 12:16 PM

    I hate people who criticize moms like me for working... and on that same note, I hate people who criticize moms for wanting to stay home with their children! I feel that every family should be able to make the choice that is best for them without anyone getting "all up in their grill" about it. It sucks that you have to deal with that :(

  • aikimomof3
    January 31, 2013 at 12:19 PM

    I will never understand why ANYONE bothers to care what other people think. I have been a working mom, I have been a SAHM, and I am currently a WAHM. Not once has anyone else's comments about my situation bothered me. No one knows your situation, and no one else is living your life. So why care what they think???

  • VarelaClan
    January 31, 2013 at 12:20 PM
    Lol. This is me, but with 4 kids.


    Quoting lil_momma_vdv:

    Yea my man supports my lazy ass, our girls are spoiled and he wouldn't want it any other way!!!

  • Anonymous 3
    by Anonymous 3
    January 31, 2013 at 12:23 PM

    I have a master's and managerial experience. I've looked it up, if I wanted to get a job I could probably get one making significantly more than dh brings home. But I'm tired of working on other people's terms so I started my own business. As soon as I got my master's my parents were like, so are you going to get a job now? And I was like, yeah I guess. But not really. Getting another job is a temporary solution. I want to run my own company, so I have some flexibility to be there for my dd. My mom left us behind in the Philippines for 5 years while she worked to make a better life for us here, and even when we got here she worked 7 days a week. I try not to resent her for being gone so much, I know she did it for us, but I still want more for my family. Plus, unlike my mom, I don't have free babysitters that I can fully trust (we were watched by family when my mom was gone and dad was traveling with the military) that can watch her while I work. So it's just not the same situation at all. But I get tired of explaining that so I just stopped. 

  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster
    January 31, 2013 at 12:28 PM
    I understand what you are saying, I'd even like to say I agree 100% its just that after hearing the same thing over and over again it starts to wear on me.


    Quoting aikimomof3:

    I will never understand why ANYONE bothers to care what other people think. I have been a working mom, I have been a SAHM, and I am currently a WAHM. Not once has anyone else's comments about my situation bothered me. No one knows your situation, and no one else is living your life. So why care what they think???


  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster
    January 31, 2013 at 12:31 PM
    I commend working mothers. There have been a few times where I had things to do where I'd have to wake up early and get dd and myself ready and get her to a sitter. Just that alone is extremely difficult.


    Quoting Superlaura328:

    I hate people who criticize moms like me for working... and on that same note, I hate people who criticize moms for wanting to stay home with their children! I feel that every family should be able to make the choice that is best for them without anyone getting "all up in their grill" about it. It sucks that you have to deal with that :(


  • carterscutie85
    January 31, 2013 at 12:34 PM

    Maybe they are just concerned that if something happens you will have a hard time getting back into the work field even with a degree, kwim? Lots of people with degrees out there and no jobs these days.

  • SusieQue717
    January 31, 2013 at 12:34 PM

    I am a full time working mother, and my family has a home cooked breakfast and dinner every day. I also live in a spotless home. I don't see what one thing has to do with the other? If you manage your time right, they can have the same things. My kids have a nanny, so they don't go to daycare either. 

  • mamatocaleb
    January 31, 2013 at 12:35 PM

     I've done both, and personally I like that we have a little more money to do what we need to do and want to do. I like helping financially, but yes he makes a lot more than me. I am dependent on his income as he is NOW dependent on mine. We both chip in with taking care of the kids and paying bills. That is the way it SHOULD be. Daddies should be able to care for the children as well without it being called "babysitting".

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